Page 82 of Hell & Back

“Damn, Darren. You came forever. Is it like that all the time?” Tuck sat with his back against the headboard, watching the two of them.

“The drug is designed to make the person come harder and longer than they’ve ever come in their life.” He rubbed up anddown Kylie’s arm. “And it does. Usually after I come, I never feel satisfied and I’m ready to immediately go again. With Kylie, this is the first time I’ve actually had a satisfying orgasm where I didn’t feel like I needed to bide my time until I could do it again.”

“Should I take that as a good thing or a bad thing?” Kylie frowned up at him.

“It’s a fucking great thing. Don’t get me wrong. I came longer and harder than I have with anyone else, but I also feel…” he searched for the right word. “Relief. Like I can relax and just be in the moment and not have to worry about when the need to fuck is going to hit me again. It’s been like a chore to have sex. I was only doing it to relieve the pain. With you, I was completely invested in you and the act of having sex.”

“Sounds like you should’ve come home sooner.” Tuck hitched an accusatory brow his direction.

Kylie yawned wide. “I need a nap.” She rooted her shoulder deeper into Darren’s side.

He tipped her head back with a finger under her chin in order to get her eyes. “Tell me the truth, Kylie. Did I hurt you?”

Her frown was completely aggravated. “You were right there. You were no more rough than Tuck and he was fucking my ass. I begged you to fuck me harder so don’t try and turn our first time together in far too long into something it isn’t. Just enjoy it and bask in the afterglow.”

“Bask in the afterglow?” Tuck laughed.

“Yes. That’s what I said. Now, who’s going to get me some chocolate cake and pull the covers up?”

“I’ll go get your cake. Darren can cover you up.” Tuck got up and swatted Kylie’s ass before heading to the kitchen. “Be back in a minute.”

Darren sat up and pulled the covers over the both of them, then took a moment to enjoy the quiet with Kylie in his arms. His mind hadn’t felt this peaceful since before he’d been drugged. Hewas so relaxed he thought he might even fall asleep. It would be the first time without having to drink until he passed out.

“What did they do to you?” Kylie’s softly spoken words made him tense. All thoughts of being relaxed and falling asleep unaided were gone. Maybe if he pretended to be asleep, she’d drop it.

“Please, Darren?” He felt her head tip back to look at him.

The thought of telling her everything he’d been through made him sick to his stomach. Even as he fought with himself as to whether or not to share or how much, he knew he’d end up telling her. Even before she forgave him and welcomed him back into her bed, he’d had a hard time denying her anything. If he was going to do this he was going to do it sitting up. He unwrapped his arm from around her waist and pushed himself up so his back was to the headboard. Kylie also sat up, turning to face him.

Unable to look her in the eye, he focused on the pillow he’d pulled onto his lap. “The first day there, they beat me. Asked me questions about the club. When I wouldn’t tell them anything, they injected me with that shit and cut my clothes off before throwing me in a cell. Or at least that’s what I think they did. Everything’s a little blurry about that.

“I must have passed out at some point because I woke up in a cell to this slapping sound. I couldn’t figure out what it was. It took a minute, but I finally managed to sit up and was able to look around. In the cell across from me there was this man jacking off like his life depended on it. I didn’t know it at the time, but he was in so much pain, he was desperate to get off. The guy in the cell next to mine explained about the drug and how it worked. He also said that what the guy across from us was doing was a result of being drugged and unable to come.” He shook his head. “I found out later that the only thing that eases the pain is having a fucking orgasm, but the catch is, you can’tgive one to yourself no matter how hard you try.” He lifted his gaze. “And yes, I tried.”

He closed his eyes and dropped his head back against the wall. “I’m not sure on the time because there weren’t any windows where they were holding me. I don’t know if it was hours or days, but at some point, they ended up bringing me a woman.” He snorted and shook his head. “She was more like a girl. Twenty-one years old. They threw her in there naked. She was scared to death and huddled in the corner as far away from me as she could get. They left her with me for hours and the whole time I was trying to hide my raging hard on. Hell, she might not have ever seen a dick before for all I know. Anyway, I tried to talk to her and found out her name was Amy and that she’d been taken from one of the Phantoms’ parties. Fuck. It was so damn hard not to fuck her. Especially, when there was fucking going on in the cells on either side of me.”

Kylie placed her hand on his arm, causing him to straighten his head and open his eyes. She had her pillow pulled to her chest, the covers having fallen away when he’d sat up. She wasn’t crying and she wasn’t offering any platitudes like everything was going to be all right. All he saw in her eyes was the same strength in them that she’d had when she came to the motel and confronted him. Because there was no pity in her eyes, it gave him the ability to finish telling her about his time in captivity.

“The next day they drugged me again and brought a different woman to my cell. It was Sadie. She’d been given a dose and at first, she wasn’t doing too bad. But like me, the longer she had it in her, the stronger the need to fuck hit her. Eventually, it got the better of her and I was already too far gone and in pain that I just couldn’t take it anymore. We finally broke down and fucked. The relief was instant for both of us. I could breathe again.” He hated that he was telling her all this. “That’s when my brain came back online and I realized that I’d fucked another womanand she wasn’t you. It didn’t matter how much guilt and shame I was feeling because it didn’t take long for the pain in my dick to come roaring back again. It was like I hadn’t gotten off at all. We did it a couple of more times, then Race and the guys showed up to rescue me and the others.”

One side of Kylie’s mouth hitched up and she squeezed his hand. “I know that was hard, but thank you.” He wasn’t sure what she was thanking him for, but she obviously meant it. She crawled up next to him so that he was forced to raise his arm and let her get as close as she could get. He grabbed at the covers and pulled them up to keep Kylie warm. He glanced around the room, noticing Tuck had never returned yet.

“You can come in now!” he yelled toward the door. He’d bet money his friend stood in the hall listening to the whole thing. That was fine because Darren wasn’t sure how much he could have said in front of him.

Tuck came in carrying the whole cake pan and three forks. He crawled back into bed and set the pan next to Kylie. He squeezed her leg through the covers, silently asking if she was okay.

“I know you both think I’m an idiot for not coming home right after I got back to town.” Both Kylie and Tuck raised their hands in agreement, causing him to chuckle. “At this very moment I wonder the same thing. All I can say is that I was feeling so much shame and guilt I didn’t know how to handle it. Add the drugs messing with my head as much as my dick and I wasn’t in a good place. I know we said we would never talk about this again, but sex with the other women was just that. Sex. A way to get off. And as bad as it sounds, I didn’t have to worry about what they might think of me. There were no emotions involved. With you, I would rather kill myself than hurt you in any way. And yet I did it anyway.”

“Darren,” she crawled into his lap and clasped his cheeks with both hands. “I’d be lying if I said it didn’t hurt, that I didn’t feel rejected when you turned to those other women. It’ll take some time for the sting to go away, but the bottom line is I love you and I cannot live my life without you.”

“But what will you say when the other old ladies find out? And yes, we all know they will find out.”

“I really like those women, but if they give me or you any shit about it, I’ll tell them it’s none of their fucking business. It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but the three of us.”

Staring into her eyes, he could feel her conviction and pitied the old ladies if they thought to tell her how to live her life.

“I love you so much, Kylie.” He snaked his hand behind her neck and drew her in for a kiss.

“Love you, too,” she replied once they were finished.

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