Page 109 of When Glitter Meets Gold

“Ah man, this is not how I wanted you to find out.” He makes a prayer gesture with his hands and steps toward me. “Look, I had this entire speech prepared where I told you…I know how this looks, and trust me, I’m going to explain everything.”

A throat clears beside me. Francis gives me a nod, then narrows his eyes to pin holes as he glares at Drew. “I’ll be over there.” He steps back, not taking his eyes from Drew as he gives us some space to talk.

“Sara… I never meant to come between you and that job, it was never even on my radar. But the money and… Look I was going crazy doing the same thing every day, I needed a new challenge.” He steps toward me, and I have this huge urge to kick him right in the dick. I think he might sense it because for once, he applies sense, and retreats.

“Listen, my job doesn’t pay for my lifestyle. I did what I had to. Hey, you flew all the way to Maine to get people to take you seriously. We do what we have to, you get that right?”

I want to tell him that whatever he thinks he knows about that trip, is whatever I fed him in a moment of feeling exhausted and vulnerable. He doesn’t know anything about that trip.

“I get it,” I say, because I do. He nods, and before he canreply I cut in, “Which is why I’m not really mad about the job. Anyone had a right to interview. I probably could have gotten over that.” I shrug before my voice changes and my teeth grind together. “I guess I’m mad because of how low you had to stoop for a pay cheque.”

Drew scratches his chin. “You just said you weren’t mad about the job.” He shifts his weight slowly from one foot to another, like the simple movement is uncomfortable.

“I’m talking about the leaked figures. I know it was you.”

He flinches. Visibly recoils.

Then my voice strains and the venom drains from my system, because suddenly I’m not furious or angry or hellbent on causing a scene until everyone in the vicinity knows what he did. I just want the truth.

“So please, drop the act and just tell me. Why did you do it, Drew? Why, when I thought we were friends? The job, I get,” I say before the venom returns for one final dose. “But this…this is fucked up. Make it make sense.”

His face becomes something unfamiliar. Something sad yet ferocious. Something with too much energy bubbling under its surface. He raises his hands, raking his fingers along the sides of his slicked back hair. Then, he grabs my arm and tugs.

“What are you doing?” I protest as I’m dragged through crowds of people too absorbed in the party to notice the manhandling. I twist to find Francis who’s cutting through the swell of bodies to follow us. “You’re hurting me.” I try to free myself as I’m herded into a small alcove between the grand hall and the lobby where it’s just the two of us.

When he eventually releases me, he’s sweating and frantic. “I don’t have female friends, Sara.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” I wince as I rub my arm. Francis appears beneath the archway, but Iflash him a nod to signal I’m okay. He retreats, disappearing behind an enormous ivory pillar where I know he’ll be listening to every word.

“I thought,” Drew says, glancing at the archway, probably checking that we’re alone and nobody can hear him confess. “I thought you were into me. I literally got on a plane and came to find you. You gave me every sign you wanted me to follow you there.”

I gasp. “Are you kidding? I barely knew you.”

He folds his arms across his chest. “Whatever, you wanted me to chase you,” he says. “Everyone thought you were lying about meeting Vandenberg on the trails. But I know it’s true. I know you met him, spent the night with him, then forgot about me. He was on your mind the entire time. While I looked like an idiot in your hotel room. You chose him.”

He begins to pace in a circle. I’ve never seen him behave like this, it’s out of character. Or perhaps it isn’t at all…

A loose wire.That’s what Jack called him.

“Drew, it wasn’t like that,” I begin as the ringing bell of realization blares in my subconscious.

“He’s not the good guy you think he is, why do you keep choosing him?” His face is turning into a tomato, a lid about to blow. “This is exactly why I had to expose him. He’s not the hero everyone thinks he is. I needed you to see that. He’s arrogant, and you let him turn you into that too. There’s no other reason you’d turn me down. He did that to you, he made you think that you’re above being with me.”

Each word pulls me further from being present in this conversation and drags me into a spiral of rage because he doesn’t know the first thing about the type of man Jack is. I raise both hands to my temples, inhaling slowly to bringmyself back to a state of semi-calm where I don’t burst into a ball of flames.

“Hold on.” I interrupt before he continues. “Did you do all this to get rid of him? Did you think it would mean that we’d have a chance?” I hear my voice dip, my patience almost gone.

Drew shrugs. The absurdity perhaps finally registering.

“Oh my god, you’re so consumed by the need to win. No, this isn’t about being robbed of our chance together, this is about ego. It’s gross. You don’t care about me, you don’t even know the first thing about me.”

“And he stole your job!” The high-pitched notes of Francis sail from behind the pillar.

“Right!” I nod profusely. “And you stole my job.”

“Ihadto take the job,” Drew says gravely. “I knew deep down that even if the figures got out, it wouldn’t change anything. Because as long as you had Vandenberg in your corner, you’d always get whatever you wanted.” His jaw clenches. “Not all of us can sleep our way to success.”

My insides feel like they’re being gouged out. My eyes feel tight, and my throat works to keep down the anger that bubbles from the inside.

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