Page 72 of The Broposal

“Oh…” he started, closing the door behind him discreetly as words seemed to evade him. Jackie grinned victoriously, and in that moment I hated her all over again. Had shewantedHan to catch us? I knew our relationship wasn’t real, but Jackie didn’t know that. What she did know was that I had been drinking. She knew Han was coming back. And she kissed me anyway.

“I swear, it’s not what it looks like!” I pleaded, partially to keep up with the act, but also because I didn’t want Han tothink anything of it. I had just told him things were over with Jackie, and if he thought I was having second thoughts, he’d freak out over the wedding.

“Looks like you two have a lot to work out. I’ll leave you to it,” Jackie said, then sauntered back down the hallway toward the stairs as if the night had gone exactly how she’d planned. Once she was out of earshot, I covered my face with my hands.

“I fucked up,” I said.

“We said no dating other people.”

“I know, I know. She just kissed me, and I wasn’t expecting it. It won’t happen again. I promise.”

“I’m just gonna… go back inside,” Han said, and reached for the door.

“I’ll go with you!” I grabbed Han’s hand. “I’m sorry I almost blew our cover. I really am,” I said.

“It’s fine,” Han said, even though there was an edge in his tone that said otherwise. I opened the door and helped him inside before anyone could get too suspicious.

Once the door opened, the act was back on. Han’s jaw unclenched, and he relaxed in my arms, leaning on me while he hopped back to the couch. I moved to kiss him before I remembered the rule I myself had set. No kissing. I hated that damn rule, but it was definitely for the best. I couldn’t turn Han into a rebound. I helped him sit down, then took another shot before going to the bathroom to cool off.

What the hell had I just done? Why hadn’t I stopped Jackie from kissing me? If it had been anyone but Han who walked out, it would have ruined everything. Somehow, though, Han walking out still felt like the worst possible outcome. I hadn’t wanted to let him down, but that was exactly what I’d just done.

I stared at myself in the mirror, asking myself the samequestion over and over again. What the hell was wrong with me? Then there was a knock on the door. I opened it, eager to make things right with Han.

“I’m so sorry Ha—Leti?”

“We need to talk.” Leti grabbed my wrist and led me down the hallway. I stumbled along behind them, feeling the effects of the alcohol stuttering my steps. “In private,” they said, then gestured to my bedroom door. I had a feeling this was important, so I opened the door and walked inside. They spoke as soon as the door was closed.

“What did you do?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean why is Han brooding all of a sudden? An hour ago he said he wasn’t going to drink, and now he’s getting hammered. What happened when you left? What did you do to my cousin?” Leti put their hands on their hips and stared me down. I always knew they were confrontational when it came to protecting their family, but I’d never been on this side of their aggression before.

“I—I didn’t do anything,” I stuttered. What was I supposed to say?

“Bullshit. Why is he all sad now?”

“He’s sad?” I asked. Han rarely showed his emotions, especially not when he was sad. And it usually took a lot to make him sad-drink. Though I supposed Leti was more in tune with the inner workings of Han than anyone else in the world, besides maybe me.

They just looked at me as if it was obvious. Was Han really that upset about the kiss? I hoped he trusted me enough to know I would keep my word with the wedding. With everything we’d been through, I would have hoped he’d trust me enoughnot to worry about that. So why was he upset enough for Leti to notice?

I wanted to tell Leti everything because I knew they would be able to give the best advice, but Han and I had decided on that first day we couldn’t tell a single soul, and I wasn’t about to break that promise. I wondered if I should come clean about the part of the truth I knew I could trust them with, that Han saw Jackie kissing me, and I didn’t know what to do about it.

“Jackie kissed me,” I finally said.

“Your ex? Did you kiss her back?”

“Not exactly… but I didn’t stop her right away. I just kind of froze up. Han saw us,” I said, the guilt in my voice 100 percent honest.

“Kenny, what the fuck?”

“I know, I know. I’m the worst.”

“Shut up. Stop that. It’s not about you. It’s aboutHan. Do you even want to marry him?”

“Yes.I really, really do.”

We were both quiet for a while before Leti’s eyebrows shot up.

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