Page 83 of The Broposal

“I love you so much,” I managed to say.

Han opened his eyes and looked into mine. “I love you, too.”

And I knew I shouldn’t do it, not now, but this would possibly be my last chance ever. Still, I wanted to make sure Han wanted me to.

“Kiss me?” I asked, my gaze not leaving Han’s. “One last time.”

Han put a hand over mine, which was still cupping his cheek. He slowly leaned forward and pressed our lips together. It wasthe softest kiss of my life. The saddest. As we kissed, our tears blurred together, and I wasn’t sure whose they were anymore, but it didn’t matter.

I was afraid to stop kissing him. If I stopped, we’d have to say goodbye. So I didn’t stop, and neither did Han. It was like there was an unspoken understanding between us that once we stopped, this was really over. Jackie may have taken everything from us, but she couldn’t take this moment. She couldn’t make us say goodbye before we were ready.

I unbuckled my seat belt as the kiss grew deeper and more desperate. I needed to be closer. Han seemed to be on the same page, because he started climbing into the back seat. I followed eagerly. I leaned against the back door, and we held each other tight, our lips taking each other in fervently, not daring to part. His mouth slowly traveled down my neck, and I could feel my pulse softly drumming against his lips. He pulled away to tug his shirt off over his head, and I did the same. His hands rested on my chest while mine found the small of his back. He tenderly planted soft, wet kisses on my mouth, neck, collarbone.

When he finally came up for air, I noticed Han’s eyes found my backpack. I’d forgotten to take it out of my back seat last night, but that was the opposite of a problem right now. Han looked at me with the question in his gaze.

I glanced over at the bag. “Do you want to—”

“Yes,” he answered immediately.

He gave me a little space so I could unzip the backpack. I pulled out the box of condoms, and both me and Han reached inside, our fingers brushing together inside the box before we both froze. I hadn’t even thought about how this part would work. I was a verse, but of course Han had only ever been theone wearing the condoms. He’d said he was a sub, but that didn’t mean he was a bottom.

“Oh… I…” Han started.

“Do you want to…?” I asked.

“I, um… I guess I don’t really know how to do this,” Han admitted, pulling a condom out of the box and staring at it thoughtfully. “I mean, I’ve done anal before, but I was always the one wearing the condoms, you know? I don’t know if I’m ready to…”

“It’s okay, Han,” I said softly, giving him a kiss on the cheek before taking off my pants and discarding them on the car floor. I was no stranger to anal, whether it was sticking it in or being pegged, so I figured Han would be more comfortable wearing the condom this time.

He looked down at the condom, then up at me intensely. “Do you trust me?”

“More than anyone,” I said as I pulled the lube out of the bag and handed it to Han while he unwrapped the condom and slipped it on through his unzipped jeans. Maybe it wasn’t the ideal way for us to have sex for the first (and last) time, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered to me in this moment except Han.

We hungrily pressed our lips against each other, our tongues slowly slipping into rhythm. We held on to each other tight until I found myself lying against the seats. Han kissed a soft spot by my knee, trailing his kisses lower down my thigh until he was between my legs. I ran one of my hands through his hair as he kissed me again and again.

I sucked in a breath when he finally took my penis in his mouth, his tongue circling the tip before pushing it slowly to the back of his throat. I let out a soft moan when his throatwrapped around my cock. His fingers, wet with lube, massaged my hole as he continued sucking. Then, just when he took me in his throat again, he slipped a finger inside me, then two. His mouth and fingers were warm.

A third finger found its way in, stretching me just enough that I was aching for more. Forhim.

He slowly,painfullyslowly, ran his mouth up the base of my cock until he was at the tip. His tongue worked its way around two more times before he looked up at me and climbed forward, withdrawing his fingers so he could get on top. He kissed me as he lowered himself down so our bodies were completely pressed together. We held on as tight as we possibly could, because if we didn’t, I was afraid he would slip right through my fingers. He was going to leave, but not yet.

This was going to end, but not yet.

“Han,please,” I practically whimpered as I wrapped my legs around him tight.

He finally obliged. I gasped for air as he eased inside me, one hand sliding up and down my shaft. He moved slowly at first, as if he was afraid he might break me if he moved too quickly. I hoped against hope that we would never have to stop. Once we stopped, we’d have to say goodbye. Once we stopped, it was really over. But for now, I had Han, and Han had me.

“You feel so good,” I let out through ragged breaths.

The praise seemed to awaken something in Han, because he let out a soft moan and started pushing himself in farther, harder. He tried slightly different angles until he hit that spot just right. Waves of pleasure racked through me as he pounded into me again and again and again.

“Right there!” I reassured him, and he took the hint, hitting the same spot again and again.

“I’m gonna come,” Han said breathlessly.

Then it was like everything I had pent up was begging to burst out of me. All the pressure, the heartache, the anger, the grief and devastation. All the bad things. I couldn’t hold it in any longer.

I let out a helpless cry as it all spilled out of me.

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