Page 32 of Lost In The Dark

“No,” Eli shook his head. “She…we can’t touch her. She freaked out last time.”

“He’s right. I can’t scare her again,” Asher agreed as he got to his feet and backed away a step, fear all over his face. It was a very strange sight. I had faced sheer hell with this man overseas and I had never once seen him look as afraid as he did in that moment.

Addy squeaked in fear again, her hands pressing even tighter over her ears to the point I was sure she was hurting herself.I looked between her brothers again, but they were terrified to touch her. It was all over their faces. They were scared they’d make things worse, but I was pretty sure things couldn’t get any worse for this terrified young woman.

Instead of trying to push them, and mindful of what Addy was suffering I moved to sit beside her against the wall, then I lifted her onto my lap and wrapped my arms tightly around her, pulling her back against my front and surrounding her with as much of my body heat as I could.

It was a foolish thing to do, since the one time she’d met me, she’d looked terrified of me, but I just wanted to soothe her and take the pain she was suffering away, even if just for a short while.

Addy was stiff in my arms, but she stopped trying to rock back and forth as I held her too tightly against me to allow the movement.

“Is that a good idea if she doesn’t like being touched?” Adam asked.

“She needs to realize she’s not alone wherever she’s trapped right now. She needs to know it’s safe to come back and this is the only way I can think to make her feel safe,” I explained.

She was so light and small in my arms, her weight barely registering where she sat in my lap, but she smelled amazing. Vanilla, I realized. She felt right in my arms too. Even as small as she seemed, I knew she was actually quite tall and I couldn’t help but picture how perfectly she’d fit against my body as I held her when we were both stood.

“Be careful of her ribs. They were causing her pain this morning,” Eli reminded me, but I had already realized and washolding her below her injured ribs, also being mindful of her broken wrist.

I wasn’t sure I had ever held a woman as carefully and lovingly as I was holding Addy in that moment. Maybe my sister when she was a kid and scared of her nightmares, but never any other woman. I’d had a few girlfriends along the way and many one night stands, but none of them had ever felt right the way Addy did. None of them had ever stirred my emotions and protective instincts the way this woman did.

I knew I should let her go. I knew what I was feeling could never go anywhere, and yet I couldn’t. She needed me in that moment and, even if I wasn’t willing to admit it, I knew that I needed her too. She soothed the sharp, raw parts of me that lived within. She made me feel calmer than I had in a very long time.

“You’re safe Addy,” I whispered close to her ear. “I’ve got you now. Come back to me. Come back to your brothers. Leave all the pain. It’s not real and you’re not alone anymore.”

Eli moved forward and dropped to a crouch before her. Tentatively, he reached for her hand and wrapped it in his own as he whispered, “We’re all here, shortcake. They can’t hurt you anymore.”

Asher crouched at his brother’s side and placed his hand over both of theirs.

“We’re all here, waiting for you when you’re ready to open your eyes, little dot,” he added, the last words catching in his throat as his eyes became glassy.

“Are you sure we shouldn’t call 9-1-1?” Jordan asked quietly as he looked to Adam with concern.

“She’ll only be more terrified if she wakes up to strangers around her. She’ll be okay. Just give her some time,” I told them, sure she would come around. She was strong. I had no doubts about that.

ADDY

Heat started to seep into my body as the images continued to play on a loop, face after face and so much pain. Then there was a voice, a quiet voice that I could barely hear over the yelling and my own screaming and sobbing, but it was soft and so different from the violence I was trapped in. I thought I heard the voice tell me I was safe and I wanted to laugh. How could I be safe trapped with so many monsters who had obviously hurt me over and over again?

But the heat continued to warm me and as I got warmer and warmer the voices seemed to diminish and fade away until suddenly there was only darkness and silence.

I forced myself to take in a deeper breath and as I did it felt like something which had been trying to drag me down into darkness, suddenly released me.

My eyes flew open and I took in a huge gasp of air. My head was pounding hard and my heart was racing so fast I worried I’d had, or was in the midst of a heart attack.

I wanted to look around, but I couldn’t see through the spots in my eyes, then I remembered the faces – so many faces. Who were they? They’d hurt me, I remembered. They’d hurt me and scared me so very deeply. A sob tore from me as I fought to take in some air, then more followed. It hadn’t just been a nightmare. I knew that. Those men – those faces – they had been memories. So many monsters had laid their hands on me – violated me. Somany men had ripped shreds from my soul before or during the time the senator had me.

I felt myself being moved as I sobbed uncontrollably, but I didn’t take much notice. I was crying so hard I could barely breathe and every part of me hurt, as the realization of just how badly I had been abused, in those two years, consumed me.

I felt my body being pressed against a warm, muscular frame as strong arms enveloped me and I relaxed and rested my face against the hard chest, sure it was Asher who held me. I only sobbed harder when a large warm hand ran up and down my back, over my sweater, soothingly. It helped me to calm down and eventually I found the strength to take in a short breath and look up, ready to apologize to Asher for crying all over him.

But it wasn’t Asher’s blue eyes that met mine. There was no mistaking the mix of brown and green that swirled in the eyes I had seen for the first time the night before. I pushed myself up and studied Kane’s handsome face. He wasn’t scowling as he had been the night before and as I studied him, he even smiled a little, which only made him even better looking. His hair was messily styled just as it had been the night before and he was wearing a black polo t-shirt, so his sleeve of tattoos was on display, but I couldn’t look closely since his arm was still around me where I straddled his wide thighs now.

“K-Kane?” I sniffled.

“Sshh, don’t talk yet. Just try to slow your breathing first, okay?” he told me in that sexy, raspy tone. He looked so much less intimidating without that scowl on his face, and I found myself giving in as he held the back of my head and urged me to lay back down against him again. I lay my cheek against his hard pec, but I was stiff and tense. This was weird and I knew it. I didn’t evenknow this guy and last night I’d been petrified of him. How on earth did I end up in his lap and in his arms? And why wasn’t I fighting to get away from him?

“Just try to relax and breathe, Addy. You’re safe right here. No one can hurt you,” he told me so kindly and gently that I found myself following his directions and relaxing against him. He was so warm and firm beneath me, and he smelled amazing – woodsy and all man. Even though I didn’t know him, the way he held me and the words he said made me feel safe and relaxed and I was actually able to slow my panicked breathing as my heart rate calmed down too.

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