Page 52 of Lost in the Light

ADDY

“You know it’s kinda creepy to just watch some one sleep?” Adam uttered, his eyes not even open.

“How’d you know I’m watching you if you were asleep?” I laughed. I had in fact been watching him sleep for some time now. I hadn’t been able to stop myself when I woke up pressed against his warm body. He just looked so relaxed and peaceful when I looked over his handsome face and I hadn’t taken my eyes from it since.

“I could sense it,” he replied as he opened his eyes and looked down to where I lay over him, my head rested on my hands over his chest.

“What are you? A Jedi?”

“Nah. I’m way cooler than a lame ass Star Wars character.”

“What’s wrong with Star Wars? I happen to like those movies,” I cried with mock indignation.

“You really are a geek under all of this beauty, aren’t you?” he chuckled as he ran a hand through my wild hair and smiled softly.

“Yep, and I’m proud of the fact too.”

It had been three days since Asher and Eli had been questioned by the cops, and since then things had been a little calmer. Asher had his attorney make a formal complaint about the way all three of us had been treated by detective Harding that day at the station. The very next day the chief of police had called Asher personally, to assure him it would never happen again, and to assuage us all with the fact that detective Harding was under investigation for the whole matter. The entire case, including the arson and destruction of evidence at the house of Joseph, had been handed off to the FBI now, meaning the local police shouldn’t bother us again with the matter. Since Asher had a contact on the FBI team handling the case, he felt reassured that things would calm down again.

Asher had bounced back from the whole encounter fine. The next day he had gotten back to work. I wasn’t entirely sure what he did all day in the office at the house, but it seemed to keep him busy.

Eli was a different matter though. He refused to talk about what had happened in the police station, but whatever it was, it had shaken him badly. He was quiet when we did see him, but we’d barely had the chance to see him. For the first day he’d said he was exhausted and spent the day locked in his room at the penthouse. Then, when we’d all gotten to return home the next day, once the repairs and rebuild were complete, he’d split his time between ridiculously long sessions swimming laps in the pool in the basement level, and hiding away in his studio, painting.

He smiled in all the right places when we ate dinner together and he still fussed over me when I did see him, but he just wasn’t the Eli we all knew, and I was worried about him. Judging by how exhausted he always looked, he wasn’t sleeping and his appetiteseemed nonexistent. I knew Asher was worried too and he was continuously trying to talk with his little brother, but Eli just brushed him off every time.

“Did you sleep okay? You seemed really settled,” Adam asked.

“I was. No nightmares either,” I replied with a genuine smile. I didn’t know what was helping me more – daily video sessions with my counsellor, Laura, or the guys taking turns to sleep with me every single night, but I had been doing better over the last couple of days. I hadn’t had a nightmare for two nights now, and my anxiety had been better. I had a flashback the day before – a memory of my time, in the back rooms of that strip club – but when I came out of it I’d managed to calm myself down before anyone even noticed what was going on. By the time I went to seek out one of the guys to tell them what happened, just as I’d promised I would, I was calm again and holding it together.

I knew I had a long way to go, and tougher episodes would be ahead when worse memories returned, but I finally felt like I had a small grip on myself for the first time in so long, and it felt good.

My relationship with the guys hadn’t really progressed much, but we were all a little closer, spending more time together. Jordan and Adam were definitely touching and holding me more often. Kane was trying too, but he seemed to still find it all awkward when my brothers were around. When he had stayed with me while I slept the day before though, he had held me all night, and even kissed me a couple of times. The kisses had just been pecks, but it had still thrilled me to have him that close. Adam and Jordan had kissed my cheeks and my head, but we hadn’t shared any real kisses yet, and I definitely wanted that to happen next. It was scary though, knowing they were waitingfor my cue. The idea of taking the reins and initiating anything, terrified me. I just didn’t want to mess anything up.

“That’s what we want to hear,” Adam said happily as he leaned forward enough to kiss my forehead. “You look better this morning. You’re cheeks are all rosy,” he added with a wide smile that took my breath away. I didn’t know how it were possible, but he looked even more handsome when he smiled.

“That’s probably because I’m laid on a human hot water bottle,” I laughed.

A door slamming loud enough to rattle the walls caused me to jump, then freeze.

“Eli!” I heard Asher yell.

“I’m going to swim. We can talk later!” Eli barked back, both of them sounding pissed.

“I need to do something to get Eli to talk to me. He’s not okay and that’s stressing Asher out too,” I sighed as I rolled off of Adam and sat up on the edge of the bed.

“Good luck with that, baby. He won’t talk to anyone right now. Jordan even got him a bit drunk the other night to try and make him open up, but he didn’t get anything out of him,” Adam sighed as he sat up too.

“I have to do something.”

“We’ll talk to the others over breakfast while Eli swims and see what we can come up with. Try not to worry too much. He’ll get there,” Adam soothed as he ran his hand up and down my back. His hands were so huge just one of them covered a huge portion of my back. I loved that about him. I loved how smalland protected I felt when he held me, or even just touched me, despite the fact I was not a petite woman.

“I’ll try,” I agreed. “I should take a shower and get dressed. Are you hitting the gym?”

“Yep, then I’ll get showered too and start on breakfast. Any special requests?” he offered.

“What’s Eli’s favorite? Maybe he’ll eat more if it’s something he loves?”

“French toast. That’s a good idea. I’ll make bacon too. No one can resist the smell of bacon.” He leaned forward and kissed the top of my head, then got to his feet. “See you downstairs?”