Page 65 of Lost in the Light

“Addy?” I opened my eyes, not even realizing I’d closed them. Adam had stopped the movements of his fingers, but they still pressed against my clit as he looked to me with concern. “Do we need to stop and talk things through?” he asked.

“No. I don’t want to stop. I just…I’m not ready for us to…for you to…you know? I can’t do that…not yet,” I babbled.

“Take a nice deep breath for me, baby,” Adam coached as he dropped his hand from my core and wrapped it around my hip instead, pulling me even tighter into his front. I forced a shakybreath in and tried to calm myself down. I knew I was freaking out unnecessarily. This was Adam. He would never push me.

“Sorry,” I whispered, embarrassed.

“No. No apologies. Tell me what you need. Do you want me to step out for a few minutes?” he asked, sounding so patient and understanding, that it actually caused me pain knowing that I had doubted him. I never should have doubted he would take care of me in every single way he could.

“I want you here, with me,” I admitted. “Will you keep going? I didn’t mean to ruin it. I just…I panicked and….”

“Sshh. You didn’t ruin anything.” He wrapped his hand around the back of my head and pulled me close so he could capture my lips in a brief but tender kiss. “I’m going to carry on, okay? We’re not going to have sex. I’m just going to make you feel good. If you start to feel nervous or just want me to stop, you just tell me, yeah?”

“I c-can do that,” I agreed nervously.

“Good girl. I want you to keep your hands against the wall behind you, and your eyes on me the whole time. Do you understand?” He was asking for my acceptance but the command in his voice helped me to relax even more. Those words gave me permission to focus only on doing what he had asked of me, and I could do that.

“I understand,” I agreed with a shaky smile.

Adam’s hand glided its way back to my clit and he started to circle it again, working me higher and higher until I was beginning to pant and whine in pleasure. Then he slowly and gracefully lowered his huge body to his knees below me and I was taken aback enough to panic slightly.

“Adam?”

“Gonna make you feel better now, baby,” he said as he looked up and met my eyes again. “Just relax and trust me. Can you do that for me?” he asked, and I nodded. “Good girl. Keep your hands against the wall to steady yourself.” Before I could question what he was doing, he lifted my right leg and draped it over his shoulder, leaving me stood on one leg and my whole center open to him.

A smirk crossed his face as he looked from my center, up to me, then he lowered his face and I felt his tongue swipe over my clit, just as his finger had moments before. I cried out as little jolts of energy rushed over me in pleasure.

“Yes!” I gasped as Adam ran his tongue over my folds and teased my clit again and again, only pushing me higher and higher with need. His focus returned to my clit as I felt one of his wide fingers tease my entrance. When he pushed in, I cried out and arched up from the wall in shock at how amazing it all felt. Adam continued to lap at my clit as he pushed his finger into me, pumping in and out. Sensations I had never known built inside of me.

I was panting Adam’s name over and over as I tried to keep my eyes on him, watching as the muscles in his arms, shoulders, and across his back rippled and tensed with every movement. He curled his finger inside of me, hitting a massively sensitive area, as he sucked mercilessly over my clit, and all at once pleasure crashed over me, wave after wave drowning me until I could hardly get a breath in.

My leg gave from under me and I started to slide down the wall, but Adam was able to catch me and ease me into his lap where he still knelt on the floor of the shower beneath me. I held ontohis arm where it wrapped around me as the waves ebbed and the high calmed enough for me to come back to reality.

When I forced my eyes open I was cradled in Adam’s arms and his eyes were the first thing I saw, watching me with a relaxed expression on his face.

“That was…” I uttered tiredly. “That’s never happened to me before. It was amazing.”

“You never came before?” Adam asked with surprise.

“I have now,” I said with a sigh of contentment.

“You’re okay? I didn’t push too far?” he worried.

“I’m very okay,” I assured him as I snuggled even closer into him. It wasn’t until I wiggled a little to get more settled that I felt his hard length beneath me. I gulped at how big it felt and forced myself to look up to him. “Should I do something…I mean for you? We can’t…you know? But I could touch you? I should, right?” I stuttered anxiously.

“Baby, relax. You shouldn’t do anything but stay in my arms looking as cute as you did a moment ago. I’m fine. This was about you, not that I didn’t enjoy every second of it too,” he chuckled. “You’re so damned adorable when you get all shy and embarrassed.”

“This is just all really new to me. One relationship, remember?” I reminded him. “And it was never like this. I’m not sure how things work.”

“They work however we want them to work. There’s no set plan or rules to follow. As long as we both enjoy what we do together, that’s all that matters, and I’m going to enjoy teaching you somenew things along the way,” he added with a grin. “Come on. Let’s get you cleaned up before the hot water runs out.”

“Thank you,” I told him as I looked up at him. “For giving me that. I never thought…never even imagined I could do that; not after everything. Thank you for giving me a piece of myself back.” I was tearful as he leaned down and placed soft, sensual kisses on my lips.

“You’re welcome, Addy, but this is just the beginning. We’re going to help you get more pieces back, and we’re going to help you find new sides of yourself too. You’re going to be just fine, baby. Jord, Kane, and I won’t allow it to be any other way.”

I was emotional as I clung to him. I had no idea if they could really do that, or at least help me to do it myself, but I really wished they could.

CHAPTER 19

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