Page 6 of A Spark in the Ash

“I think you know that all those things aren’t enough, though,” I say, my voice soft. “Those things do not equate to love.”

His eyes rise to meet mine. “How do you know what that even is?”

I see it in his eyes. He’s asking, because he truly wants to know.

“Love…” I trail off. Jaxon and I have never said those three words to each other. There was so little time. And I think we were both a little uncertain. But I can feel it in my chest. I feel it eating up my soul. It was proven in my reckless actions. “Love can make you do crazy things,” I say, speaking the truth that is expanding my chest. “It makes you think in illogical ways sometimes. It burns you up and consumes you. It’s what makes risking everything, worth it.”

We’re both quiet for a moment after that. We’re staring at each other, the two of us lost in our own thoughts. It’s a lot to process, a lot to evaluate.

“I’ve never felt that, Serena,” Ascelin finally says. His voice comes out a little hoarse, quiet. “It’s always just been fighting and war and trying to survive. I thought we could make a good team. But that…” He shakes his head. “If that is what you have with that ultralight…” He squeezes his eyes closed and shakes his head again, as if just saying the word is difficult. “Then I can’t be angry with you.” Once more, he opens his eyes, staring into my core. He’s sincere right now. “I just might be a little envious of what you’ve found.”

I try to force a smile onto my lips. “You’re immortal, Ascelin. I think you have time to find her. She’s got to be out there somewhere. She’s waiting just for you.”

There’s hope in his expression, but also doubt.

I don’t know what I’m promising. Because surely thereissomeone out there for him. But where is she? Back home in the DarkVerse? Or what if more than one darkling is to fall for someone here in the LightVerse?

“Thank you, Serena,” he says. His voice is tight, but I can feel his confidence returning. “I know I’ve been a massive prick lately. You didn’t have to be so nice about this.”

“I think anyone calling me nice would be a stretch, don’t you think?” I joke.

He smirks and laughs. He arches an eyebrow, agreeing with me without saying the words. “But, I think I get it now. I mean, I don’t, because I just want to kill him, and he wants to kill me. But I get it. You won’t have any more shit about him from me.”

A weight lifts from my chest. And I realize that maybe I do care what others think about me, just a little. Renwick’s patience has meant so much to me. Getting Ascelin’s apology and clearance is a whole different level. “Thank you,” I say.

He just shrugs and looks away, trying to break the weight of the moment. “I did notice that when he saw me with you that he was able to move without trying to obliterate everything. I think I might have an idea.”

I don’t knowif this is a good idea. Ireallydon’t know if this is a good idea.

Jaxon is a reactionary man. He’s a man who’s beaten people, run with criminals, and once shot a man between the eyes for kidnapping his girl.

Ireallydon’t know if this is a good idea.

My eyes slide to Ascelin’s and he just gives me a nod.

I walk down the hall, and everything rolls into motion.

“Serena,” Ascelin calls to me as soon as I step into the edge of the view of the vault.

Just like we talked about, I turn, pausing my step.

Ascelin walks up to me, playing the casual part with ease. “Why do you keep doing this to yourself? It’s obvious he’s never going to get control. It’s time to let this go.”

My stomach clenches. My hands shake.

“Don’t,” I say as I shake my head. “Don’t make this harder than it is.”

Right on cue, Ascelin reaches forward and grabs my hand. His grasp is gentle, tender. “Relationships aren’t supposed to be this hard, Serena.”

A sonic bellow drags my eyes to the vault for the first time since this charade began.

Jaxon is standing with his hands pressed to the glass, his face close to it. His jaw is clenched hard, and he breathes raggedly through his nostrils.

His eyes are fixed on Ascelin, and if looks could kill, Ascelin would be dead yesterday.

“You really thinkthatis ever going to work?” Ascelin asks with venom in his voice as he glares Jaxon down.

I watch, letting the question hang in the air for a moment.

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