Page 42 of The Rule of 3

After hours and hours of speeches, thanks, hugs, and phone calls from friends and family who weren’t in Honeybee Hollow, the three of them finally headed back to the mayor’s residence. It had been Tanner’s home for so long, he felt a little nostalgic suddenly. “I wonder if I ought to sell this place or just rent it out,” he mused as they wandered down the hall to the bedroom. “Well, I don’t have to decide tonight—that‘s for sure.”

Since they all smelled pretty strongly of champagne, showers were in order. But by the time Tanner and Eli made it into the bed, Zoë was already passed out in the middle. It was nearly four-thirty in the morning.

“I think she has the right idea,” sighed Eli. He kissed Tanner, climbed in next to Zoë and passed out as well.

Tanner had a little more trouble falling asleep. His mind was full of the events of the day. He’d received a congratulatory phone call from the White House, for heaven’s sake! And soon he’d be inaugurated asgovernor. He had Zoë and he had Eli in his life forever. There just weren’t any more blessings he could imagine for himself.

He was so wrong, though. Life always has more blessings in store.

Snuggling as close to Zoë as he could, he reached across her to snag a part of Eli and finally found sleep.

Chapter 36

As scheduled, they took off to visit the governor’s mansion two days later. Just as Zoë and Tanner remembered from their school days, the house was incredible. It was filled room by room with priceless antiques and artwork. Zoë cringed inside thinking of having a toddler running through a house like this. The upper floors, however, were a lot homier, and she felt a bit more like she could breathe easily when they toured through the vast living areas.

The first lady was all gracious smiles and encouraging words as she introduced everyone to the staff, and she kindly hosted a small lunch for them so they could also appreciate the quality of the chef’s work. She seemed to beam with pride over everything, and there was an air of nostalgia about her that let you know immediately that her eight years as Kentucky’s first lady had been the pinnacle of her life so far and she’d sorely miss it. She had a good thirty years on them age-wise.

After a couple of hours, they took their leave. All three of them had been cordial and receptive, but when they got into the limo, they all let loose spectacularly and simultaneously.

“No way in hell!” cried Tanner. “That place is not for us. We need todosomething.”

“Ugh,” Zoë moaned. “I feel like I’d be a prisoner in the top tower of a castle just waiting to be let out. And that food! Gross. Who eats like that anyway?”

Laughing and holding his stomach, Eli promised, “Don’t worry, you two. I’ve been suspecting your reactions and I have something to show you.” He gave an address to the driver who took them not too far away.

“Not all governors live in the prescribed mansions,” he explained. “In fact, you’d have to pay to live in it. The mansion can be staffed and kept for state functions, so you’ll still be expected to host events there. Kentucky is especially known for special performances and affairs, but the content is completely up to you. You can hold rock concerts or dance performances, movie screenings—whatever suits you. Or nothing at all if you’re shy—though that won’t endear you to many of your supporters who’d love to be invited to some swanky events now and then.” Just then, the limo pulled through an electronic gate in a tall brick wall and came to a stop in front of a beautiful property on the outskirts of Frankfort. “Take a look at this place. I bought it for you as a congratulatory gift.” He looked between their astonished faces with a wink. “Just in case. If you don’t like it, I’ll just sell it again.”

“Eli!” Zoë gasped. She jumped out and took in the sight of a huge house on a couple of tree-filled acres. There was a carriage house on one side that was larger than most regular houses, and the architecture of the place was stunning. It was a true southern mansion and there was a warm, inviting air about it. She couldn’t believe how beautiful it was.

Clearing his throat, Tanner looked at Eli. “You’re amazing. Just look at how excited she is here, and she hasn’t even seen the inside yet. You knew, didn’t you, Eli? That she’d need a real house and not some historical monument to live in.” They watched as Zoë wandered through the property looking at flower beds and obviously imagining what they’d look like when the spring came. Her face glowed with joy. “I can’t thank you enough, Eli.” He leaned forward and whispered in Eli’s ear, “I want to kiss you so badly right now.” Pulling back, he locked eyes with Eli. They didn’t always need words for what they needed to communicate.

“Well, let’s see the indoors too, shall we?” Eli responded with a proud but shy smile. She strode to the front door and quickly opened it with a key.

Indoors was even better. Sunlight poured in, making everything gleam. It was colorful and warm, and even though the place was huge, it felt like a family home. Their home.

“Since I’m taking on the job as Chief of Staff, no one will bat an eye at me living in the carriage house.” As Zoë and Tanner’s heads whipped around to face him with incredulous looks, he laughed. “But I think we’ll just let the public believe that. I’ve spoken to Chef Oscar about actually moving into it with his husband Dante. And…” he paused for drama, “Dante, as it turns out, has a very strong background and glowing references as a manny.”

“Wonderful! You’ll love Oscar’s food, Zoë. I promise,” Tanner declared with a wide grin.

“When can we move in? We kind of need furniture though…” Zoë asked as she gawked from room to room. “What’s the master bedroom like?” Now and then she’d stop dead in her tracks and exclaim, “Look at this! Wow.” She was currently surveying the enormous professional grade kitchen with every appliance she’d ever dreamed of on shiny display.

Eli chuckled and put his arm around Zoë’s waist. “I’ve had Caro working with a designer for a couple of weeks, and they have some plans for you to approve. Best case scenario would be in three weeks, if you’d like.”

Zoë’s chin dropped and she started to laugh. “No wonder Caro’s been asking me so many oddball questions lately about favorite colors and what kind of sheets I like to sleep on. I just told her, ‘clean ones.’” She looked lovingly at Tanner and Eli, “You guys, this is going to be amazing. Now let’s see the bedroom!”

* * *

At the same time as they were all losing their minds over the exquisite house Eli had procured for them, in another part of the state Caro Whittaker was hard at work on a different project. She had made arrangements with Tanner’s Uncle Fred Lassiter to pose as a news crew and meet with him at Smelzer’s distillery. It was time to deal with that man once and for all.

Flanked by a sound engineer, cameraman, and a lighting guy, Caro exuded all of the right vibes as a self-important reporter as she and Uncle Fred followed Smelzer into his tasting room. Caro barked a few orders and kept an eye out for Smelzer and what he could see. The man was so full of himself he was basically frothing at the mouth as he poured generous glasses full of whatever the hell he was trying to foist off as low-cal, gluten-free bourbon. His wife Payslee seemed to flutter around him like a deranged moth. She bumped into Smelzer a few times with her enormous boobage, causing him to spill the liquor. Each time that happened, she let out a self-conscious giggle that had Smelzer glaring at her.

Finally, the lights were set, the mics were live, and drinks were handed out. Caro announced into her mic in front of the cameraman, “I’m here today with Fred Lassiter, a long-time member of the prestigious Kentucky Distillers’ Association. He’s here to discuss membership with Payslee Distillers.” Looking at Smelzer she said, “Colonel, I understand this is a big day for you and something you’ve been working toward for a while now. Tell us a little about how your bourbon is going to offer people something new.”

Puffing out his chest, Smelzer began a long-winded explanation about gluten-free and low calories. Payslee took a slosh of her drink and smacked her lips approvingly as her husband spoke. He didn’t get very far into his diatribe, however, when the sounds of choking and retching came from Uncle Fred. The camera swung to Fred’s red face.

“Jesus Christ, man! You call this shitbourbon?”he hollered. “What’s the matter with you?”

Then, just to make things even more exciting, Payslee started screaming her stupid head off. She clutched her husband and thrust him in front of her as she shrieked, “Daddy! A rat! There’s a rat in the food!” And sure enough, amidst the fruit, cheeses and fancy crackers, a big, healthy brown rat had taken up residence and was happily snacking away on the goodies set out for him. Two more of his buddies then hopped up onto the table to help out, and Payslee ran screeching from the tasting room.

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