Page 43 of The Rule of 3

Smelzer’s eyes narrowed as he glared at Uncle Fred. “We don’t have a fucking rat problem in this distillery. What’s going on here?”

“Well, you also don’t seem to havebourbonin this distillery if this is what you want us to promote for you,” Fred said as he wiped his chin. “I suggest you abandon the project or bring someone in who knows what they’re doing. This is an abomination!”

“I thought that sneaky little nephew of yours was making sure I was approved!” Smelzer shot back at him. “This was just a joke to him all along, wasn’t it?” He turned to Caro and announced, “Would your TV station like a real scoop about our new pansy-ass governor? You know he’s a flamin’queer? I have proof! All that posing with his nice little wife is nothing but a big fat lie. He’s been boning that pretty boyfriend of his for years.” With that, Smelzer ran out of the room, forgetting to close the door behind him.

One of the rats took off down the hall, and Caro couldn’t help snort. “He’s going to have a rat problem now. That one looks pregnant.” Quickly, however, she schooled her expression back into one of interest as Smelzer reappeared holding a digital camera in his hands.

Triumphantly, he ordered, “Take a look at this!” He thrust the camera into Caro’s hand.

Looking at him quizzically, she asked, “What do you want me to do with this?”

“Look at the fucking pictures inside! Do I have to spell it out?”

The battery was dead, but a quick word with her cameraman got things hooked up to a power source. She turned it on and looked in the viewfinder for a second. “There’s nothing there.”

“Yes, there is. Keep lookin’, you idiot!” Smelzer cried.

Taking a deep breath and leveling Smelzer with a stare, Caro flipped over the camera and opened the door to the memory card. “Nope. Nothing. Sorry to disappoint you.”

“What did you do to it? Did you erase it or somethin’? I’ll sue your ass if you did!” Smelzer carried on and on with spittle flying out of his lips.

Uncle Fred stepped in and calmly took the camera from Caro. “I suggest you mind your manners, Mr. Smelzer. We were all standing here and saw exactly the same thing our cameraman recorded. Nothing has been done to this digital camera.” Gaining in volume, he continued, “Now, don’t you even dream of trying to blackmail a member of my family ever again! Tanner told me to tell you that the law in Kentucky prohibits the marriage between an uncle and niece, and the penalty forincestcan be from one year tolife in prisonif prosecuted. Hewillsee to it you’re prosecuted if you try to come after anyone he cares about again. So, take this travesty of a liquor you’ve created and shove it up your ass!” He turned away to help the crew disassemble their equipment quickly so they could get out of there, but just as they were heading out the door, he turned to Smelzer once again. The old man had a blank look on his face as Fred asked with a disgusted frown, “What kind of a sick fuck marries his own niece? And you want to accusegay peopleof being perverted?” He shook his head and marched out the door muttering to himself about bigots and weirdos.

As soon as they were on their way far, far from Payslee Distillery, Caro typed out a message to Eli.

Caro: Mission accomplished :) Tell Tanner that Uncle Fred is The Best. Oh, and the “crew” all signed their NDAs. I haven’t had this much fun in ages!

Chapter 37

A few days before the inauguration, Tanner, Zoë, Eli, and Caro were all invited to the Lassiters’ house for Tanner’s birthday. Dr. Lassiter, as it seemed, had a very special gift for his son to celebrate turning thirty… and becoming governor.

Mrs. Lassiter ushered them all into the living room and made sure they were comfortable while her husband went to the other end of the house for something.

When he returned, he presented Tanner with a large basket festooned with an enormous pink bow on top. “Happy birthday, Tanner,” he said quietly. “Her name is Maisie.”

Up popped a sleepy head of a Black and Tan Coonhound—Tanner’s favorite dog of all time. Her ears were so long, they seemed to go on forever, but it was the sweetness of her wise expression that melted Tanner immediately. “Thank you, Daddy. She’s fantastic! How old is she? Where’d you get her?”

Chuckling, Dr. Lassiter explained he’d been working with the breeder for years and was thrilled to know she’d be having a litter at just the right time for Tanner. “She’s twelve weeks old, and… wow. She is a smart one, son. You’re going to have a ball with this little girl.”

“Little” was relative, of course. Tanner took in the size of Maisie’s enormous paws and knew instantly she’d be at least a sixty- to seventy-pound dog. He carefully plucked her out of the basket and snuggled her up to his face. She gave him a kiss and settled in like he was her new home.

“Maisie, you know what?” Tanner crooned at her. “You’re going to be Kentucky’s First Dog. So, we’ll have to mind our manners.”

Right away Zoë scooted over to get in some snuggles, and then everyone started passing her around. Maisie was obviously confident, well-socialized, and quite calm. She seemed perfect.

“We have a bunch of supplies, including a crate for you to take home, so your transition ought to be pretty seamless,” Mrs. Lassiter explained. “She really is special. We’ve had her here for two days, and I’m going to miss her.”

Maisie, as well as all of her humans, moved into the new house in Frankfort. Chef Oscar and Dante were already ensconced happily in the carriage house on the property, and when Dante met Maisie, he exclaimed, “Well, y’all don’t have a baby for me to care for quite yet, so I’ll have to practice on this beautiful little girl.” He took to his duties with a vengeance, giving everyone a great sense that he’d make the best manny ever when the time came. He also filled in around the house in whatever capacity he was needed. Eli’s first hires were working out splendidly.

Now that the election was over, Eli expected his sister to head back to New York. “When do you plan to go, Caro?” he asked on the eve of the inauguration.

Caro looked at him with a serious expression and asked, “Does it bother you that I’m here?”

“Heavens, no! I love having you around,” he answered honestly.

“Enough to find me a permanent position with Tanner’s staff? Or maybe something for Zoë?” She looked slightly embarrassed. “The fact is, Eli, I always thought New York was the be-all, end-all, but I’ve enjoyed every minute I’ve spent here in Kentucky. I don’t want to leave, and I love all of my new friends. They seem… real.”

And so, it was decided, much to Zoë’s delight, that Caro would stay on as a personal assistant to the First Lady. It was a catch-all job that wasn’t all that different from what she’d been doing all along, and it made both of them as happy as can be. Caro also bought herself a house nearby and had as much fun furnishing it as she had with the governor’s new place. With this one, she was able to take her time a bit more, however.