Page 115 of Game on, Love

“You’re absolutely ridiculous,” She huffed out as more angry tears trailed down her face. I pressed my lips together, unsure how to help her, my heart breaking at the sight of her.

After another minute, she stilled, and when I knew she wouldn’t try to leave again, I brought my hand up. “Are you done fighting me?”

Challenge flared in her eyes as she shook her head. “No. I don’t get this. You should be with him. I don’t get why you’re wasting your time being here.”

The surety in her words made me stop. “Okay. Let’s get one thing clear. I’m not wasting my time by being here. You’re right; I do want to spend time with him, but choosing to be here with you right now is not me giving up on something with him.”

“But—”

“If anything, I’m pretty sure if I went back home right now and left you alone, he’d be the first one to drag me back here.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. You want to know why? Because he knows what you mean to me.” Raina stilled at my words. “The one thing he told me was how I needed to live my life while I was there for him. He didn’t want me to choose between anything and him, and he especially didn’t want me to stop my life for him. I didn’t get that, and that was why it took me so long to even step back mentally in my game. I didn’t know what he really meant because to me, being there with him should’ve been my priority, but he just said that when I found that thing in my life that would change the meaning of living for me, I would know and staying home with him wouldn’t be how I found it. He’s like you in that regard; not selfish enough for me to stay in his chaos.”

“Oliver…” She shook her head as I caressed her cheek.

“But I’m asking you to be. Do you think my place in this world is next to him or on the pitch? No. It’s right next to you. I want to be there for him, but I want to do it with you withme. I want to play the best I can, but I want to do it with you cheering for me.” Her breath hitched slightly at my words. “So, no, I’m not wasting my time by being here with you, and it certainly wouldn’t matter to me if you took years to find your peace after what happened or share your heart with me because, from the moment I saw you, I’d known that my heart was meant for yours.”

“It’s not that easy,” She whispered, and I let myself finally smile at her.

“I don’t want it to be easy. I want to fight for youandfight with you, even if it’s with the voice in your head and win you over and over. I want to show you that when I’m being pulled in different directions, being with you is a choice I made because I want to. I want to hold your hand and pull you up when it feels like you’re drowning. You want to know why?” I whispered. “Because finding you in a sea of strangers was my favourite thing in the world. Each time I feel that tug in my heart, and I know I can find you in a heartbeat, I know each one leading up to it was worth it. But we can’t just not try because of… life. And we certainly can’t not try because someone else made you feel like you’re not worth to have around, because to me there hasn’t been a single person who has felt more worth it than you.”

Her eyes softened at my words, as she stared at me.

“And you say you’ve been dreaming me,” She whispered, her voice trembling.

“Because you are everything I could have ever imagined and more.”

She shook her head; at first, what I thought was disagreement, but her words were what surprised me. “I don’t even think I could’ve been brave enough to dream of you.”

The rawness of her words hit me in my chest, and as her shoulders sagged, I realised she was finally accepting this... us.

Placing a kiss on her forehead, I replied honestly. “You didn’t have to. I’d already been made just for you.”

She stared at me for a beat before placing a hand on my face and closing the distance as she placed her lips on mine.

Pulling back, she took a breath as she wiped her face.

“You want to tell me now what happened?” I asked, brushing a hair from her face.

She nodded, but before she could say anything, a voice interrupted us.

35

Raina

MY WHOLE BODY ACHEDas Oliver unlocked the front door. Dev walked in first before we both followed him inside.

Without saying a single word, he climbed up the stairs, presumably to Vedant’s room. I tried offering mine, butthatwas a sharp no.

“Is he okay?” Oliver asked in a low voice behind me, and I shrugged.

“I don’t know.”

My plan had always been to travel back up later tonight. I knew I wouldn’t be able to read all of Ma’s journals, but I only ever wanted to read one. I needed to know if she had known about… everything, and from what I’d gathered from my father, she had. But after Dev interrupted us, he’d simply said he needed to get away from the house, and I couldn’t exactly blame him. After everything that went down, I wouldn’t have wanted to stay in the same vicinity as our father either. So, we drove back with Oliver; who even though had plans to come later in the week, drove us because he didn’t want either of us to drive back alone like this.

It had been a silent ride, though Oliver had spent most of it sending glances in my direction, almost as if he wanted to remind me that he was there. But I couldn’t help go over everything again, and at how detached I felt. As I stared at the cloudy skies, I wondered if I’d been broken by him so many times that not a single part of it felt like a surprise anymore. Just numb.

---