Page 14 of Inevitable Secrets

“Um, well, that’s good to hear,” Taylor watched as the man left the monitor, walked over to the machine pumping air in and out of Derrick’s lungs, and touched some buttons. “Uh, doctor, what exactly are you doing?” Taylor asked the man who had retreated into himself just as quickly as he had come in.

“I am adjusting the settings on this ventilator so that Mr. Fletcher here can exercise his lungs,” the doctor clarified, completely focused on what he was doing.

“Exercise them for what specifically?” Taylor asked with some concern.

“To breathe on his own,” the man said as though this were the most obvious answer. He finally looked at Taylor as if she was delusional and then left the room as quickly as he had come in.

Taylor looked at the door the man had exited, then at Derrick, still fast asleep, and finally at Henry who just shook his head and shrugged with an equally baffled expression on his face.

A nurse entered the room, took one look at Taylor, and shook her head. “Based upon the baffled and horrified expression on your face I can tell that Dr. M has already graced you with his presence,” she said. “I’m Polly, Mr. Fletcher’s nurse today.”

“Uh, yeah, hi,” Taylor said, still in a fog. She shook her head, “I’m sorry. Hello, I’m Taylor.”

“Hi there. So let me just explain what the heck is happening here. Mr. Fletcher is doing well. His x-ray is clear and his blood work shows he doesn’t really need to have the tube to help him breathe anymore. So Dr. M has adjusted the settings on the ventilator to allow Mr. Fletcher to exercise his lungs. He can breathe on his own with the tube in and then we can check and see if we can take the breathing tube out of him today.”

Taylor felt her stomach knot up with anxiety. “Is he ready to do this on his own?”

“He is,” Polly assured her. “It is better for him to have it out. The longer it’s in the more issues associated with it. Of course, we will monitor him as he is weaning from the ventilator, and if he gets too tired the machine will kick in.” She walked over to the IV pumps around Derrick’s bed. “I am going to start lowering his sedation, so he may start moving more, start waking up a bit. But from what I hear you are more soothing to him than we are so if you could stay close by, I would appreciate it.”

“No worries there, I’m not going to leave him,” Taylor promised.

“Yes, based on what I’ve heard it seems you two have a great bond,” the nurse said smiling at Taylor. “Oh, and don’t worry, the surgery didn’t interfere with his tattoo.”

“Tattoo?” Taylor said.

“Yes, it is near the surgical site but it didn’t ruin it,” Polly said. Someone from the desk called out to Polly, and she leaned out the door. “Shoot, I have to take that call. I will be right back but just flag me down if you have any questions.”

Baffled, Taylor stood and leaned over her husband. He had stray lines left here and there on his side from where he had been tattooed. He had said he had gotten rid of the big chunk of it but left the stray lines to remind him of what he had been through and how far he had come. Also because the removal, as he had described it, “hurt like having your balls kicked and set on fire.”

Taylor pulled the horrible hospital gown aside and scanned the side of his chest, looking around the small bandages. And then she saw something. Something she had thought was leftover, just some scratches, but when she got a little closer, she saw it was tiny, drawn out cursive in gray ink. The tattooAlways Taylorwas tucked under his well-defined chest muscle.

“Fuck, Derrick,” Taylor muttered and then rested her head on his arm. She felt him move and quickly picked herself up. “It’s okay babe, it’s okay.” He relaxed at her words. She brought her hand to his face, leaned down and kissed his wrinkled brow and watched it smooth. She would keep him safe. Everyone she had left would be safe, she vowed.

Because, always.

Five

Derrick felta sharp sting in his wrist and he jolted and tried to shout, but there was something in his throat. He coughed but it wouldn’t clear so he reached up to pull it out. But he was stopped.

“Derrick, you have to leave that in a little longer,” the sweetest voice said.

Derrick pushed up his eyelids, fighting the weights that held them down and looked into beautiful blue eyes.

He tried to say her name, but it just made him cough more.

“It’s okay, it’s just a tube to help you breathe, babe.” The way she said it he was sure was supposed to soothe him but it only made him panic more, alarmed that he needed a tube to help him breathe. “It’s coming out soon, okay? You are doing so well. I promise I will explain everything. Just give me a few minutes, please,” she pleaded.

Derrick was a sucker for anything Taylor wanted so he gave a small nod in reply. Derrick watched as a tear slid down her cheek. He reached up and wiped it, his forehead scrunched with concern.

“I was scared,” she admitted. “So scared you wouldn’t wake up. I love you so much,” she choked out and laid her head on his chest to cry, one of her hands snaking up to touch his cheek, the other holding his arm.

Derrick pulled his arm free, and wove both arms around his wife. His chest hurt like someone had just kicked him but he didn’t care because the feeling of Taylor crushed to him was better than any painkiller.

* * *

It feltlike three years later to Derrick, but finally they removed that horrible tube. The first thing out of his mouth was, “I love you always, Taylor,” and he watched her dissolve into a puddle and cry. Taylor started to kiss him on his cheeks, his lips, his eyes, and his forehead. All the while she said, “I love you” to him over and over again.

A thousand kisses later, Taylor pulled back and looked at him, just smiling, her eyes coated in tears.

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