Page 188 of Burn the Wild

“Me?” She considers the question. “I feel like I’m a constant, screaming panic attack.”

“You don’t care if you live or die, do you?” I ask, thinking of her on that bull and wondering if anyone else has put it together.

Fallon goes still. So still, I’m uncertain if she heard me. Then, in a low voice, she rasps, “No. I don’t.”

“Fallon—”

“I fucked my sister’s abusive ex-boyfriend.” Her face twists in disgust. “Who does that?” She spits the words. “That asshole took everything from me. My head hurts all the time. I lost a year riding bulls. I lost—” Her gaze flicks to the window where Wyatt scowls in a corner.

“It isn’t your fault,” I say quietly.

“I can’t get him out of my head. It’s like…like a spot.” Fallon points at a place beneath her chest. “Right here. Sharp and painful and it doesn’t go away. Even when I sleep. Riding reckless is the only way to get it out.”

“Mine was there.” I point above my head. “Like a hole.”

Fallon inclines her head. “Is it still there?”

“Yes,” I say softly. “But it’s smaller now.”

There’s no cure for that black hole—not love, not the ranch. Maybe my depression will be less here, or maybe it won’t. But Ford will be there with me every step of the way, reminding me I can save myself, like I’ve done this entire summer.

“Have you talked to anyone?” I nod at the window where Dakota dances with Davis. “Your sister?”

Fallon shakes her head, her eyes glazed. “No. I don’t want to bring her down with my bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit. They’re your family. They love you.”

A hesitant smile curves her lips, as if believing it hurts too much.

She turns to look at me. In the inky darkness, her face is a shadow. “Did leaving your life behind work out for you?”

I recall her question from our first meeting. Now, I finally have an answer.

“Best thing I ever did.”

She bites the inside of her cheek, considering me. “Leaving, huh?”

I inhale. Exhale. “It’s okay to go. To move when you need to run.” I smile. “It’s okay to stay, too. Maybe talk to the people who love you a lot.”

She lets out a small laugh, a little shakier than usual.

We both jump when there’s a bang on the window.

Ford.

He gestures for me to come inside, a goofy smile on his face. Then he breathes on the window and draws a heart in the fog.

Fallon chuckles softly. “Another Montgomery man pathetically in love.” She sounds both amused and disgusted. “Nice going, Reese.”

We laugh.

Thunder rumbles overhead.

Fallon ashes her smoke and stamps it out beneath her boot. A wicked smile tilts her lips. “So do we get drunk and commit even more feral acts tonight?”

A sunrise lifting in my heart, I link my arm through hers. “Most definitely, yes.”

“Never thought you had it in you,” Davis says from his barstool.

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