Page 105 of The Dragon Queen

Becauseit'sbattered.JustlikeIam.

Butit'snotbroken.

AndneitheramI.

"No,"Ibreathe.Myownvoicesweepsoutintotheair,deepandresonantinawaythat'sunfamiliarandyettrue.Thundercrackswithinmychest.

Idon'tknowwhereIamorwhoIam;Idon'tknowifthemeninfrontofmearereal.

ButIknowonething.

"It'smine."

Ipressthebeatingmassoffleshtotheverycenterofmychest,anditmergeswithme,becomingapartofme--ormaybethat'sjustwhereitwasmeanttobeallalong.

Darkpurplewavesoflightexplodeoutwardfromtheplacewheremyhandsareclaspedagainstmyribs.Thegroundshakes.

Inashudderingjolt,theworldbeginstodisintegratearounditsedges,blackcracksappearingintheceilingsandthewalls.

"No,"Jianyuroars,butit'snothisvoice.Hisheadvibratesinandoutofclarityinmyvision,andthenit'sMalik,shouting, "Whatdoyouthinkyou'redoing?"

"WhatIshouldhavedonefromthebeginning,"Ireply,theAirDragonmansioncrumblingallaroundme,revealingadarkskyandblackrock.

Malik'sfaceviolentlytearsapart,leavingRafe'sinitsplace,andisthiswhat'sbeenhappeningthisentiretime?

"You'renoqueen,"Rafe'sfacespits,butIrecognizethevoice.

Andit'sdefinitelynotmymate's.

Theillusionissoclearnow.Blacksmokeswirlsinputridgusts,envelopingthemanstandingbeforeme.

Iwanttolaugh.Thatstupid,ancienttextIwasreadinglastnightinthelibrary,whenIshouldhavebeensleeping.

Preyuponyourtarget'sdeepestfears--forthebestillusiontodestroytheirwillisonetheyweavethemselves.

That'swhat'sbeenhappeninghere.TheShadowKingtrappedmeinacageofmyownmaking,thebarsbuiltofinsecurityandfear.Myworriesaboutbeingnothingwithoutmagic.Myuncertaintyaboutmymates,andiftheyeverwouldhavelovedmewithouttheShadowBracerdrawingustogether.

Butnoneofitwasreal.

Thesmokecoalescesintoatwisted,plasticimpressionofStorm. "You'renothing,"hefumes.

Andthatone--thathaspower.Onceuponatime,Stormsaidthosewordstome,andtheynearlybrokemyspirit.

ButIknowthetruthnow.

Theentiretyofmytimewithmymateswashesoverme,theillusionshatteringandleavingonlyrealitybehind.Jianyu,Rafe,Malik,StormandImayhavebeenbroughttogetherbymagicanddestiny,butwhatwebuiltfromthatrawlumberismorethananyonecouldhavepossiblyimagined.I'vecometoknowthem,andtheyknowme--everypartofme.Theyloveme,exactlyasIam.

AndnotjustbecauseI'mtheDragonQueen.

Theylovemebecause...

"I'mjustme,"Ibreathe.

Withthat,anotherwaveofbrilliant,whitelightburstsforth,meltingevenmoreofErembour'sspell.Myhairstandsonend,andI'mrisingtomyfeet,windwhippingmyclothes.

TheCrownOfCindersfloatsupandoutofmyhands,spinningintheair,itsblackmetalsurfaceglowing.Thedarknessfallsawayfromit,revealingglitteringgoldandsilverandapurelightthat'snearlyblinding.

Thecircletsettlesonmyhead,andbothdarknessandbrillianceflowovermetogetherinarush.TheShadowBracerburns,turninggleamingblackagain.Rhiannon'snecklaceandRook'sringignitewithpurplefire,andthesheerweightofsomuchmagicisnearlytoomuchtobear.

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