Page 31 of The Dragon Queen

Becausethat'swhatshe'sproposing.She'llstayhereandtrainwithRookandRhiannon,andwe'lleachsneakbackintoourrespectivekingdomstofindothersympathizers--dragonswhoarewillingtojoinusinourfighttostoptheShadowKing.

Jianyu'sjawflexes. "AsmuchasIhatetoadmitit,Rafehasapoint."Ahintofvulnerabilityseepsintohisgaze. "Idon'tlikebeingawayfromyouanymorenowthanIdidbefore."

"NeitherdoI."Sheglancesaroundattherestofus. "Youknowthat."

"Ofcoursewedo,"Iagree.

Evenwhenwe'reapartforafewhours,there'sapullattheinsideofmychest.Idon'tbreatherightuntilmymateisclosetomeagain.Iknowit'sthesameforherasitisforme.

Shesmilesatmeinappreciationbeforehermouthevensbackoutagain.ShefixesherattentiononRafe. "WhenIrefusedtobeseparated,wewerefreshlymated--andyoutwowerebasicallyconstantlytryingtokilleachother."

"Lightlymaim,"Rafemuttersincorrection,asifthatmakesallthatbigofadifference.

Sherollshereyesandbarrelson. "Ourbondwasn'tstrongenoughtowithstandanyserioustimeapart."Shelookstouseachinturnwithpleadinginhereyes. "Butaftereverythingwe'vebeenthrough...everythingwe'veshared...Can'tyoufeelit?Nothingcouldseparateusnow.Notathousandmilesorahundredyears."

"Thatdoesn'tmeanIwouldliketotryit,"Malikinterjects.

"Whatotherchoicedowehave?"sheasks,ourbondjitteringwiththestraininsideher.

AndIhatethis.Ihatethatwehavetomakethesekindsofdecisions--thatwe'refacedwiththiskindofevil.

Ihatethatherdestinyweighsonherthewayitdoes.Ihatethatsheisn'tfreetochoosewhat’sbestforher.Whatwouldmakeherhappy.

Butthatdestinybroughtustogether.Ican'tquestionit.

Iwon'tquestionher.

"Idon'twanttoleaveyou."Ireachforherhand,andsheletsmetakeit.Irelishthecontact,soakinginthefeelingofherwarmpalmagainstmine.

I'mgoingtomissit.

"But,"Icontinue,preemptingtheothersbeforetheycanmisunderstandwhatI'mtryingtosay. "Itrustyou."

Itrustinherleadership--andinherheart.

"Itrusther,too,"Rafeprotests. "Just--"

Iignorehim,staringintomymate'seyes. "Ifyoureallythinkthisisright,thenIsupportyou."

Sheblinks,asheenappearinginhergaze. "Iamagiant,never-endingpitofself-doubt,"sheadmits.Shedartsglancesatherotherthreemates. "Seriously,ifanyofyouhaveabetterplan,I'mallears."

Nobodyspeaksup.EvenRafedrawshismouthintoanunhappy--ifmercifullysilent--line.

"Thenwesplitup,"Ihearmyselfsay.Thewordstearmeapart,butthere'saresonanceinmybondwithEmber.Thisistherightcall.

"Yourvoteisworthnomorethananyoneelse's,"Jianyuintones.

Rafenods,crossinghisarmsandflexinghisbiceps. "Maybeless."

"Guys..."Emberimplores.

"Hedidn'thavetoseeyouwhenwefirstfoundyou,"Jianyuremindsher,andyeah,great,asifIdidn'tfeelguiltyenough. "Youwereshattered."

Ember'ssideofourconnectionrippleswithshameanddoubt.ItrytoshoreherupthebestIcan,butmyownself-loathingthreatenstorearitsuglyhead.

"Stormbrokemyheart,"Embersays,andit'sapunchtothegut.Sherecoversquickly,though,andIforcemyselftocontinuestandingmyground. "Buthe'satoned,overandoveragain."

"I'llkeepatoning--fortherestofourlives."

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