Page 40 of Forever

“Are you okay?” Val rushes in bathroom and the scent of her perfume fills the room making me gag even more.

“Please … Just … Window …”

More than see, I feel her leave. Slowly, my breathing returns to normal and I feel the nausea withdraw.

My hands grip the seat tightly. My whole face and neck are sweaty from the extraction.

Val opens the windows in the main room and I can feel the cool breeze touch my skin.

After the need to throw up my intestines withdraws I get on my shaky legs and walk slowly to the sink. Turning on the cold water, I dampen the towel and squeeze out extra liquid before I press it to my sweaty skin.

Cold towel feels good, so I repeat the process a few times, washing my face, neck, and cleavage.

“Are you okay?”

I turn around and look at the doorway where my best friend lingers.

“Yeah, I just …” The smell of her perfume reaches my nostrils again, but thanks to the open windows it’s not so overpowering as it was before. “What the hell did you put on yourself? A whole box of perfume?”

Val frowns at me. “No, I put a bit on my wrists and neck. It’s the perfume I always use.”

“That is not the perfume you use. They must have changed something.”

She’s been using the same perfume for years. It’s a sweet flowery scent. That shit she put on? Not her scent at all.

I grab my toothbrush and vigorously start brushing my teeth. The stale taste of puke still lingers in my mouth. It’s disgusting, and I’m afraid if I don’t get rid of it soon I’ll throw up all over again.

When I finish I turn back to look at her. I can still feel my stomach roll all over the place, but I don’t think I’ll throw up again.

Is there even something left to throw up?

“You mind if I grab a quick shower? I’m all sticky.”

Val shakes her head. “I’ll pick some clothes for you and leave it here to change.”

*

After my quick shower we rush out of the apartment because the taxi is already waiting for us downstairs.

We were supposed to take the bus, but because of me we’re already running pretty late.

Val wants to stop so I can grab breakfast and coffee, but the mention of food makes my stomach protest. I don’t know what is wrong with me.

Dizziness could be the result of too much work and not enough sleep, but throwing up? I don’t think the sandwich I had for dinner last night was bad. It didn’t taste or smell funny.

Putting my worries at the back of my mind, I concentrate on my friend and her plan for today.

Val organized a meeting with a few wedding salons here in Zadar. There isn’t a lot of them, but I’m sure there will be at least one dress I’ll like. I hope, at least. I’m not in the mood to travel all the way to Zagreb to hunt for the perfect dress.

We spend the next couple of hours in three different, smaller salons. They have nice dresses, but … they aren’t for me.

At the end of those two hours I feel like I’ve seen it all. From traditional pure white dresses to champagne colored. Long sleeves, short sleeves, stripes, no sleeves. Some fall, some are cut in A or extra puffy in the waist. There are princess dresses, the dresses that have mermaid tail … Some are short on the front and long on the back while some have cut on the side. With sparkle and glitter, lace or just simple, clean white.

I could take my pick, but no, none of them work for me.

And I tried. I really did.

Val made me try every dress that I looked for more than five seconds, but in the end, she agreed. They just weren’t me.