Page 135 of Habits

“I think that’s it.”

I start to get up when something in the trash bin underneath the sink catches my attention.

There is a carton, wipes and other garbage, and between it all, a white stick.

Two white sticks.

Mother-fucker.

Andrew

I stay seated in the car for a while after Max runs into the house. He didn’t ask me to come inside, and I don’t think I could take it right now. I haven’t been here a lot, but it still reminds me of her.

The way she gets lost in her music.

The tender expression on her face.

Our bickering.

Those beautiful, shiny gray eyes looking at me.

Her laughter.

It’s all there.

It’s all there, and she’s not.

Not able to sit still for a second longer, I get out of the car. I pace, rubbing my face in frustration.

Why is this happening? Am I cursed or something? People I care about either leave or get hurt. Is this my destiny? To lose all the people I come to care about?

Angry, I kick the tire with my foot.

Over and over again.

Is that it? Is she better off without me? I should probably leave now and not look back. Maybe then she’d have a chance. Maybe then …

“You fucking piece of shit.”

I turn around just in time to see Max storming toward me. He’s a blur until he’s right in front of me, his eyes dark and bloodthirsty. I barely see his hand lift in the air, and then my head snaps back.

A hollow throbbing spreads through my cheek, skin tingling as his fist connects with my face.

“What the …”

I don’t get to finish the question because Max starts punching me again, throwing insults. “You stupid …” Punch to the face. “… fucking …” Another one to my side. “ … son-of-a-bitch.”

His knee lifts, connecting with my gut, making me double over and knocking the air out of my lungs.

I curse, stumbling backward. My hands wrap around my middle, holding on to tender flesh. My stomach hurts like a bitch, and I can already feel a nasty bruise forming on my middle.

“… t-the f-fuck?” I hiss.

Max’s hectic breathing accompanies my shallow, breathless inhales. Every breath hurts, and my lungs burn with the effort.

“This is all your fault!” He throws something at me, and I barely have time to dodge it. “I knew it! I told her you’re not good enough, but did she listen to me? No! Of-fucking-course not. She never listens to anybody.”

“Cra-zy,” I wheeze out.

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