Page 59 of Boards & Betrayal

Tom

Ilaced up my skates after Saint left for the afternoon. He'd been spending less time at the rink now that it was off-season, and I knew his new relationship with Kara had a lot to do with it. I couldn’t blame him.

The ice was freshly zambonied, smooth as glass under the harsh lights of the arena. I stepped onto it, feeling the familiar chill seep through my bones. It was a different kind of cold than what had settled in my chest since Ally walked back into my life.

I pushed off, letting my legs stretch out and fall into rhythm. Skating had always been second nature to me—something that came without thought or effort. But today, each stride felt heavy, like I was dragging a weight behind me.

Ally’s face flashed in my mind—the way her blue eyes darted away when I asked her if something was wrong, how her hands trembled slightly when she stepped out of my office after her little chat with Janet. She was hiding something, and it gnawed at me like a splinter buried too deep to reach.

The rink echoed with the sound of my blades cutting through the ice. The solitude of the arena usually brought me peace, but today it only amplified the questions circling in my head.

Why wouldn’t she just tell me?

I’d been honest with her about everything—about Nick, about Janet, about my own failures and regrets. Yet there was this wall she kept up between us, an invisible barrier that made it impossible for us to move forward.

It wasn’t just frustration; it hurt. The thought that she didn’t trust me enough to open up cut deeper than I wanted to admit. Every time I tried to bridge that gap, she pulled away, leaving me standing on the edge of a chasm that seemed to widen with each passing day.

I increased my pace, trying to outskate the emotions welling up inside me. The ice became a blur beneath my feet as I raced around the rink, but no matter how fast I went, I couldn’t outrun the ache in my chest.

Ally’s secrets were a storm cloud hanging over us, and until she trusted me enough to let me in, that cloud would keep darkening our path forward.

I pushed myself harder, the edges of my skates biting into the ice, propelling me forward. Each stride sent a jolt up my legs, but I welcomed the burn. It was a distraction, a way to drown out the noise in my head. My breath came in short, ragged gasps as I rounded another corner, pushing past the point where I knew I should stop.

Then it hit—sharp and unrelenting. Pain shot through my knee, forcing me to slow down and eventually stop. I coasted to the edge of the rink, leaning heavily on the boards as I caught my breath. The ache in my knee throbbed in time with my heartbeat, a cruel reminder of a past that wouldn’t let me go.

I hated this. Hated being beholden to an injury that refused to heal, even after all these years. It wasn’t just physical; it was like a chain around my neck, dragging me back every time I tried to move forward.

Closing my eyes, I wished for a different life. A life where things had gone right with Nick. Where Janet hadn’t?—

No.The voice in my head was stern.You can’t keep blaming her. You played your part too.

My teeth clenched together, jaw tight with resentment and regret. Admitting that truth felt like swallowing glass, but deep down, I knew it was right. I could have been better. As a partner, as a father—as a man.

I opened my eyes and stared at the empty rink, feeling the fight leave me. It was so much easier to place the blame on others—to make Janet the villain in our story or to see Nick’s anger as unwarranted rebellion.

But at the end of the day, I’d made choices too. Choices that led us here.

The weight of it all settled over me like a heavy blanket—my knee still throbbing, my chest tight with emotions I didn’t want to face. It would have been so easy to skate away from everything if only my body would let me.

Instead, I stood there at the edge of the ice, knowing that skating faster or harder wouldn’t change what was broken inside me or between us.

No amount of speed could outrun that truth.

Stepping off the ice, I winced as the pain in my knee flared up again. I leaned on the boards for a moment, catching my breath and gathering myself before heading to the locker room. The ache in my knee mirrored the gnawing frustration in my chest.

The drive home felt longer than usual. Each mile stretched out, thoughts of Ally swirling in my mind. I wanted to check on her, make sure she was okay after Janet's visit, but I didn't want to push her further away.

Fucking Janet.

Once home, I filled the bathtub with ice and cold water, sinking into it with a groan as the chill seeped into my muscles.The pain dulled slightly, but it did nothing for the turmoil inside me.

I grabbed my phone from the edge of the tub and shot off a text to Janet:

Stay away from Ally.

Her response came almost instantly:

I take it she told you I stopped by? When can I expect my check?

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