Page 51 of Midnight Surrounds Us

“It was me!” Roxi said, bouncing in her armchair with her hand in the air as I sat next to her. “I’m sorry. I just couldn’t hold it in. I’m so proud of you.”

“Jesus.” I breathed slowly, trying to quell my embarrassment.

“Well,” she tried to explain, “sorry, but I just happened to be standin’ next to Abey when you talked to her durin’ your… therailingin question, and you were really loud. And then you didn’t call to tell me about it this mornin’. I had to talk to somebody!”

I scoffed. “The whole town qualifies as ‘somebody’?”

She winced. “Not the whole town. Just book club.”

“She spilled the beans,” Billie drawled. “Get over it and get to the good stuff. Howexactlydid he rail you?”

“What is railing?” Cal asked.

Phil leaned closer to her and whispered, “I’ll explain it at home later.”

“It basically means Aubrey got good and… fucked, for lack of a better word,” Juneau said. “Please,” she whined, “tell ussomething. How do you feel? Was it a positive experience?”

Billie snorted again, and I shot daggers at her eyeballs.

“Yeah. It was… great.”

The word didn’t begin to describe the whirlwind marathon sex fest I’d had with Rye, but I wasn’t ready to share him. The girls now knew he and I were “dating” but that’s all they needed to know.

And I was so not going into how sore my entire body was. I had to be careful not to groan when I sat. I hadn’t checked in my mirror, but I was pretty sure I had bruises in the shape of Rye’s fingerprints all over my hips and ass. The pain was myconstant reminder of the railing I had indeed received, and I never wanted it to go away.

“I’m not goin’ into details, so don’t even ask.”

“He’s so young,” Daisy said. “I can only imagine his stamina! But you girls should’ve seen the way Rye looked at Aubrey. He’s smitten.”

I shook my head. “He is not.”

“He is too,” she argued. “Even José said so.”

Rye had said as much, hadn’t he? That he was falling for me. But when someone on the outside of the situation said it, it felt silly, like some teenage Romeo-and-Juliet farce we were playing in.

I wasn’t someone people adored. Not since the early days with Tommy, and even then, it hadn’t really been me he adored, but the idea of me. The idea of the life and family he’d said he wanted, but then failed to live up to even his own expectations.

As usual, Carly had hearts in her eyes. “Do you like him?” she asked.

“She does,” Roxi practically shouted, but then she turned toward me. “You do like him, right?”

Looking around the room, I knew I couldn’t lie. My friends would see right through me.

“Yes,” I said. “I like him. He’s funny and kind, and he treats me well.”

Abey smiled at me. She knew Rye better than I did, had for years. She’d corroborate his goodness.

“But,” I added, “he’s way too young for me. He lives an hour away, and I have my boys to consider. My business.”

Roxi glared at me and her mouth popped open, probably so she could point out that there wouldn’t be any business had it not been for Rye. She’d promised not to mention to anyone the deal Rye and I had struck, but Roxi was nothing if not passionateabout her friends. Especially me, but before she could blurt it to the entire town, I shut her down with a glare of my own.

“Look, guys, he hasn’t even had kids yet, and you know I can’t be the woman to give those to him.”

He said he didn’t want kids, but that would change. He’d meet some young thing soon, with tight thighs and really perky boobs, and she’d want kids, and Rye would want to give her whatever she wanted. He was that kind of guy.

But why did that image in my head make me sad? He wasn’t mine. He couldn’t be, and I wanted him to be happy, didn’t I?

“Did he say he wants kids?” Aislinn asked. “Maybe he doesn’t. And aren’tyourboys in their twenties? Why do you care what they think? And don’t you think they’d want you to find happiness?”

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