Page 184 of Stalking Ginevra

BENITO

Bringing her here was a mistake.

Even as I lie beneath her on the chaise, having come in my fucking pants, every nerve screams that I’ve fucked up. Ginevra’s breaths are still ragged and uneven from coming all over my face, her hands running slow circles over my chest. I should be relishing this moment, savoring how I made her babble with ecstasy, but all I feel is cold terror.

Fear claws at my insides, working its way to my heart, reminding me of how badly I’ve lost control.

I let her in, let her see that soft kernel of me that should have stayed buried.

Her soft fingers trace my jaw, gentle, comforting, yet all I want to do is rage. Now that I’ve tasted true intimacy, I’d die without it because I’m weak. Weak for Ginevra, weak for her touch, weak for her connection.

She’s seen through the cracks beneath my armor. Seen the hopeless idiot who worships her as the one true goddess, who would do anything to keep her at my side.

And that makes me pathetic.

I close my eyes, trying to steady my breaths, but the panic keeps spiking, refusing to settle. I’ve gone soft. Let her take control, let her see the man she left—that needy, desperate simp who couldn’t breathe without her smile.

Now that she knows my weakness, she’ll take the upper hand.

Ginevra shifts, her lips brushing my cheek in a soft kiss, but all it does is ignite another jolt of fear. Chest tightening, I fight to keep my composure, my teeth grinding together as I struggle not to shove her off.

Because she’s too close, and I’m hanging by a thread.

I can’t let her see what she’s doing. Can’t let her know that every touch, every soft word of love is stripping away my defenses. I don’t want to be the man who loses control, who spills his guts the second she bats her lashes. I’m supposed to be strong. Untouchable. In charge.

But she’s unmasked my façade, and now I’m back to the man I swore I’d never become: desperate, needy, terrified of losing her all over again.

A slow, shuddering breath escapes my lips, and I clench my hands into fists. I brought her here to expose her past and remind her of better times, but all I’ve done is expose my vulnerability. That I’m still the same fool who’d crawl on his knees, desperate for a single smile

And I can feel the shift in Ginevra—the confidence seeping back into her bones. She’s reverting to that vibrant, beautiful creature worthy of worship. It’s everything I’ve wanted for her, but it’s also terrifying. Because what happens when she realizes she no longer needs me?

What happens when she remembers how to live without me?

My throat tightens, and my spine stiffens with a surge of cold panic. I can’t bear to lose the one woman who makes my heartbeat, but I’ve already lost control. I’ve handed her the reins, given her the power to break me, and now I’m at her mercy.

Ginevra’s head shifts on my shoulder, her breath warm and steady against my neck. I dare a glance down to find her flushed with satisfaction. She’s fed on my love, my praise, my devotion. Will that be enough to keep her here?

I love her too much, and that’s my problem. Because love makes a man stupid, makes him weak, makes him blind to the walls around his heart. And now, I’m the one who’s exposed, vulnerable, and I don’t know how to claw my way back.

Ginevra shifts, her hand sliding around my neck. Her eyes flutter open, and she gazes up at me with that soft, contented smile. I should feel like the king of the motherfucking world. But my chest twists with trepidation.

Because that smile won’t last forever.

Nothing good ever endures.

“What’s wrong?” she asks.

I force a smile. “I’m fine.”

Her brow furrows, and I can tell she knows I’m lying, but she doesn’t push. Instead, she rests her head on my chest and sighs. I stiffen. Every heartbeat feels like a countdown to the moment she decides to leave.

Because it’s only a matter of time.

I try to breathe, but every inhale feels like drowning. How could I be so fucking stupid? What made me think it was a good idea to let her know she’s the center of my universe?

Ginevra lifts her head from my shoulder again, and she looks at me with a dazzling smile. My heart skips, and for a second, I forget my panic.

“I still can’t believe how much you’ve changed this place,” she says, her voice breathy with wonder. “It’s perfect.”

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