Page 34 of Ashes to Ashes

Chapter Thirteen

Rae

With my concentrationfocused on the album, I’d been able to forget the real reason why I was holed up in this big house in the woods, but with the arrival of Grace Trombley, reality came crashing backdown.

Originally, this was supposed to have been a satellite interview, but Grace had persuaded Rocky a one-on-one would be more intimate and would better serve everyone’s objectives. Eventually, Ash had agreed to allow the reporter and one cameraman onto the property under strict, direct supervision. The two were currently setting up their camera and sound equipment in the living room while I was upstairs going over the notes Rocky had emailed earlier that morning.

I’d always been good at giving soundbites, but this interview was a whole other beast and I was nervous as hell. Grace had provided a general outline of the questions she would touch on, with the understanding that further questions were likely to crop up as a result of what I might reveal during our conversation. As this would be the one and only time I talked about my marriage, I’d agreed to be as candid as possible, and to share information with Grace no one else had ever had accessto.

While I’d come around to Charlotte’s way of thinking, that didn’t mean I wasn’t worried about the fall out. Ford’s lawyers could slap me with a lawsuit well before the interview even aired, but that wasn’t what had me on tenterhooks. Charlotte and Rocky were right. I could afford the $10 million Ford would sue me for. It was his emotional rebuttal that had my hands shaking now. He’d already proven he had no qualms about lying about me, so I could only imagine what my revelations would dredge up from his twisted and warped imagination.

A light knock at the door pulled me from my contemplation and Ash popped his head in. “They’re ready for you downstairs.”

I took a deep breath and stared at my reflection in the mirror one last time. Objectively speaking, I looked good. Healthy and centered. Despite the terror I’d been put through these last few weeks, I looked like a woman who had a handle on her life, who could sit down and tell the world her story and not crumble under the weight ofit.

“Okay, I’ll be right down,” I said to Ash’s reflection over my shoulder.

Stepping over the threshold and closing the solid wood door behind him, he asked, “Are you sure you want to dothis?”

I swallowed. “I don’t want to do it, but I have to. It’s the only way to set the record straight. We don’t have the first clue why this person is after me, but if it has anything to do with the lies my ex has been spreading about me, this might put an end toit.”

Ash crossed his solid arms over his barrel chest. “Permission to speak freely?”

A rueful smile crossed my face. Once a military man, always a military man, I supposed. “Permission granted, soldier.”

He stepped closer, but didn’t smile back. Dropping his hands on my shoulders and capturing my gaze in the mirror, he squeezed. “I know you like to believe that’s a possibility, and I really wish it was, but it’s my experience—hell, it’s the experience of every damn person at McClintock Security—that these people don’t just go away. Your stalker is already convinced you’re a slut and a whore. Hearing what happened in the wake of the dissolution of your marriage isn’t going to convince them otherwise. My gut tells me it’ll only strengthen their resolve. For whatever reason, they’ve fixated on you, and this interview isn’t going to change theirmind.”

I flinched at his candor but didn’t disagree. “Look,” I said, swiveling to face him. “I know you’re right, okay? The truth is, I didn’t agree to this interview in the hopes of pacifying my stalker. I agreed because I’m tired of that bastard controlling my life, of him being the one telling the world who I am. For years he was the center of my universe, and I let him take the lead in our relationship, let him dictate the terms of our public personas.

“But not anymore,” I continued, slapping my palm to the vanity table. “I’m a grown ass woman with a story of my own; one that is separate from who I am as Crawford Madigan’s ex-wife. Sure, my story isn’t always a great one, but it’s mine, and I’m so fucking tired of hiding it. Tired of not being able to release the music I want to because I’m under a goddamn gag order. My music has suffered. My life had suffered. And I’mdone.

“So no, this interview may not accomplish what Charlotte and Rocky are hoping it will, but it’s the first step in claiming my life back, so I’m going to march down those stairs and deliver a star-worthy performance.” I shot to my feet, determination fueling my resolve.

“Alright then.” Ash’s lips fell into a hard, straight line and his eyes glinted with resolve. “Let’s get you downstairs then and get this over with. I won’t be comfortable until I see their tail lights drivingaway.”

I rubbed his arm as I sailed past. “I can’t imagine what a stress case you’d be if I’d hired you to guard me out in the real world. You’re like a live wire and we’re out here, isolated from everyone, and you are still fit to be tied.” I shook my head and chuckled. “So fucking alpha all thetime.”

Trailing behind, Ash placed his palm on the small of my back and whispered in my ear, “You love that alpha shit and you know it.” He nipped at my ear as I took a step forward, causing me to set my foot down awkwardly. Ash’s arm shot out and clamped around my middle, holding me steady. “Tell me I’m wrong,” he challenged.

“You’re not wrong,” I chirped, stepping out of his hold and skipping down the stairs before he could say—or do—anything else to ruffle my composure.

Even though Ash had brought up some very real concerns, our playful banter while coming down the stairs managed to banish my nerves. He could be intense and brooding, but more and more I was coming to learn he also knew exactly how to lighten the mood and make me laugh.

Approaching Grace with a genuine smile on my face, I stretched my hand out in greeting. “Hello there, good to see you again.”

Returning my smile with warmth, she said, “Hello Rae. Thank you for doing this interview.”

When she turned and gestured toward the overstuffed leather sofa she wanted me to sit in for the duration of our conversation, I noticed the furniture had been rearranged to make the space look more intimate, less masculine. The chairs had been grouped closer together, and soft cashmere and chenille throws and pillows had been added to each seating area, as well as a cut crystal vase full of fresh lavender and rosemary clippings.

Seeing my bemused expression, Grace said, “When I spoke with Mr. Devereaux about the security requirements for our visit, I made sure to ask what the space was like. He tried explaining, but …” She cocked her shoulder and smirked. I knew exactly what she was getting at. “In the end, I had him give me a tour with his phone. It’s a beautiful home, as I’m sure you’ll agree, but it’s verymasculine.”

She looked around the room for a quick second and then her eyes found mine. “I hope you don’t mind me saying so since we’ve only met a few times, but I always think of you as being very feminine, but with a bit of an edge. You give off this vibe that you’re not to be messed with, but you also like the softer, finer things in life. Since this is the first time you’ll be discussing your marriage publicly, I wanted to make you feel as comfortable as possible. I hope I didn’t overstep my bounds.” She pushed her long, straight blond locks behind her ears and then fidgeted nervously with her weddingring.

Interesting. And here I thought I was the only one who’d been nervous about this interview.

“No, of course not.” I reached out and squeezed her hand quickly. “I appreciate your forethought. Those things didn’t even occur to me when I agreed to do the interview.”

Grace laughed good-naturedly. “No, but then again, why would they? Me, on the other hand? This is what I do for a living so I’m always thinking about setting and positioning and lighting and whatnot.” She smiled at me conspiratorially then. “And to be honest, I love getting to play around with new spaces. I know it’s not technically part of my job, but when I was growing up I wanted to decorate houses, so times like these give me an opportunity to flex those muscles a bit so I don’t run away from it all and open up some boutique out in Maine or something.”

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