Page 137 of Unloved

“Why keep trying when it hurts?” I nearly choke on the words, but Bennett only grants me a sad smile, rubbing his mouth a little as he turns down South College.

“Because they’ve been disappointed by too many people,” he says. “And I won’t be one of them.” He pauses and heaves a heavy sigh. “And… she deserves it.”

Matt does, too.

Everyone who has touched Matt Fredderic has only fed that monster in his head, the one that says he isn’t good enough beyond what he can do for them.

I’ll be patient this time, because he’s hurting. Deeply—and he’s been there when I hurt, repeatedly. Matt needs someone who stays, who is willing to prove that he is worth it all. That he deserves good things in his life.

CHAPTER 49Freddy

This is wrong.

I’m eighteen. A freshman, and too hungover to see straight.

My body slams into someone smaller, nearly knocking us both over into the brick outside the corner of the building—is this the one I’m supposed to be in?

“Whoa there,” a voice is saying, helping me lean against the wall. “You don’t look so good. Are you all right?”

Do I look all right?I want to snap, but that only makes the pain in my head worse, so I smile and nod, eyes still closed. “I’m fine. Promise.”

Just keep smiling.Isn’t that what the fish from the Disney movie said?

Either way, I do.

The shower goes cold before I realize how long I’ve been standing in the spray. I shake my head, desperate to clear the demons clinging to me for dear life. But it doesn’t work, not really.

Standing at my dresser for too long, I start to forget what I’m there for.

“What’s your name?” the feminine voice asks. I manage to open my eyes, the haze making everything a little blurry. But I can see her, sleek vibrant red ponytail, concern etched across pale skin. She’s kind of beautiful, in a startling way.

“Freddy,” I say. It wasn’t my name a week ago—but everyone’scalling me that, and hearingMattyout of anyone else’s mouth might send me off the deep end… again.

A loud, banging knock against my door—three in quick succession.

“Freddy?” Bennett’s voice calls. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” I gasp.

When he doesn’t respond right away, I’m worried how much my tone has given away exactly hownotokay I am.

“Okay, Freddy,” she sighs. “I think you’re… sick.” She means drunk, but she’s too polite to say it. “Maybe you should go home.”

I nod, but don’t move, hoping she’ll eventually give up and walk away.

“Let me give you a ride.”

“Practice in fifteen. Be in the car—I’m driving you.”

“I’m good.”

“I can drive myself—”

“You’re not. Are you in the dorms?”

“Yeah, I can walk.” If I can figure out where the dorms are, and possibly whereIam.

“That’s the other side of campus. Let me just drive you—my car’s right behind the building in the lot.”

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