Page 144 of Unloved

The kitchen in Ro and Sadie’s apartment is too empty, in my opinion, but there’s a can of biscuits in the back of the fridge that are easy enough to make and a half-full carton of eggs.

That’s enough—except—

I grab my sweatshirt—giving it a quick sniff test—and Ro’s dorm keys, slipping on my shoes by the door before taking off to the stairs and out into the cold, empty campus.

There’s a coffee shop two buildings over—which is thankfully still open for the break—where I grab an iced dirty chai latte for her and a hot black coffee for me. There’s only one guy working, and he’s slow enough that I’m fidgeting around like a lunatic while waiting for him to finish it, mostly because I forgot my phone and have no idea how long this is taking.

When I get back to Ro’s dorm, she’s awake, looking a little struck at the sight of me.

“You’re here.”

“You’re awake.”

We speak over each other, both laughing as we finish.

“Sorry.” She shakes her head. “I didn’t—is that coffee?”

“Um, no.” I shuffle my feet, regretting it for a moment. “It’s an iced dirty chai. I thought… I can go back and get hot coffee. Or you can have mine.”

She steps forward and grabs the cold drink out of my freezing hand. “It’s my favorite.”

I nod. “I know.”

We both stand quietly, but the silence is too much. I try not to ask her what she’s thinking, trying to give her the space to be vulnerable, until I’m too spinny not to start talking.

“I’m sorry,” I blurt. “I’m sorry about last night and—and I know I shouldn’t… I don’t know if I should even still be here or if you wantme to leave. But before you say anything, I—I promise I didn’t know she was married.”

“Married?” Ro snaps. “What are you talking about?”

“I don’t want you to think I’m a bad person—or, like, more of a bad person than I—”

“Stop,” she barks. “Matt, I…”

She starts, opens and closes her mouth again and again, but can’t get the words out.

“I’m withdrawing from her program,” she blurts, brow furrowed.

It’s not at all what I expected her to say.

“What?”

“Tinley’s program,” she grits out, disgust evident in her tone. “I’m withdrawing from it.”

I’ve never heard that voice from Ro—ever. Never seen the heated, angry look in her eyes, either. She’s hardened and resolute, but barely able to spit out Carmen’s name without a shiver of fury.

“What she did to you? That’s unforgivable, Matt. She took advantage of you, used you, manipulated you—”

“She didn’t pressure me— I was willing. I wanted to—”

“Just because you were willing and wanted to doesn’t mean that she wasn’t in a position of power over you, that she didn’t use it against you—use it to manipulate you. And I know she did it, even without you telling me, because she does it all the time!”

She’s nearly shouting by the end of her tirade, metaphorical steam shooting out of her ears.

She’s… mad. She’s mad at Carmen—not me. She’s mad at Carmenforme.My head spins.

“You don’t want to work with her now?” I swallow against the lump in my throat. “I was… I was worried that you’d be mad at me.”

“Why would I be mad atyou?” She sounds genuinely confused.

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