Page 79 of Not As Advertised

“I know…” I was lying. The guilt of not being enough was eating me alive.

Shaking her head sadly, “No, I don’t think you do, love. But I hope you will. Claire mentioned there was a lovely young woman with you when she last saw you.”

“Abbie. It’s complicated. She works for me. And we’ve been seeing each other. It’s going to be a mess. I’m her direct supervisor. It’s an issue of ethics and professionalism.”

A small smile graced her lips. “But have you felt happy when you’ve been with her?”

“Yes.” I couldn’t deny that I’d been happier than I could ever remember feeling. But even thinking about feeling something other than worry for Rennie right now had me swamped with remorse.

“That sounds like something worth fighting for to me. The best things are, you know. You have us behind you.” She gestured around the waiting room.

“It doesn’t matter right now, Mom. I need to think about Rennie.”

“Whatever you say, love.” Mercifully, she let the subject drop.

I glanced at my watch and saw it was nearly midday. When was the last time any of us had eaten? The need to do something useful overwhelmed me. I could get everyone something to eat, knowing we could use something else to focus on. Evenif hunger was the last thing I was feeling, going through the motions would help my mom and Claire feel a bit better. It was something small in the face of all this powerlessness.

The wait was longer than we’d expected. It wasn’t until after dinner time that we had a full picture of what was going on. We were finally allowed back to see Rennie, after basically clearing out the stuffed animals from the gift shop, of course.

My arms around two different stuffed animals, I followed Mom back to Rennie’s room. When we pulled back the curtain that blocked her bed from the ward hallway, I had to cement my smile in place as my eyes stung.

Poor Rennie was hooked up to an IV and some other monitors. She looked tired but basically alert.

“Grammy! Uncle Aiden! You’re here! Look at my cool bracelet. It has my name on it.”

She held up her wrist, and I felt my heart shred into pieces. Leave it to this amazing little girl to look at the positive of a hospital bracelet. She looked so small in that hospital bed. What could have happened to her if she hadn’t been taken to the hospital in time? Fear weighed heavily on my shoulders.

Walking over to the side of the bed, I set down my contribution to the menagerie of animals next to her. I nodded at Isabel and my mom to go out into the hallway so they could talk.

“I’m sorry, Rennie. I couldn’t get you any new Pokémon this time. There weren’t any in the store here.”

“That’s okay, Uncle Aiden! I can just give them names.” She held up a cat and scrunched up her little nose in concentration. “This can be… Firecat. He’s a fire type. I’ll teach him all he needs to know about being a Pokémon.” She beamed at me.

Despite my exhaustion and frayed nerves, she was just too adorable not to chuckle at her dedication to her obsession.

It reminded me of all the moments at the Anime Expo, where Abbie had enjoyed geeking out over the variousPokémonmerchandise.

Thinking of Abbie made something twist uncomfortably inside me. I couldn’t handle the collision of worry for Rennie and the all-consuming thoughts of Abbie.

“Uncle Aiden, I wish we could go home already.” Rennie sighed, her bottom lip popping out.

Jesus. They should make a warning system that came along with these kids. That was a weapons-grade pout, and it hit me right in the heart.

She pulled the cat into her chest. I saw the IV line and wires around her shifting with her movement. I grabbed my knee under the side of the bed so hard I was sure my fingers were bloodless. My other hand went to her little arm.

I wanted to pick her up and whisk her out of here. I’d do anything she wanted just to wipe that sad look off her face.

“I know, sweetheart. The doctors are going to help, right? We need to give them time to figure everything out.”

“Yep, that’s what they said to Mommy. But Mommy and Daddy seem sad.” God, kids were so perceptive.

Careful not to jostle her IV, I leaned down to kiss her hand princess-style to make her smile.

“Grown-ups worry sometimes. It’s kind of our job. But that doesn’t mean that they aren’t okay. We’re all so happy we can be here to visit with you. Let’s do something while we wait for Grammy to finish talking to Mommy, okay?”

We agreed to watch a couple of episodes ofPokémonon her tablet. Abbie snuck into my thoughts again. I remembered how detailed thePokémonuniverse was when Abbie had tried to make sense of it for me and how much she enjoyed it. ThinkingRennie might feel the same, I asked lots of questions that Rennie was happy to answer. It turned out she loved sharing herPokémonknowledge.

After the second episode finished, I reached for my phone and opened my photos.

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