Page 151 of Skate the Line

I just don’t want to.

Me: About?

I know very well what this is about.

Sunny: Ellie.

Oh?

Me: Is everything okay?

Again, there she goes. Surprising me.

She types for a while. The text bubbles pop up, disappear, and then pop up again. This happens for so long that Emory shuts his phone off and rolls over to sleep.

My heart rate spikes when her text finally comes through.

Sunny: She asked me if I had a mom, and I explained to her that my mom died when I was a baby and that my grandparents were the ones who raised me. I told her that I considered my nana to be my mom.

I remember eavesdropping—I mean,overhearing—a phone conversation between her and her nana. Sunny’s mother died shortly after her birth, just like Gia.

Ellie doesn’t open up to just anyone, so the fact that she’s openly asking Sunny these questions means that I’m not the only one who is beginning to trust her.

Sunny: But then she said something that I’m afraid she’ll repeat to you and get twisted.

Well, this is getting interesting.

Me: Like?

Sunny: She compared my grandparents…to us.

Us.Us.

Why did my pulse pick up its pace at the thought of there being an us?

Sunny: Then she kind of got sad because she saw the shock on my face. She thought I didn’t want to be her mom, and I panicked because she looked so hurt. I told her that the mom role is a very hard spot to fill but that I’d be whatever she wanted me to be.

I reread her text so many times the words blur.

Guilt crashes around me, which is unfair because I’m not to blame for this single parenting gig I’ve found myself in. However, I could also put insomeeffort to find a wife or a motherly figure for Ellie that isn’t my hot, too-young nanny who has an entire life ahead of her.

Sunny: After a few minutes, all she said was the word “here”.

What?

Me: Here?

Sunny: She said that she just wanted me to be here…with her.

Shit.

That hits hard.

I can’t fuck things up with Sunny. If I do something that scares her off, she’ll run, and Ellie will be devastated.

Me: That’s good. She obviously has a connection with you.

So do I.