Page 262 of Chaos Kills

And how one of his brothers hates me like that’s not gonna be a problem.

A strangled laugh penetrates my ears as Reeve presses one more long and lingering kiss to my cheek before straightening his spine and aligning those beautiful hazel eyes down at me.

“You don’t know when to leave well enough alone, do you, McQueen? How to accept defeat or the fucking fact that I don’t want to start over with you. You have Cairo protecting you, Ozzy doing the same, so what the fuck do you need me for?”

“Because I lo—” His abrupt semi-glower cuts me off.

He doesn’t want to hear it.

He doesn’t wish to accept or give a shit about it.

“Your best bet is to stop.”

My heart plummets into a deep and dark part of my gut as Reeve continues to stare at me with zero emotion. A strand of sandy blonde hair grabs my attention, taunting me to push it aside and past his eyes.

For once, I don’t.

For once, I heed what he’s saying and demand my fucking heart just pay attention.

“What will it take?” I ask wholeheartedly. “For you to be well again?”

“Nothing,” he immediately replies, his hazel eyes blank. “There’s nothing you can do.”

A lump forms in my throat as guilt—thick and acidic—runs across my tongue. “I want you.”

“I’m right here.” He leans forward, his lips only a breath away from sending me to oblivion where I can forget for a few minutes. Where we can just be, somewhat, what we used to be. “Tell me how hard or soft you want me to fuck you, McQueen. You tell me everything you want, and I’ll give it to you, baby.”

I force myself not to chase his mouth. To silence us both from taking one side or the other.

Mine being that I need him to be himself again.

And his to use sex as a tonic for erasing his memories.

Memories of us.

The ones he mentioned of what we could be and what I’m still tightly clutching onto for dear life.

“I want you to be better,” I mutter. “I want you to come back home.”

“I am home.”

I rock my head back and forth because his mother’s house is not his home. “You need to stop this before you overdose and get yourself killed. I can’t deal with that. I cannot handle the thought of you not being here, walking this Earth with me.’

“You’ll be fine.”

“No, I won’t.”

“Shut up, McQueen.”

“Please, Reeve.” I grip onto the front of his shirt. “Don’t do this for me. Do it for Cairo and Ozzy and fuckin’ Torin?—”

“I said shutup.”

“You have to get—” He rips himself from my hold and glowers at me as though he can’t stand being next to me for another second.

“Since you can’t just shut up the fuck up and allow me some tranquility with you, I know a blonde who will just take my cock and not want to talk about the past or any feelings she may be experiencing right now.” Reeve puts some distance between us and gives me a shitty little smirk. “Enjoy my mother’s party, McQueen. She’s a shark, so watch out.”

I watch him leave the drawing room, the only thing keeping me company here is a large wooden desk that appears like it hasn’t been used in a long time, but the room is still filled with fresh flowers and smells floral.