Page 66 of Chaos Kills

“You thought you were going to up and leave me, Wildfire.” His thumb runs over the fullness of my bottom lip, dragging it down before I feel him lean forward. “Did you do everything you were supposed to do? To wreck me?”

“I’m tired of talking to you about this,” I mutter, smelling the oaky hints of caramel from the bourbon he’s been drinking. “Get away from me.”

He tilts my head up and leans farther in, catching my next inhale as he locks those amber eyes with mine. “Then give me something worth experiencing the pain over.”

Torin is quick to act, his mouth falling to mine in a brutal kiss that demands satisfaction. He captures my bottom lip like he did the vital organ that’s currently sprinting in my chest. His sharp teeth graze down the soft flesh there before coming back to soothe it away.

My hand shoots up to his chest but does nothing.

Not when Torin’s tongue slides easily between my lips, mangling with mine before a deep, feral growl leaves his chest.His firm body pushes me harder into the metal behind me, taxing my patience and need for self-awareness. I can taste the strong and rich aftermath of alcohol off his tongue.

He’s been drinking—a lot. It’s strong and as though I’m taking a sip right now.

He’s in his feelings and sought me out. I’m also highly aware he can’t keep yanking me back into him for his own mental health. That once was enough and all our heads can fucking take.

But he’s like a damn drug. He feels so good, the way he mollifies my body and ramps it up at the same time. The dependency of how he makes me feel alive, fucking needed, and desired.

Lies.

They are all lies.

My head catches up with my body, pushing him back, holding my palm on the hard planes of his chest to keep him from getting any closer to me again.

“Don’t touch me,” I breathe out with zero strength behind it. “I don’t want you.”

I feel the heavy intakes of oxygen sinking in and out of Torin’s chest, affected in the same way I am. The push and pull that titters back and forth between us.

And someone needs to put a stop to it.

“Your body says different,” he rebuffs, circling his fingers around my wrist and towing my arm to wrap around his neck. He steps forward then, taking back his place against me to close the distance between our lips again. “And so does mine.”

I shake my head, just for his hand to envelop my jaw tighter to keep me still.

He wants to control me.

The situation.

Us.

He may not be able to stay away for too long, but we’re not going to fall back into this easily again. Because last time, it was too fucking easy. That’s why we’re standing here.

And because I stabbed his brother.

“Torin,” I utter, trying to pull more strength from somewhere inside me to sound more adamant. “Leave?—”

“Kiss me back,” he snarls, licking at my lips and demanding I follow his lead. “Show me that you missed me, too.”

I don’t.

I so fucking do.

Love is for the fucking stupid. I can only imagine how much more this would hurt if I was full-blown, head over heels in love with him. I have very deep-seated feelings for him, and I hate myself for even that. For doing this to my family because I couldn’t keep my damn legs shut.

He’s a damn pandemic to my existence and everyone in it. He will kill or maim us all. He will tear me into tiny pieces that will blow into the ocean and never be found again.

The base of his hand slides up my face, holding the side of it as he kisses me with fervor, a need that demands to be sated and confirmed. I follow him, though, like a damn sheep.

I know I shouldn’t, that’s the thing.

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