Page 95 of Chaos Kills

It doesn’t matter that I’m butted up in the corner and away from patrons enjoying their drinks and working on their laptops. Nessa is never going to buy that she can go with us after we get settled in. Her abandonment issues run deep. She already believes it’s exactly what Levi and I are doing, but she doesn’t quite understand the shit we’re in.

The shitI’min.

Yes, she knows I’ve fucked Torin seven different ways to Sunday. That I also fell for Reeve and permitted him to fuck me without wrapping up, but she’s never going to fully grasp the shit or the way these boys hate me. She doesn’t have a full scope of what’s at stake and how more shit could rearrange our lives.

Things we can’t bring back.

The bells at the front door of the coffee shop chime in welcome, and Nessa waltzes in, immediately scanning the place for me.

She has a black beanie on top of her long blonde hair. Gold hoop earrings drape from underneath it as her eyes find me, and I give her a small, pathetic wave.

This shit isn’t going to go well, Astor.

The bitch is gonna flip this table on you.

My stomach aches as she strides closer. A look of pure irritation illuminating her face,even over her pristine makeup.

She’s in a baggy white sweatshirt that teases her waistline and black leggings that hug her curves. Her body gracelessly drops into the bench seat across from me, huffing once as a reminder that I begged her to come here and to make it quick.

“You still like mochas, Nes?—”

“Say what you gotta say,” she clips out their knitted brows. “And let’s be done with this.”

Fuck me. This is gonna be impossible.

“This isn’t forever, dude,” I disclose evenly, picking at the napkin underneath my coffee. “I need you to understand that.”

“Seems like long enough to me.”

I shake my head and lean back against the plush padding. “It’s not like that. I need to get Ellie and Mae in a safe spot.”

“Isn’t that what The Nameless is for?”

I give her an unimpressed scowl at her suggestion. “You want me to hang out in the middle of a war with my sisters and pray for the best? I just lost Dad, Nessa. I’m not losing them, too.”

“You’re over-exaggerating,” she rebuffs, crossing her arms along her chest. “Those boys aren’t gonna do shit to you unless you didn’t use your pussy right.”

This bitch.

I understand why I did this.

That I didn’t want to leave South Shore on bad terms, but this is like asking Torin to forget about Judah.

It’s not gonna happen.

“This isn’t a game,” I reply cautiously, choosing careful words so I don’t tip her more over the edge. “I’m not just dealing with horny fuckboys. There are Titan seats in the mix, and I’m being accused of murdering Torin’s brother.”

“You didn’t.”

“And you think he believes that? Matteo has him all twisted up in the head with that video, and he’s not thinkin’ right. I’m not sitting back and waiting for him to come up with another plan that might get me killed this time.”

“What do you meanthistime?” she hedges with narrowed eyes. “He hasn’t lifted a finger against you yet.”

I will possibly die on the hill of never ratting Torin Wildes out.

And I’m not about to tell my best friend with the hope she’ll never expose my secret to Levi because she will.

She will because I know I would do the same thing.

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