Page 56 of Crow

“Why not?” I run my finger down his spine, holding my breath until my lungs feel bruised.

“Because you don’t know what you’re getting into. You truly, truly don’t.”

“You’re right. But that doesn’t change my mind. I want you. I want you exactly as you are. All the things you’ve done and not done. Said and not said.” I bite down on the meaty part of his shoulder. He hisses. “Please.”

He twists faster than I can imagine, hauling me up by my arms. “There’s nothing in here to wash with. Come into the shower.” He edges me across the bathroom, to the glass enclosure. He steps in, cranks the spray, and thrusts me under it.

He stands just far enough apart that I can tell he still thinks there should be distance between us. Still thinks that he broke whatever good thing we’d shockingly woven together, that forever and always, he’s going to have to remain on the outside.

I’m having none of it.

My hand closes around his forearm, swinging myself around and swiveling him under the warm water. There are small containers on the wall with a pump. Shampoo, conditioner, soap. I load up with a huge glob of shampoo that smells like herbs. Rosemary or mint, then lather my hands together.

Before I can reach his hair, Crow’s hand snakes around my waist. His fingers bite into my hip as he tugs me into him. Our bodies slam together and then his mouth is on mine. It’s not a war, but the way he kisses is deeply passionate. Every long, deep draw of his mouth on mine echoes between my legs.

I get my hands on his hair and lather up the thick, luxurious, black strands.

His cock twitches in his boxers, throbbing against my belly.

I want to take him out. I want him in my mouth again. I want to know what it’s like to finally take him inside of me. It crashes into me that it wasn’t him who did this with me. I can understand how he’d feel betrayed by that. Not by me, but by Raven. I don’t know how I can help them. Either of them. I’m afraid that I’ll become another reason for a schism between them, a constant source of contention and fight, but then I remember what he said.

That I’m the one thing they’ve ever agreed on.

Crow kisses differently than Raven. Raven didn’t hurry, but he was borderline desperate. Far more bodice-ripper than sensual. I thought it was sheer need, but now I know that he knew his time might be brief. He’s the kind of person who lives hard, knowing every minute might be their last. Crow takes his time. He savors me like I’m a fine, expensive wine. I would almost call him shy or reserved, but that’s not right. Crow’s like an iceberg. He’s such an incredibly deep person that it would take a lifetime to know him even just a little. I bet he’s read more books already than I could hope to do in all the years I have left on this planet.

His hands rove over my body, almost hesitant, exploring, waiting for my permission. He doesn’t want to scare me. He doesn’t want to be too much. He’s searching for me, but maybe he’s also searching for himself inside of me.

I don’t know where that thought comes from. I don’t even know how that could be possible.

He drops his head, kissing away water droplets from my neck, running his tongue over my shoulder and collarbones. He slides my bra strap down my arm and kisses the tiny mark it left behind. I know he’ll be a gentle, tender, thorough lover, with artist’s hands that make me come alive, but I don’t need him to think that I’m fragile or reluctant.

Before him, want was nebulous. It didn’t have a face or a name. Now, I can’t imagine wanting anyone else.

His eyes fly up to mine, gripping my midsection like a tight squeeze. They were hollowed out with worry at the vet clinic, and the ice hasn’t completely left.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Hurt me? Why would you ever do that?”

“I…” His eyes are deep wells of pain. “I want to make sure that Raven didn’t.”

“Oh.”Oh.“No! I…” I cup his face as his hand curls around my hip, brushing the drops of water away as his finger smooths a small circle along my pale skin. “I feel like it’s not something you really want to hear, what we did together. Kissing and telling is kind of gross, but I certainly wasn’t hurt.” I drop my hand and catch his, flattening it against my belly and then directing it down, down, between my legs. “Fuckkkk.” My head falls back, the water soaking the front of me, sluicing along my breasts and traveling down, like a riverbed guiding the current straight to my hot, aching center. “You might not remember, but I think your body will.”

He tries to respond. His lips work, but the only sound that comes out is a groan. His hand splays over me, his finger slowly caressing down my slick seam. I whimper, arching into his hand, so needy and desperate that I’m half ready to spear myself on his fingers all on my own.

His free hand shoots out, collaring me lightly. He doesn’t press against my neck. His eyes darken, feral with hunger.

I tilt my face up in silent supplication and part my lips.

He leans in until our faces are only inches apart, our breath mingling together. He searches my face, eyes darker yet, almost black, soft and hard mingled like a tightly braided rope. It’s so intimate that it steals my breath.

His mouth drops to mine, his lips parting. Like everything he’s done so far, it’s a question.

I wrap my arms around his neck, digging my nails into his shoulder, dragging him into me. I want his fingers buried inside of me. I want his tongue in my mouth. I want him to pin me to the shower wall with his massive body and split me in half with his thick cock.

I kiss him like a wild animal, thrashing against his fingers, moving my hips to guide him to my entrance or my clit. Either. Both. I just need him. I need his sweet mouth, the rich taste of him, smoke and leather, salty metal when I score my teeth over his bottom lip harder than I mean to.

He growls, his tongue stroking mine feverishly, but his fingers don’t impale me. They play in my wetness, stroking me softly, parting me to explore the shape of me, dancing sweetly over my clit and away, stroking the burn into something nebulous and maddening that crowds the edge of my mind like a punishing cloud.