Page 74 of Paper Roses

I open my mouth to ask what guest room but realise just in time that he’s talking about my bedroom. “What about it?” I say warily.

“Well, Tyler misread Eric’s instructions.”

“Where is Eric?” I say, looking around. “Has he emigrated to the Arctic where he can fuck up building work for the polar bears?”

“He’s at the dentist, but he left strict instructions for what Tyler was to do.”

“That man’s naïvety never ceases to astound me.”

“Maybe it would be better if we showed you,” Artie says decisively. “Come along, Tyler.”

Tyler follows him like a puppy, shooting nervous looks back at me. I follow them up the stairs.

Everywhere there are signs of change. A plush carpet runs up the stairs and the walls are papered in a light turquoise patterned paper that Artie happily told me was inspired by the Royal Pavilion.

Artie stops at the door to my bedroom. Not that I need it at the moment. All my nights have been spent in Artie’s bed. I have no desire to move into this room. “You probably need to prepare yourself.”

“Oh god." He smiles and I look over at the apprentice who’s doing his best to appear invisible. “I insist Tyler must go first,” I say silkily.

Tyler’s aggrieved sigh makes my mouth twitch, and he shuffles into the bedroom. It’s a big room with a view over the street, but I prefer the one I share with Artie. I look around. “So, what’s the problem?” I ask.

Artie steps next to me. “Why don’t you open the door to the en suite?”

I move forward and then blink, running my hand over the solid wall. “Where’s the door?”

He nods. “Yes, thatisrather the root of the problem.” Artie taps the wall. “It’s actually supposed to be here.”

“Tyler,” I say grimly.

Tyler examines the wall as though the door might mysteriously appear. “Yes, Mr Walker. I’m afraid I read Eric’s instructions wrong. He asked me to block up the old door in the dressing room and get the wall ready for plastering.”

“And?”

He spreads his hands in an aggrieved fashion. “Well, I got the wall wrong, didn’t I? You get dressed in a bathroom too. It was an easy mistake.”

“It’s a good job you didn’t work in a medieval nunnery,” I observe. He blinks in confusion, but Artie chuckles. The sound fills me with warmth, and I smile at him. I make sure it drops when I turn to Tyler. “So where is the bathroom door? Is there one, or should our guests just abseil down from the roof whenever they need a shower?”

“Ah, there is a new door,” he says, brightening. He points at a door that has appeared on the other side of the room. “Ididdo that.”

“Where does that lead to?”

He sighs. “Into the third bedroom.”

“Well, I’m sure it’ll be super good fun to find dynamite to blow a hole in the wall just to have a bath. How lovely that you’re reconfiguring my house,” I say.

I shift a glance at Artie. He might be irked that I’m claiming ownership of his home. But his expression is unadvisedly thrilled. I certainly shouldn’t be grinning at him like an idiot either.

I begin composing a speech to tell off Tyler, but then I just sigh and wave my hand. “You might as well go home early, Tyler.”

He brightens. “Really?”

“Yes. I think we can wait for you to open a cupboard door and bring the whole house down around our ears.”

He smiles because he’s become very adept at ignoring my sarcasm. Then his face clouds. “What about Eric?”

“I’ll tell him,” I say resignedly.

“Thanks, Jed. Bye, Artie.” He’s gone quicker than a cartoon cat chasing after a mouse.

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