Page 58 of The Monster at the End of This Courtship

"Of course they can." I kissed his cheek. "Once they have their first molts, they can move to their own beds."

That would be in less than a week, according to Punky's text when Tuft asked.

"Is that enough time?" I asked.

Tuft nodded. "They grow up so fast. I never wanted to have human children, but damn, they're already walking on their own?—"

A loud crash interrupted him. Windsor had made it to the top of my bookshelf and shoved a plastic cup full of colored pencils onto the floor.

"How did he even know it was there?" Tuft asked.

We watched in awe as our firstborn picked up a colored pencil, arranged it in his hand, and aimed it at the floor. With a quick magic spell, I shimmied a piece of Tuft's craft paper beneath him and the scattered pencils, and the other two took interest. Soon, all three were doodling geometric shapes on the paper-covered floor.

"I've seen this," Tuft whispered. He brought out the box of shells and showed me the insides, also covered with geometric shapes.

"I think we need the priestess." I only hoped we didn't need an exorcism, if that was even an Ignitas ritual.

Priestess Alma arrived within the hour.

"Your babies are a delight," she said after watching them cover the poster-sized sheet of paper with diamonds and stars. "This is unusual behavior, but … " she looked embarrassed as her eyes darted around the room to all the childproof locks I'd put up as soon as Tuft laid our eggs. What can I say? I didn't want to be surprised with babies the way we had been gobsmacked by early eggs.

"Who am I kidding?" she muttered. "We don't know the usual behavior for eggs laid in the sun. We're generations from the first kobold/human hybrids. We spent almost a hundred years below ground. Our children have surpassed what I remember from before the dragon attacks. I admit, I was young, but I was already in training to become a priestess. I saw my share of eggs and hatchlings." Priestess Alma shrugged. "I think we can all agree, you are blessed to have such happy, healthy children."

We were, but I could see the gears turning in Tuft's head.

Windsor's jaw cracked with a yawn. I picked him up and moved him to our bed, now with clean sheets. The best part would be sleeping without the rustle of the tarp, but I'd kept it on the bed for now, in case we had middle-of-the-night accidents before we moved the children to their own beds.

"Are you sure they're all right?" Tuft asked as he placed Balthus and Kelvin beside Windsor. They snuggled together in a pile in the middle of our bed.

"Better than all right," the priestess said, patting his shoulder. "I already know the alpha and omega mates for Balthus and Windsor. And with their drawing skills and attention to design, you could have your own construction crew, Axel and sons."

I laughed at the thought of working with my children one day. I would have gotten on my adoptive father's last nerve. "I won't hold them to that. They can be whatever they want when they grow up."

She smiled and nodded. "Thank you for reminding me. Sometimes I forget there are other, more human uses for their skills. Art is its own calling, on Earth?"

"It is." Tuft slipped his arm around me and directed the priestess to follow us back to the living room. "When will you expect them in school?"

"Not until their second molt. That will give them time to learn about family and routine."

Routine. Tuft glanced up at me, and I resisted the urge to laugh at his terror.

"I'm sure we'll have this place running like clockwork by then," I promised.

Tuft rounded on me after we'd said goodbye to the priestess and had the house to ourselves once more. "Clockwork? I haven't woken before noon since?—"

"We should wake the children and take them outside until sundown." That would set the expectation that they could play in the evenings. "Then, we'll get them ready for bed." I also hoped the evening exercise would prevent any nighttime accidents. "We'll sleep when they sleep and see how long it lasts."

"How did fate decide I should end up with someone so smart?" Tuft stared at me in wonder, and I couldn't help it. I leaned in and kissed him until I was dizzy with love.

"We're both pretty amazing, sugar," I told him. "We're going to be the best parents our little kobolds could want."

Epilogue

Tuft

Aweek after our babies hatched, Weld knocked on our door with a handful of coloring books. Before opening the door, I glanced down at my dirty white t-shirt and worn khaki shorts. That wouldn't do. I magicked a crisp white dress shirt and khaki pants from my drawer, and then added my rainbow suspenders and bow tie.

I opened the door with a flourish. "Weld!"

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