Page 58 of A Raven Reborn

“I’ll do my best,” she said with a shrug. “My initial response was that I was sorry that I had been caught. I felt it wasn’t fair.” She turned over her next card. “Then, I was sorry that Ash and the others had been out in the rain looking for me. I was sorry for being an inconvenience. But eventually, I became sorry that I had been so caught up in my own wants and desires that I hadn’t thought about how my actions would impact anyone else.”

Patrick nodded, but he didn’t interrupt her. Somehow her words were beginning to make sense, and they seemed to call to something inside him, as well.

“I have to confess something. I didn’t actually believe Ash would punish me.” She looked down and pushed the two cards toward him. He hadn’t noticed he’d won the round. “Sure, I thought he might scold me, but I was shocked when he handed down an actual punishment.”

Patrick nodded. “To be honest, so was I.”

“Well,” she continued. “At first, I thought I must have seen myself as entitled, or believed that I was above the rules.” She drew her lips in thoughtfully. “I hadn’t actually felt that way, though. Then today, I finally figured out the truth. I felt like I wasn’t one of you, like I didn’t belong. I felt as if I was just an interloper in your world… in this world,”—she spread her arms out wide—“and you had all just taken pity on me.” Rosie paused and flicked the corner of two cards together, probably gathering strength for whatever she was going to say next. “I didn’t think he’d punish me, because I believed that in his eyes, I wasn’t worth punishing.”

Patrick’s heart ached. “Oh, Rosie.”

“Wait.” She held up her hand to stop him from continuing. “It gets better. I promise.”

“I hope so,” he said with a smile, despite the sadness he felt. He reached across the table and took hold of her hand, trying to pour some of his own strength into her.

“What I finally realized was that I had been wrong. Ash wasn’t kind to me because he felt sorry for me, nor was he punishing me because he was angry. Daisy didn’t put salve on my hands every single day because she took pity on me. They did those things because they care. They care about me.”

“Of course they do!” Patrick got up and came around the table, taking her hands in his. “You are a kind, caring, smart, funny, beautiful, wonderful woman. How could they not care about you?”

She shook off all of his complimentary words, but he could see the pink infusing her cheeks. “But it made me finally understand something else.” She looked down at their locked hands. “Perhaps, the reason you wanted to send me away, was not because you didn’t want me. Not because you were just trying to protect me, or because you were taking pity on me.” She looked up into his eyes once more. “Perhaps, it was because you care about me.”

Patrick dropped to his knees in front of her. “I’ve been the world’s biggest fool.” He pressed his lips to her knuckles. “I don’t just care about you, Rosie. I love you.” He kissed her knuckles again. “I love everything about you, and I think I have from the first moment you burst into my office in your night clothes, defending Finch with all your might.”

Rosie somehow began to laugh and cry simultaneously. “That’s good,” she said, as she sniffed and wiped tears from her face. “Because I think I have loved you from the moment you wrapped your arms around me inside that hansom cab as we rode away from Maison Rouge.”

“Truly?” He could hardly believe what he was hearing. If it was true, he was the luckiest man alive. She nodded, tears still streaming down her face. It turned out it wasn’t hard at all to tell her how he felt. And now, what he was about to do, which he’d spent a lifetime swearing he’d never do, felt like the most natural thing in the world.

“Rosie… I’m sorry, even in this moment, I can’t bring myself to call you Rosalyn. To me, you’ll always be Rosie.”

“I’ll always beyourRosie,” she said, softly kissing his forehead.

“Well then, my Rosie.” He cleared his throat. “My sweet, wonderful Rosie, will you do me the great honor of becoming my wife?”

“Only if you promise to never send me away.” Her eyes shimmered with fresh tears.

“I promise I’ll never send you away. I intend to spend every day of the rest of my life proving just how much I love you.”

“Yes, Patrick. Of course I will marry you.”

He pulled her to her feet and wrapped his arms around her, claiming her mouth with a searing kiss. His Rosie. She squeaked as he spun her around. That’s when he noticed Daisy standing in the doorway.

“It’s about time,” she said, as she came into the room.

Rosie rushed over to Daisy and threw her arms around her. When they parted, Daisy placed her arms on Rosie’s shoulders. “Maybe he was worth it after all.”

ChapterTwenty

Patrick understood that visiting both of their families was necessary before they actually married, but he wasn’t looking forward to it. Ash had insisted that Daisy join the two of them on their journey north to see Patrick’s brother. He’d thought it seemed ridiculous at first, seeing as how they’d already shared a bed more than once. But perhaps it was for the best. Patrick didn’t want the next time he made love to Rosie to be rushed, and he certainly didn’t want it to be in a carriage. Without a chaperone, who knew if he’d have been able to stop himself from trying. There was no doubt in Patrick’s mind that Rosie wanted sex, she’d just only experienced it under terrible circumstances. That would never happen again. He would show her the pleasures it could bring and teach her to embrace it.

As they approached his brother’s estate, Rosie’s eyes grew wide as she stared out the window. Patrick tried to imagine what it must be like through her eyes. Rolling lawns and perfectly tended gardens surrounded a massive, sprawling, stone monstrosity. Now that he’d been away for a few years, it seemed absurd that such homes even existed, while so many in the world lived in abject poverty. The whole system sometimes made him uncomfortable in his own skin. They crossed a bridge and started up the main drive to the house.

Rosie’s hands trembled as he took them in his. “You’re going to be fine. I promise.” Patrick could tell she’d been terrified from the moment they’d gotten off the train and she’d seen the gleaming carriage, emblazoned with the Epworth crest. It didn’t help that the servants that had accompanied the carriage kept bowing and my lording him. Daisy was either completely exhausted by the train ride, or just unimpressed. She’d climbed into the carriage and promptly fallen asleep.

Patrick wrapped an arm around Rosie’s shoulders and pressed a gentle kiss to her temple. “If you’d rather, we can still stop this carriage right now and elope to Gretna Green, to hell with the lot of them.” She smiled, then, and giggled softly.

“What if they hate me?’ she asked, her eyes wide with worry. “Or what if your brother refuses to allow it and sends me away?”

“Whoa, whoa. None of that will happen.” He scooted away from her so that he could face her. “My brother is a pompous arse who doesn’t like anyone. You can simply disregard anything he says.” He squeezed her hands. “However, his wife, Ariana, is sweet and kind, and she will adore you.” Rosie did not look convinced. “What I can promise you,”—he hooked a finger under her chin and encouraged her to look up and meet his gaze—“is that no matter what happens, we will be wed. I love you. I want you to be my wife more than anything. Nothing on this earth will change that. And have I mentioned that my brother is a boor, and I don’t give a tinker’s damn what he says or thinks?”

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