Page 12 of A Raven Returns

“Gwen, you haven’t done anything wrong. You were scared and hurt and not at all in your right mind last night. You certainly don’t need to feel guilty about anything you’ve done. You are a sweet, wonderful, caring woman who was taken advantage of by a terrible man. I wish I could take that away and make it so it never happened.”

That wasn’t exactly an answer to what she’d asked, but he was right about her state of mind. She simply nodded. “Thank you, Ash, for always being so kind.”

Before she could ask more questions, they arrived in the village. She’d never been so spoiled in all her life. By the time they finished, she had several gowns, a new coat, undergarments, shoes, stockings, reticule, night clothes, and multiple pieces of expensive jewelry. She could only imagine how much it had cost him.

“Perhaps not as good as what Ella would have made for you in London,” he said, once they were settled into the carriage, once more, “but it will do for the time being. It also allowed me to give some patronage to my own village for once.”

“Ash, how am I ever going to pay you back for all of this?”

He waved a hand dismissively. “I told you, it’s part of the ruse. You needed appropriate attire.”

She shook her head. There was no use arguing with him. “Well then, thank you, my lord.”

“You’re quite welcome, Mrs. Lawrence.”

She giggled. “Where did that name come from anyway?”

He shrugged. “I hadn’t thought it through and it was the first thing that popped into my head.”

Gwen loved his smile. Especially the mischievous one that made his dark eyes sparkle. She could lose herself in those eyes forever.

“I hope you won’t mind.” His voice startled her from her dreamy thoughts. “There is another stop I need to make before we return… home.” The pause hadn’t been lost on her. She knew he didn’t think of this place as home and had struggled to say it.

“Of course. Whatever you need.”

* * *

A wave of nervousness washed over Ash as the carriage came to a halt before a small, but well-kept cottage. He asked Gwen to wait and climbed down from the carriage. It was such a complicated mix of emotions that filled him as he approached the front door. He wasn’t afraid of the man, even though he had administered countless beatings on his father’s orders. Ash hadn’t understood at the time, of course, but he could remember the look on Benson’s face. The man had done it in order to spare him from worse.

His hand trembled slightly as he raised it to knock. The door opened, and when Benson’s eyes came to rest on Ash’s face, his bright smile instantly vanished, replaced by a look of shock, or perhaps even horror. Ash didn’t say anything for a moment, allowing him time to simply absorb who it was standing before him.

“My lord!” he finally said, dropping into a deep bow. Confusion and fear had both crossed the man’s face, but he didn’t meet Ash’s gaze again. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Well, it would seem I’m temporarily in need of a valet,” Ash said simply.

Benson did look up then, his eyes searching Ash’s face. “I don’t understand, my lord. Why me?”

Ash shrugged. “Because I believe I can trust you.”

Benson scoffed, but then stopped himself. “Apologies, my lord.”

“You may speak freely with me, Benson.” Ash spoke softly and tried to be as unintimidating as possible.

The older man looked into Ash’s eyes, his own beginning to shimmer with unshed tears. “After all I did to you? All the pain I inflicted upon your young body? How could you ever begin to trust me?”

Ash breathed in deeply before responding. “Because I’m not that boy anymore, and I understand now that what you did was, in fact, a kindness. You spared me from the worst of my father’s wrath. My father was the brutal tyrant, Benson. Not you.”

“But then I abandoned you.” Tears spilled over the man’s cheeks and his chin trembled.

“Of course you didn’t.” Ash tried his best to reassure the man. His heart broke for him. He’d had no idea he harbored so much guilt. “After my brother… well, after he was gone, things became volatile. My father’s grip on reality was fragile at best, and his rages became indomitable. You couldn’t have tempered him, even if you’d stayed.”

Benson sniffed. “I would be honored to serve you, my lord.” He bent into another deep bow.

Ash placed a hand on his shoulder and urged him upright. “I’ll not have you kissing my ring, Benson. I’m not my father.”

Benson looked into his eyes, the corners of his mouth tipping up ever so slightly. “Of course you’re not, master Adrian.”

Joy warmed Ash’s heart, healing a small part of it that had broken a lifetime ago. He patted Benson on the shoulder. “Good man. I should warn you, though. You may see me behaving a bit like my father. I’d appreciate it if you would play along. There are things afoot at Woodburn that I’m trying to get to the bottom of. Which is also why I need you to start today. I’ll see to anything you might need to make that happen.”

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