Page 73 of Iridian

“Fuck.” What the hell could I even say to that?

Taland looked at me, that sad, desperate smile on his lips. “I’m trying to find a way to shut them out, but so far they’ve proven stronger. Sometimes they take over completely,” he said. “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t want to scare you. I thought I had it under control but when I sleep, I slip.”

I fell against his side with a sigh, looking at those trees again, and I wrapped my arms around his torso. “The only thing you should be sorry about is that you didn’t tell me.”

“I know,” Taland said. “I didn’t want to worry you. You’ve gone through enough already. I wanted to spare you.”

“And I want to smack you on the head right now, but I know it’s wrong, so I won’t do it.”

“I mean, I do deserve it,” Taland said, and I knew he was trying to make me feel better, but it didn’t work.

“Let’s just get inside.” I didn’t want to have to keep looking at those trees or be out here a second longer now that I knew what those names were.

Taland held me to his side, arm around my shoulders, and we went straight to the bedroom. I was no longer cold, but I slipped under the covers and welcomed the heat of his magic when he lay down with me and whispered a heating spell.

It was something to do, something to occupy my mind with until he got comfortable and started speaking.

“It started right away when I awakened them,” Taland said. “I told you before—I can hear them.”

“Yes, but I didn’t think that also included you waking up in the middle of the night to stab trees.”

He pulled me closer until we were face-to-face, our noses almost touching.

“I’ve been trying to keep them back, but it’s not working,” he whispered, not a hint of amusement in his voice.

“Why not?” I whispered back.

“Because they’re too strong.”

“But how did Titus do it? Did he go around stabbing trees and carving out their names, too?” Taland shook his head. “Do you think Hill would have agreed to bring them back to life if he knew they could literally take control of him like that?”

“Not for a second,” he admitted.

“So,it canbe done.” That’s what it sounded like to me.

“Yes,” Taland said. “It’s justmewho can’t do it.”

“Why not?”

“Because it requires me to…shut them downcompletely. To order them to stay silent.”

“And you won’t do that, because…?”

Taland closed his eyes and breathed in deeply for a moment. I reached out and touched his cheek, and his pain was my pain, so I felt my shoulders crushing together with him.

“They were tricked, sweetness,” he finally said. “Each and every one of these men who signed their souls to Titus were tricked. They were lied to. They were taken advantage of.” He swallowed hard, held my hand against his cheek. “I can hear their memories. Titus promised them freedom as soon as the war was over—he lied. Titus promised them that their families would be safe and taken care of—he lied to get them to give himtheir souls to link to, and now they can’t pass through to the other side.” Shivers rushed down my back. “I can hear the ones who’ve already been physically destroyed, too. They remain here still; they’re trapped, all of them. They can’trestin peace or in any kind of way—they’re trapped and they’re relentless and they just want to cross over. They just want this to beover.”

“Oh, my Goddess, Taland…”

“And every second of every day they’re speaking into my head,beggingme to release them.Screamingfor me to set them free so they can finally get the peace they deserve. They are so, so loud.”

Closing my eyes to release the tears that had pooled in them, I dragged myself closer and hugged him tightly, hid my face under his chin.

“Most of them were fathers. They all had families, people they loved. People they left behind for this. To silence them, I have to order them to keep all that pain to themselves, like Titus did. And I’m the only one who can hear them, sweetness. Nobody else can. Nobody elsehasfor seven hundred years.”

My shoulders shook as I cried, even though I was holding onto his body with all my strength.

“That’sawful,” I managed to choke out while he kissed my head and rubbed my back to get me to calm down.