Page 16 of All I Need

“Maybe,” I say noncommittally. I blow out a breath and look out at the beautiful landscape. It’s weird to feel more at home in the backyard of The Clover Leaf Inn than in the house I lived in for the past two years. Never once since the day I moved in did Gary tell me that his home was mine. We were supposed to be building a life together and I missed every single sign that pointed me to the bright yellow light that was screaming CAUTION! RUN! RUN THE OTHER WAY! “I don’t have anywhere else to go,” I admit. Nor do I have anywhere else I want to go, but I don’t add that. I’m a grown woman. If I wanted to be somewhere else, I would be.

“You’re not stupid, Ellie. If you missed signs, it wasn’t because you were stupid.”

“You a mind reader, too, Miss Polly?”

Her smile is sad when she says, “No, but the signs are there. I see the wheels churning and I remember the thoughts I had to beat down after I found out my husband had been cheating on me before he died in a car accident.”

“Yeah, well, this wasn’t the first time my fiancé cheated on me.”

Her eyes widen. “He was a repeat offender?”

I laugh but it’s void of any humor. “Oh no. That might have actually been better. I was engaged to another man several years ago. Though, the woman he cheated on me with was a one night stand. I still don’t know if he would have told me about it but the circumstances were such that he had to come clean. I found out a week before we were supposed to get married.”

Without a word she gets off the swing and marches into the house. When she returns, she’s carrying a chilled bottle of vodka. Unscrewing the top, she motions for me to lift my glass and pours some into my lemonade then some in her own glass. The swing squeaks a bit when she sits back down.

I try not to laugh but she’s so damn funny I can’t help myself. She clinks her glass against mine and nods her head in a manner I know she wants me to take a drink. Together we finish our vodka lemonades until the glasses are nothing but remnants of melting ice.

“You should warn a girl before you go and drop a bomb like that one,” Polly says as she leans down to lift the bottle, pouring us each a hefty shot.

“I could say the same to you when you delivered your news about walking in on your ex-husband with your ex-best friend.”

“I figured it was the best way to get you to open up. Nothing says bonding like understanding what someone else is going through.”

I take a drink and relish the burn the clear alcohol makes as it slides down my throat. “How’d you know?”

“You’re still wearing his ring, Walker said he saw you about to demolish his car, and not that you’re not one of the prettiest things I’ve ever seen right now sitting on my porch throwing back vodka like a champ,” she nods to my once again empty glass, “but yesterday you looked another brand of gorgeous.” She taps her temple and winks. “Plus, I’m pretty good at reading people. And you, my girl, are pissed.”

“Well, yeah,” I scoff. “He…”

“No, honey. At yourself.”

I press my lips together as tears spring back into my eyes. She’s right. After Michael cheated, I swore I’d never let a man into my life again unless I knew for certain he wasn’t going to jerk me around. For close to a decade I kept barbed wire around my heart and it worked. Then Gary came along and he wined and dined and wooed me like I was a prize to be won and I fell for every moment of it. Like an idiot.

“I knew better,” I whisper.

“Love has a funny way of clouding our thoughts.”

“No. That’s not even it. I look back now and I don’t think I ever really loved him. Not the way that a woman loves a man she’s about to marry. And, obviously, he returned the same feelings. When I walked in on him with Crystal, you want to know what my first thought was? It was Damn, I really wanted to go to Turks and Caicos. It had nothing at all to do with the fact that I wasn’t getting married to Gary. It wasn’t anything to do with him. I wanted to go on that freaking honeymoon, dammit.”

“That is a bummer. I’ve heard it’s gorgeous.”

“Me too. I was so excited to sit around on a beach and drink fruity drinks and sink my toes into the white sand. Maybe do some snorkeling. Stupid Gary. I should have just gone without him.”

“So go. What’s holding you back?”

“I considered it. When I left with all our luggage, tickets, passports… I planned on driving straight to the airport.”

“What stopped you?”

“Walker.”

Her eyes light up and I’m quick to explain with a smirk. “He found me lightening my luggage.”

She giggles. “That’s one way to say it.”

I sigh and turn on the swing so I’m facing her. “If Walker hadn’t stopped on the side of the road, I would have gone to the airport, gotten on a plane and headed to the island by myself. From there I would have wallowed in self-pity over the fact that two men in my life vowed to love me forever after asking me to be their wife then decided ‘eh, never mind. I’ll keep screwing other women while lying to her.’ Of course, he also stopped me from taking that golf club to Gary’s car. I guess I should probably thank Walker and Grayson for stepping in.”

“Walker’s intuitive like that. He’s always known what other people need.”

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