Page 57 of All I Need

I WAKE UP WITH A cheery smile on my face that I can’t seem to wipe off no matter how hard I try. Who knew this tiny town in Michigan would be what breathes life back into me. A place where I feel the most like myself than I have in my entire life.

Rolling over, I hug my pillow and press the side of my face into it, my arm stretching out underneath. The sheets are cool against my heated skin. Heated from a long evening of dreams of Walker that had me sliding a hand between my thighs.

I sigh, hardly believing how intense my physical reaction is to thoughts of Walker. Even now I have to rub my legs together to alleviate the ache already building inside just remembering how it felt to have his lips on mine in a chaste kiss or the way his hand molded to my leg as if it was always meant to be there.

Last night.

Wow.

I helped bring a baby calf into the world.

I mean, I didn’t really do anything but gag and squeal but still… I was there. I saw life happening and it was amazing. It’s not lost on me that it was a cow. A. Cow. Not a human life but it was real and I’ve never seen anything like that before. I didn’t have siblings or cousins and my parents—sucky as they were—didn’t really have any friends with kids. Which is a lot of the reason why they hated having me around to cramp their style.

Throwing the covers off me, I grab some clothes and make my way to the bathroom. Pressing the little green app on my phone, I find the playlist I’m looking for. When the upbeat sound of Kelsea Ballerini’s voice filters through the remarkably good speaker of my phone, I turn up the volume and hop in the shower.

I sing along to the happy lyrics, my hips shimmying back and forth while I shampoo my hair.

I don’t remember the last time I felt this happy, this free.

My good mood stays with me while I pour myself a cup of coffee and help Miss Polly make some breakfast for the two of us. Her smile tells me that she knows exactly where my happiness is stemming from but I don’t care.

“I’ll see you later. If you need me to grab anything from the store on my way home, just let me know, okay?”

Emotion clouds her features and I wonder if it’s because I called her house my home or if there‘s another reason for it.

“I will. You have a good day,” she tells me and then I’m out the door, travel mug of coffee in hand. Walker had told me last night that I didn’t need to be in right at the beginning of the morning. I had briefly considered texting Courtney to see if she wanted to meet for coffee but I didn’t want to seem pushy or needy. She mentioned wanting to get together but I highly doubt she meant less than twelve hours later.

Instead, I shoot off a text, hoping that we can get something planned. I know I need to open myself up to people. Let them in. Trust might not come easy for me to share but I’ve never really felt like myself before either.

Me: Hey, Courtney! This is Ellie. Just wanted to text you so you have my number. If you still want to grab coffee or something, I’d love to get together soon. Hope Camilla is doing well.

I stare at the screen, re-reading my words to make sure I’m not coming across as a crazy stalker lady and decide to just hit send. I toss my phone back into my purse and drive the short trip to Walker’s clinic. My phone pings along the way and I grab it after parking my car next to Walker’s pickup.

Courtney: Hey girl! Thank you for the number. Yes. Yes. Yes. We are absolutely going to meet up. Let’s do dinner. I am so excited to hang out with ya. There’s a killer Mexican place in town. Do you like Mexican?

Me: Who doesn’t?

Courtney: Right? Ugh. So. Good. Okay—does Monday night work? Or this weekend. Oooh whenever.

Courtney: OMG I’m sorry. I’m coming across as kind of needy.

Courtney: I promise I’m not!

Courtney: But I really like you and want to be friends.

Courtney: NEVER MIND. I’M AN IDIOT.

I decide it’s time to stop her from her rambling texting, though it makes me feel remarkably better about my own excitement to get together soon.

Me: Never mind, you don’t want to be friends?

Courtney: NO! I do! I just am such a moron in text.

Me: Oh hush.You are not. I was close to asking you to meet for coffee this morning already so no judgement here.

Courtney: Phew. We can be crazy friend stalkers together! **high five emoji**

Me: Right on! **hand okay emoji**

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