Page 71 of All I Need

I’VE NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE TERM blue balls as much as I do right now. It’s been one month since the night of margaritas with Ellie. One. Month.

A month of stolen kisses and hand holding. Of quiet lunches together and evening walks with Brutus. Evenings are spent like we’re in high school again, texting or talking on the phone when we can’t see each other in person.

At least three or four times a week I stop at Miss Polly’s before work and we share coffee on the back patio. Sometimes we make breakfast together or I’ll stop at McDonald’s and bring it over, oddly enough it’s Miss Polly’s favorite and Ellie doesn’t complain.

I’m falling harder and harder for her and really don’t know how much longer I can handle this whole going slow thing. It’s my own fault, of course, for suggesting it. But as much as it pains me—literally—to keep it up, I’m glad we are. Everything I said to her that night was the truth. She deserves to know that I’m willing to go slow for her. That really, she’s all I need.

It’s Thursday night and as is usual lately, I run home quickly after work, shower, change, grab Brutus, and head back to Ellie’s house. I haven’t had her over to my place yet. I know once I get her alone, all bets will be off and I’m still holding steady on not pushing this thing between us.

Brutus and I walk through the door, he’s been here so often lately that Ellie bought him his own food and water dish. He barks a couple times to make his presence known and sniffs around, searching for his target.

He finds her standing in the kitchen, stirring something around in a big Dutch oven pot on the stove. She looks over her shoulder and picks up something off a cutting board and gives it to Brutus.

“I’m making jambalaya and saved a few pieces of sausage for him. I hope that’s okay.”

So sweet.

Thoughtful.

Ellie’s the same way with Grayson. If she knows he’s going to be with me, she makes sure to cook extra food so he’s not hungry. A few times, she’s packaged the leftovers for him to take home to Willow when she’s been working extra shifts. But her thoughtfulness doesn’t end there. One day Ellie was out shopping at a local sporting goods store and found a couple t-shirts she thought Grayson would like, which he did, and picked them up for him just because. She spends extra time with Miss Polly and is learning to knit with her because it makes Miss Polly happy to have someone to knit with at home.

Even the pets at the clinic seem happier. There’s always fresh cut flowers on the counter and homemade doggy treats in the containers.

“Of course it’s okay. It smells delicious.”

She smiles at me and returns her focus on stirring the meat, rice and spice mixture. The oven timer goes off and she hands me an oven mitt. “Would you mind getting the corn bread out of the oven for me?”

“Sure thing.”

Domestic blue ball bliss. That’s what this is.

I place the warm corn bread on another oven mitt so it doesn’t scorch the countertop and spin around, watching her work. She’s so beautiful. Even after working in a vet clinic all day, her hair haphazardly thrown up in a messy bun on top of her head and wearing a baggy t-shirt and leggings.

“Ellie?”

“Hmm?”

“Can I tell you something?”

“Is everything okay?” she asks, worry in her voice.

“Yes.”

“What is it?”

“You’re beautiful.”

“Thank you,” she says quietly. If I had told her that six weeks ago, she would have thought I was lying so I could get her to bend to my will about something. Those two words, her simply thanking me for that shows a level of trust I wasn’t sure I would ever get from her.

“I mean it, Ellie,” I say, pushing off the counter to stand next to her. I take the spoon out of her hand and lay it on the spoon rest on the stove. Taking her in my arms, I kiss her on the lips, lingering a touch longer than normal. “Sometimes when I’m around you, I’m speechless. Your beauty takes my breath away.”

“Walker,” she sighs happily.

“I want you to always remember that. You’re so beautiful to me.”

“You’re not so bad yourself, handsome.”

I grin and pretend to be embarrassed. “Aww shucks.”

After we eat dinner with Miss Polly, the two of us go into the backyard so Brutus can roll around outside, his favorite after dinner pastime.

“Sit with me, Ellie girl,” I tell her, resting against the back of the swing, my arm going around her as soon as she cozies up next to me.

She tucks her legs under her and slides an arm around my stomach, nestling in close. Hopefully she doesn’t graze any farther south or she’ll get a hell of a surprise. She’s so sexy, fits so perfectly in my arms. I let my hand settle on her leg, trying hard to keep it at a safe spot but I can’t stop my thumb from rubbing against the thin material of her leggings.

Ellie turns her face up to look at me and I bend low, kissing her gently. My tongue glides along the seam of her mouth and she opens for me. The kiss is sweet and gentle and full of so much promise. My hand is still on her leg but my determination has slipped, allowing my hand to slip closer to where I so badly want to be.

She withdraws her mouth from mine just a breath away and says, “I’m not going to handle slow much longer.” I don’t have time to respond before she presses her lips against mine again.

Yeah. I couldn’t agree with her more.

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