Page 47 of Gone for You

“Dork.”

“You keep calling me that and I’ll develop a complex.”

“You love it.” I kind of do. It’s the weirdest term of endearment ever but I love the playful teasing quality to it.

“Lies. Anyway, guess.”

“Fine. You win.”

“I love to win.”

“Okay, um, you got a new dart board?”

Why would she say that? “What? No. What’s wrong with the dart board?”

“Nothing. Just… it’s old, and I figured… never mind. Hmm, you got a dog.”

“Nope.”

“You had a good poop.”

Laughing, I say, “Wow. There’s really no subject off limits now, huh?”

“I admitted to my farting problem so no, we might as well lay it all out there.”

“Since you clearly have no imagination, I’ll go ahead and tell you. You’ve been invited to a party.”

“Ooh the last time I was invited to a party, I got lucky.”

“What a coincidence! Same here!”

“Technically, you weren’t invited.”

“Pssh. Technicalities. I still got pretty damn lucky.”

“So what kind of party did I get invited to?”

“Another birthday party.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Mm hmm. There will be cake and pizza. Streamers and balloons. Everything a boy could ask for.”

“Candles?”

“I’m sure. What’s a birthday without blowing candles out on a cake?”

“Blowing.” Snort.

“Ha! You’re so immature.”

“Horny. The word is horny, Ethan. It’s been a month and I’m tired of not getting any. Do you know what the summer heat does to a woman?”

“Well, no, because I’m not a woman, but Iamglad to hear you’re not getting any while I’ve been gone.”

“What about you?”

“Little pissed you’d even ask but no, I haven’t gotten any either. Besides my hand. That’s getting a lot of action lately.”

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