I shush them and make a point to show that there are little ears present.
A few stretch their lips out to make an eek face and a few just shrug, as if they know they didn’treallysay anything bad. The girls aren’t paying attention to their moms, though, and the one dad in the room is just doing his best to pretend he didn’t hear anything.
Taking a deep breath, I try to shake off their words. I’m smiling, though. How could I not? For one, it feels good to have their jealousy. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t. But knowing that others see the connection makes it feel a bit more real.
“Okay, girls, time for class. Head on in,” I say to the students, trying to redirect the conversation. I have no doubt they’ll be gabbing about it while I’m teaching their girls the next dance routine but I can’t worry about it. Besides, they’re good moms. Good friends. I’ve never gotten the catty vibe from them. There are a few women in town, I’m sure, who will be trying to latch themselves onto Reed. Who could blame them? He’s the hot new single dad in town, but if I have anything to say about it, he won’t be single for long.
That thought has me grinning through the entire dance routine, especially when Emmy stands at the back of the class, watching so carefully and wanting to be like the big girls. Doing her best to copy their routine even though she doesn’t have the coordination for some of the moves quite yet. However, it’s impressive, really, to see how she can pick up on it. Her plié is practically perfect and she’s only attended one class. When we started class she participated as best she could with their stretches and when she watched their barre work, she couldn’t tear her eyes away. I have no doubt she’ll be fun to teach, excited to learn.
After an hour in class, the girls are sweaty and breathing heavy, sipping water from their bottles they left at the doorway. We don’t allow drinks in the room normally, but these girls push themselves harder than most. They have privileges others don’t. Still, they know they have to stand on the mat by the door if they want to take a drink. We keep the dance floor as clean as possible.
Emmy jumps right into the middle of the girls and they accept her quickly. She asks them questions and shows off her own moves. A few of them help her by holding her arms as she tries to extend one leg behind the other to perform an arabesque. Her smile is beaming when she catches my attention, her little hands splayed out beside her and her toes on the raised foot are pointed as best she can, exactly like she’d seen the girls do in class.
“Look, Miss Sadie!”
I clap proper like I’m watching her on Broadway and she giggles. “I see, Emmy! You’re a natural.”
After she’s back on two feet, I tell her to curtsy and she giggles harder but obliges after I show her how. The girls tell her and me goodbye and gather their things, heading out the door to meet their moms.
“Did you have fun?”
“Yes! I love dancing.”
“Me, too.”
We walk out of the room and are greeted by Reed. Emmy runs to his arms and for a brief second I’m jealous of a five-year-old. I wouldn’t mind being lifted up by those strong arms again. “What’d you think?”
“It was awesome!” Her tiny fist propels into the air in her excitement.
Reed chuckles, setting her back down and kisses her cheek. He’s not shy about showing his daughter affection in public and I love that. In the short amount of time I’ve seen the two of them together, I’ve witnessed him kissing or hugging her many times. It seems natural to them both and I sincerely hope for both their sakes it doesn’t end. “Glad you had fun. Ready to eat?”
“Uh huh! I’m hungry.” Emmy’s bouncing on her toes, excited to go out to eat. Energy abounds with her — after the class the big girls were tired and she did her best to keep up with them. It’s a wonder she’s not dead on her feet after a full day of school, too.
“Me, too.” Reed grins down at his daughter with so much affection and love. It would be impossible not to notice that his little girl is his world.
“I just need to change clothes and gather my things. Want me to meet you there?”
“Nah. We’ll wait, if that’s okay. You can ride with us, right, Emmy?”
She’s nodding quickly and oh shoot, how could I say no to her big brown eyes so much like her dad’s? If I thought I was in over my head with Reed, the duo is worse.
“All right then. Just give me a minute.”
“Need any help?” Reed asks, raising an eyebrow.
I shake my head and narrow one eye at his orneriness. “I think I can handle it.”
“If you’re sure,” he presses. I know good and well he’s not going to leave his daughter alone so he and I can go into my office while he “helps” me get changed but I kind of love the fact that he’s teasing me about it.
Back in the day, he’d tease me often and it always gave me a little flutter of happiness in my chest.
“I’m sure. It will only take me a few minutes to change.”
I escape into my office and shut the door behind me, very aware of the fact that Reed knows I’m stripping down and wondering if it’s affecting him the way I hope it is. It reminds me of the first time I relaxed while I was working at Eve’s Gentlemen’s Club; the sensual feeling of removing the silky robe as I got into my routine. Until that day, every time I’d lose an article of clothing in front of the guests, I’d be overwhelmed with nerves. Then suddenly one day something clicked and I felt comfortable on stage. Rather than clamming up, it was as if I’d lose a part of myself. A part that was hindering me from being myself. It was freeing to be on stage and know that men — and women — liked to watch me.
Eve’s was only a topless club, which meant I never had to expose myself fully. Even as it was, I rarely took off my top once I became established as what the owner called a “premium dancer”.
Something triggers inside me, though. Something that brings back my time there and wants to relive it but only for Reed. I want to dance for him on the pole that’s set up in my spare bedroom. Strip down to nothing and watch his eyes darken and chest rise and fall as he sits in a chair, not allowed to touch me. It’s the greatest kind of high.