Page 22 of Without You

Katie

“You can’t be serious.”

He shrugs his shoulders, not caring. “Sorry, Katie. It’s just not working out.”

My jaw drops then snaps closed before opening again. “But… you’re my dad.”

Daddy shrugs and looks away from me, fiddling with his beard. “That’s why I’m doing this.”

“You can’t be serious,” I repeat. “What am I supposed to do?”

Now he just looks nervous because he has no answer for me. “Your mama and I need this.”

“I’m not denying that but…” I take a deep breath and will the tears to stay away.

“We want what’s best for you, darling, you know we do. But you’re relying on this. On us.”

“Of course I am!” I cry.

“And that’s why it’s time. You know we love you but we’re,” he pauses and lowers his voice as if he’s about to say something scandalous, “concerned.”

My heart beats a little faster at the word concerned and I bite my lower lip to stop it from trembling. Growing up, concern over me was a thing, kind of like being disappointed in me. Concern meant worried and worried made me feel guilty and nervous.

“Concerned?” I whisper.

“Yes,” he says quietly. He repeats what he was saying earlier, “You’re relying on us and not trying.”

“Not trying? I’m going to school and working for you at the same time, how is that not trying?”

“Are you going to just keep repeating everything I say or are we going to have a conversation?”

I release my lip and blow out a breath. “Have a conversation,” I murmur.

“What’s going on, Katie?”

I shrug, my face downturned so I’m looking at the desk rather than his face. He knocks once on the desk to get my attention and he offers me his “dad look” that says he already knows but he wants me to admit it to him. “Talk to me.”

“It all got so screwed up.”

“What did?”

“My life,” I answer miserably. “Everything about it. I used to have it all planned so well. I had goals and I knew what I wanted to accomplish. It felt like my life was all over the place and I couldn’t catch up. And it feels so weird to be in school again. Like, I was a failure earlier in life.”

“Maybe it’s time to stop looking at this left turn like it’s a bad thing and take it for the second chance that it is. You have a clean slate, kiddo. Take advantage of that. Do what you want to do rather than what you think you have to do. Like learning how to be a massage therapist. Who cares that you realized it later? It’s not like you’re seventy and just starting a new job. You’re still young.”

“Well, what I have to do now is have a job that pays me enough money so I can move out of your house.”

“Don’t be a smart ass, Katelyn Marie. I’m trying to help you. You should know that by now.”

Nodding, I say, “I understand and I’m sorry. I’m frustrated.”

“Yeah. I get that. You had four months to pull your head out of your ass and get over it, too.”

My jaw drops because Daddy never cusses. “Dad!”

“I’m old and I’m allowed to lose my filter. Don’t judge me.”

I giggle and lean back in my chair, letting my head fall back, too. “So y’all are kicking me out of my home, huh?”

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