Page 47 of Without You

“Thinking I might benefit from holding out then. You about done eating?”

I shake my head. “No. I have half of my burger left and more fries.”

“Think you can eat a little quicker?”

I give him a look that I hope looks more serious than what I’m feeling. “B. This is a barbecue bacon cheeseburger from Murphy’s. You don’t quickly eat it. You savor it.”

He chuckles and shifts once again so he’s leaning back against the couch. “My mistake,” he murmurs.

“You’re forgiven.”

We continue to make small talk as I eat — he’s already finished his meal — wanting me to rush through it but I wasn’t lying when I said that I wanted to savor it because whoever runs the kitchen at Murphy’s knows what they’re doing. It’s been a Benton staple forever. Long before my parents moved here. Will last for years, too. They make other items other than just burgers, but if you go there for a grilled chicken sandwich, you might as well wear a bag over your head because I’m pretty sure the residents of Benton will boo you on your way out. The burgers are just that good. I think they’d turn a vegetarian into a carnivore.

The second I’m finished, my hands wiped on a napkin and balled up, placed aside, he motions me over with his hand. “C’mere, Katie.”

“So demanding,” I say as I get up, completely willing.

He pulls me down so I’m sitting right next to him, tucks me under his arm, and kisses me on the side of the head.

“This is what I needed. Just you and me chilling out talking about our days.”

By the heated looks he was giving me moments ago, I’d really expected at the very least another make-out session but apparently he just wants to cuddle. I’m not sure what that means. “Just this, huh?”

“Just this,” he confirms.

I know he feels me stiffen with worry next to him. He gives me a squeeze and asks, “What’s wrong?”

I push against his chest so I can sit up and look up at him. “I just thought…” I trail off, not wanting to come off a certain way.

“Just thought that I was coming over here for more than burgers and talking?”

I bite my lip and shrug. “Yes, and no, I guess. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like this, too. But we haven’t really discussed what’s happening here between us.” I mention, motioning between us. I hate not knowing where I stand with him. Sure, he’s said he likes me, calls me pretty, kissed me and is affectionate, but that could literally mean anything anymore. Dating is weird and while I don’t think of Brody as a one-night stand kind of guy, or even a guy who’d fool around with a girl he wasn’t serious about, how the heck am I supposed to know? “I think I just need to hear the words, I guess?” I admit.

He folds his hand over mine. “You need me to spell out what’s happening here?”

I rub my lips together and wish I’d have thought of throwing on some lipstick earlier. It’s a bit of armor for me, giving me confidence. “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d appreciate it.”

His eyes hold mine when he explains, “I don’t do casual. Not to say that I can’t do it on the way to serious, but in this particular case, I have no desire to do casual. I like spending time with you. Don’t get me wrong, I really want to spend some of that time without clothes on, but we’ve got time for that. I want us to take our time and not rush. But if you need to hear me say the words, I want to take you on real dates, not just picking up food and eating it at home, and do everyday things together. I have no intentions of doing the things I’d like to do with you with anyone else, and I may not have the right to ask this, but I’d really like it if I was the only one doing them with you, too.”

“Yes,” I whisper, my hands linked together and because my eyes are locked on his, I could fortunately see the brilliance that hit his eyes when I responded. Brody Redding has many looks I’m incredibly fond of, but this, right here, might be my favorite. Not just because he’s so incredibly handsome I can barely handle it, but because I’m the one who put that happiness in him so bright that it’s shining on the outside.

“Yes,” he replies in agreement, kissing my lips once, twice, then slipping his tongue out to taste mine for a short kiss. The rest of the night is spent watching episodes of Stranger Things, our bodies pressed close together.

We haven’t done more than kissing and heavy petting in the short time we’ve been spending time together and even though I needed clarification as to why he was only wanting to relax together tonight, I’m honestly not ready for anything more than that. Being together is exactly what I needed, too. Spending time with him and learning more about each other.

It’s enough.

For now.

* * *

Five weeks later

I was so excited to graduate from massage therapy school. I couldn’t wait. Now look at me. Just look at me. The last month of classes were intense, to say the least, but I may have seriously underestimated how hard it would be to go actually do the work I’ve been learning to do. It’s only been a week and I’m exhausted and overwhelmed. My professors warned me that until my muscles got used to the extra work, it would be pretty tiring. They weren’t lying.

I thought being in class all day long and working for my daddy at night was a lot of work, but that was nothing in comparison.

I’m.

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