Page 103 of Together

“You little tease.”

“But you love me.”

“Yup. I do. Let me show you?”

“You don’t have to ask.”

“Hot damn, I just won the lottery.”

I tug her behind me to my bedroom, passing the room that she’s been staying in. I still can’t believe I got her convinced to move in. If there’s anything positive that came out of the damn near heart attack I had after hearing that she was in the accident, I suppose that’s it.

“You’re not staying in there anymore,” I tell her, motioning to the spare room. The minute she agreed to move in, I wanted her in my bed but knew I shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, as my grandmother used to say. Be grateful we made that step. And I was grateful for it. I needed the reassurance that she was healthy and happy. That she wasn’t going to experience any late trauma or whatever from the accident. She gave me the gift of moving into my home and I could return with a gift of patience.

But my patience has run out. Hearing those three words from her sent me into overdrive. Slow mode is gone, replaced with pressing on the fast forward button. I don’t want to rush our time together, but I’m so damn eager for the next steps I can’t seem to tell my brain to relax.

“I’m not?” She’s amused. Happy. Seemingly on board and I’m going to cling to that.

“Fuck no. You’re in my bed from here on out.”

“So bossy.”

I spin around and wrap my arm around her, walking backward. I’d love to pin her against the wall, take her right here, but first of all, that’s not necessarily conducive to her current state, and second of all, I finally have her as mine, not just the two of us needing to scratch an itch or giving into our desires. We’re going to take our time together and I’m going to learn every inch of her body that I haven’t taken the time to explore yet. “Only bossy when it comes to the fun stuff.”

She smiles and the sight of it takes my breath away. “I like the fun stuff.”

“Me, too. We should get to the fun stuff more often.” I pause in the threshold of my bedroom. “I lied. I’m going to be bossy about a lot more than just when we’re in the bedroom.”

She slides her hands up my sides and around the back of my neck, playing with my hair. “Oh?”

“Yeah. Like wanting to keep you safe.”

“Kind of experienced that already with the accident.”

“Oh, trust me, I was holding back. You have no idea how much.”

“That was you holding back?” she asks, her eyes wide. Makes sense. I was a complete basket case for a few weeks. I’m still holding back, though. She doesn’t need to see how anxious it makes me.

“It was. I’ll probably boss you around about letting me take care of you,” I tell her, quieting my voice. Her eyes soften a little. “I’ll boss you around when I feel like it’s time for us to have a break together, even if it means we have to leave the baby with my sister for a few hours. Because there will never be a time that I won’t put us first. And, this is a big one,” I warn.

“What is it?” she asks, her chin trembling.

“I’m going to be very bossy when it comes to the fact that I want to marry you. Sooner rather than later. I want you and the baby to have my last name, to sign a paper that legally bonds us together for the rest of our lives. I want us to have more babies once this one is old enough and we’re ready again. I want to take family vacations and also mommy and daddy only vacations where I drag you to the airport and you’re sad until we arrive on a Caribbean island for a week of you and me and sex and sand and sun and you realize that I was right and being away from the kids is okay. I want us to visit your parents, but not on Christmas morning because that’s reserved for our family. I want us to burn dinner together and watch terrible movies and fight over finances and whose turn it is to change a dirty diaper and for you to get annoyed with me when you have to take the kids to all their appointments and demand I step up. I want all of it. The good and the bad in between because the good can’t be good unless we know what the bad is like. Then we’ll appreciate the good even more. And our kids will appreciate the goodness that we have in our house.”

“Oh my gosh,” she whispers. “Nik…”

“I love you. When I said those words earlier, they weren’t for show or said without me thinking it over. I meant them with every single fiber of my being. You need to know that I am completely in love with you. If you’re not totally there, I’ll wait. I’ll wait as long as you need for us to be on the same page.”

“I’m there.”

“You’re…” My heart beats double time as I stare at her for one beat, two beats, three before I close my eyes and lean my forehead against hers, breathing her in.

Guiding her to the bed, I have her sit down then go to my dresser, digging through the top drawer.

When I find what I’m looking for, I walk back to Ashley, and drop to one knee.

“Ashley.”

She gasps and I smile.

---