Page 39 of Together

He sits back, knees up against the dash, and turns his head toward me. “It’s going to be okay, Ashley. I promise. I’ll be there every single step of the way and we’ll get through it together.”

When Nik grabs my hand and squeezes once, something inside me chips away and I lower a few of the defenses I had built up around my heart. Becoming vulnerable to another person is risky and I admit, at least to myself, that it’s one of the reasons I’ve not had successful relationships in the past. “You promise? Because I’ve gotta be honest here. I’m scared out of my mind to do this.”

“To do what specifically?”

“Become a mom. Make decisions that affect another person’s life.”

“And where do I fit into this equation? Do I factor into any of this fear?”

I blow out a breath and fiddle with my purse’s shoulder strap. “You don’t scare me,” I admit, “but not knowing you does.”

“We’ll fix that, though. Remember when you called to tell me the appointment time, I told you I would clear the rest of the day to spend with you. I did that and I’m planning on it. We can go wherever it is you feel most comfortable and I don’t care if you ask me questions all day long, just as long as at the end of the day you realize that I’m not going to bail on you.”

“We need to meet each other’s families, too,” I add. It’s not at the top of our list of things to do, but does need to happen. We live close to them and they’re a big part of our lives separately, they will be a major part of this baby’s life, too.

He nods once. “Whenever you’re ready for that, too.”

“You’re being too perfect,” I grumble.

“Want me to act like an asshole?” he jokes. “I’m not always perfect, Ashley. Far from it, actually. I have my moments like everyone else. But when it comes to this baby and what you need from me? I’m there for you and that won’t change.”

I can’t imagine Zachary would have been the same if I had gotten pregnant by him. He would have said I was trapping him and blamed me. He wouldn’t have cleared his schedule to spend the day with me just to answer any questions I have for him. Keeping my heart intact and not falling for Nik will be hard to do if he doesn’t lessen the perfection he’s sporting. Would it be so hard for him to be a jerk for a minute or two? At the very least, he could have an acne flare-up so when he’s being perfect he isn’t so damn attractive.

“Let’s go inside. Sitting here isn’t helping to calm my nerves.”

“It’ll be…”

“Fine,” I interrupt. “I know. I know.”

When we’re walking toward the clinic, I reach over and grab Nik’s hand. It feels like a bold move, and maybe one that’s going to backfire, but I need stability and a little bit of comfort right now. Luckily, he doesn’t flinch or seem to mind. He simply folds my small hand into his, pulling me closer.

Then in a bold move of his own, he tugs on my arm, leans down, and kisses the top of my head.

“We’ve got this. No more worries, okay?”

I nod, swallow hard, and look up at him.

Well. The baby will be pretty, that’s for sure.

* * *

“Five more weeksand we can hear the baby’s heartbeat? Why so long?” he pouts as we sit down for an early lunch at the diner. “It’s the twenty-first century. You’d really think they’d be able to stick that Doppler thing to your stomach and they’d hear the heartbeat without having to shove that thing up your vagina.”

Shrugging out of my coat, I grin at Nik’s grumpiness as I hang my coat on the back of my chair. I’m incredibly proud of myself that I didn’t even flinch at the word vagina. It’s not that the term bothers me, but I’m shy in public. “You’re the one who said it was up to me.”

“I didn’t realize that you would remember that when we were in the room, though.”

I snort. “So that’s how it’s going to be, huh?”

He folds his arms, placing his elbows on the table and leans over. “Just had hopes you’d come to your senses,” he teases.

“I’m all about the buildup. Patience is a virtue, right?”

“It’s going to kill me. And in case you’re wondering, that means that I’m also all about finding out the sex of the baby as soon as they say we can. We’ve had enough surprises for a while, I think.”

“Definitely,” I agree. I was hoping for the same thing anyway, so much like buying a new car, this is also something I’m on board with. That has to be a good sign, that the two of us agree on fairly big decisions.

The waitress stops at our table, handing us each a menu and placing silverware on the table. “Hi there. Did you have a chance to see our specials on the board when you walked in?”

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