Page 70 of Together

“When I saw you in the store that day, before I even saw the test in your hand, I knew I was given the gift of a second chance. You’d told me three months. Well, it’s been three months,” I remind her, smirking. “We may have broken that rule along the way but that’s just God’s way of nudging us together, if you ask me. I’m not asking you to marry me or promising anything but I feel deep in my gut that whatever this is between us is a lot more than just chemistry. Though, I’ve gotta say, the chemistry between us is pretty strong.”

“It really is,” she says, from her place on my lap. I pulled her close somewhere between her childhood vacation stories and when I told her our child would not be named Fraser, after Jamie Fraser inOutlander. She tried pouting, even though it was all for show, and I pulled her onto my lap and kissed her. That’s where she stayed and I have no intentions of that changing. At least until after we have this conversation.

“Is that all it is to you? Sexual chemistry?”

“No,” she admits. “I agree with you about wanting to be together to see where this goes between us. But I also think that defining whatever this is could set us back. I like the way things are.”

“Casual, you mean?” I ask, my heart not liking that one bit.

“Not casual, no. I don’t like that idea.” She scrunches her nose, playing with the hair on the back of my neck. She likes to do that, I’ve discovered. Which means I need to keep my hair at this length all the time.

“What do you mean, then?”

“I don’t know. Saying you’re my boyfriend feels like I just shot back to high school but saying that you’re the father of my unborn child isn’t what I want to say, either. For me, I like what we are. I like spending time with you and sharing meals. I like being open with each other about how we’re feeling. If this is going to work, though, because we’ve both sucked royally in the past when it comes to relationships, I think it would be better if we don’t put pressure on ourselves.”

“You understand that I want you, right? That I see something in the future between us that’s more than this baby?” I ask, placing my hand on her stomach.

She covers my hand with hers and nods. “I see it, too. But I’m so scared. If it doesn’t work because we’re trying too hard, it’s not only us that’s going to suffer for it. We’ve got this little one to think about now, too.”

That makes sense. I might not like it, but I do agree with it. And I understand. Mostly, anyway. I want her but she’s right — we’ve not made healthy choices for relationships in the past so maybe this is our chance to learn from our mistakes and move forward. Together.

“I’ll make you a deal.”

“What kind of deal?”

I lean up and kiss her neck. “Well, the kind that we both benefit from.”

“I’m listening.”

“The deal is…” I kiss just below her ear and tug on her earlobe with my teeth.

“…Yes?” She’s panting and when I let my hand slide under her shirt and up to her chest, she releases a little shiver that makes me smile.

“Are you agreeing to the deal?”

“Yes,” she moans then… “Wait. What’s the deal?”

I chuckle and sit back, giving her a break so we can finish this conversation with a clear head rather than controlled by our hormones. “Almost had you there,” I tease. “If I agree that we aren’t going to give us a name, I want you to tell me the second you’re ready for us to change that status. While I understand the hesitation you’re feeling about making anything official and agree with it, for the most part, I also want you to know that I’m ready for more between us. I’ll promise you that I won’t pressure you as long as you have an open mind about the potential that’s there for us. And in return for my herculean effort in practicing patience, you’ll reward me with…” I hesitate, loving the heated look that warms her face. “Not only that, you perv.” No shame in this one, she only grins and shrugs as if to ask who could blame her. “But for the record, if that’s what you want from me, just let me know and I’ll gladly provide. What I was going to say, though, is that I would like you to reward me with being the first, and I mean the first, to know when you’re ready. I don’t want you running to a friend to talk it over, or your sisters only for them to try to talk you out of it since they hated me before they knew me. I want you to promise me that when you’re feeling confident in who we are together, not just as two people who will be raising a child together, you call me, text me, send a carrier pigeon, whatever it is, so that I hear it first.”

“You really think my sisters would try to talk me out of it and I’d listen?”

“Not sure. But I don’t want to run the risk. They don’t know me. And, at least Grace isn’t willingtoget to know me. Until I know for certain that they’re not anti-Nik, I want us to keep this between us. I want this to work and if that means we keep our relationship, or whatever it is, private in order for that to happen, I’m okay with it.”

“What about Josie?”

“If you want me to leave her out of the loop, I will. I’m asking you to do that with your sisters, so I’ll do the same.”

“You would?”

“Of course. Let’s give us the best shot possible. I’ll be your dirty little secret,” I joke.

“Hmm,” she preens, leaning closer and kissing me. “That might be kind of fun.”

“Might be. I know the rest of what we do together sure as hell is.”

“I’m in.”

“Yeah?”

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