Page 96 of Radiant Shadows

He grinned cruelly. “I thought you might say that, and if that’s the route you choose to take, we have a feeding tube and IV on standby.”

My pulse skittered at his implication. The image of him forcing a tube down my throat after days of not eating or drinking… The meager food I had left in my belly threatened to surge upward. He was going to keep me here, come hell or high water, until I finally did what he said.

The powerlessness of my situation hit me, draining me of hope and defiance. There was nothing I could do. And for all mythreats, I didn’t think my spirit or my mind would last very long without food. I would break completely.

“Look, Arya,” he said, kneeling so that he was eye level with me, his expression showcasing a sympathy that didn’t touch his eyes. “We can avoid all that unpleasantness. It is not my desire to hurt you. Only to make you strong.”

He shifted sideways so that he could stretch his arm behind him and point at the struggling vampire.

“That creature wants you dead. Vampires killed your mother, and if given the chance, they will kill everyone you love. They arenotworth your empathy or your suffering. They are leeches that need to be eradicated, every last one of them.”

Though some part of me knew this nice-guy act was a ploy, I couldn’t deny the truth of his words. I would never forget finding my mother drained of blood in our kitchen. I would never forget Tobias lying half-dead in my arms. And though it wasn’t real, I would never forget how helpless and weak I felt as the simulated vampire nearly ended me my first time in a simulation.

The vampire sitting across from me sent me a pleading look. “I’m scared to die,” she whimpered. “But maybe it’s better this way. Please, just get it over with. I’m in so much pain.”

She shot a wild glance General Dracul’s way, and I got the distinct impression that she’d been in the military’s custody for some time. Who knew what manners of torture she’d already been through.

If she was even real. Would a real vampire beg to die? The tank and Leya had been a simulation. What if this was, too? What if I was putting my health, sanity, and pride on the line for an illusion? My head felt dizzy trying to determine what was real and what was not.

I dropped my shoulders in accepted defeat, and the general smiled and patted my knee. I looked back to the vampire, who nodded sadly at me, a resolute look in the young woman’s eyes. Or whatever age she was.

This was wrong. I felt that on so many levels, but I couldn’t see any other way out.

I closed my eyes as tears welled in them. I didn’t know this woman or what she’d done, assuming she was really even here. Maybe she was a horrible person deserving of death. Maybe she’d killed hundreds without a second thought.

Maybe she had been one of the vampires that killed my mother.

Holding onto those tiny kernels, I called on my siren voice.

“As soon as you are free, you will end your own life,” I said, the musical timbre vibrating through my bones.

The command landed, her body going stiff and her eyes empty of conscious emotion. A pair of soldiers came out from behind me and went about removing the restraints from her arms and legs, and all I could do was watch with a nauseating frost hardening in my gut.

The vampire stood free of her bonds and placed her hands on either side of her head. Then she pulled.

At the last second, I squeezed my eyes shut, unwilling to see the act I’d ordered being carried out to its conclusion. There was a sickening pop, and then two thuds and a soft rolling sound.

Tears streamed down my cheeks, but I couldn’t open my eyes. I didn’t want to see what I knew was in front of me.

General Dracul laughed. “Very good, Arya. Very good. Guards, take her back to her room and keep watch on her at all times. I want everyone caring for her to wear their earpieces. No exceptions. Understood?”

“Yes sir,” came two male voices.

The swish of fabric and clack of heels met my ears, and then I was being untied from the chair and tugged up to stand. I tried to keep my eyes closed as my escorts began to lead me away, but I had to know if it was real.

I glanced over my shoulder as I was taken out of the simulation room. The body and head were still there, the vacant eyes staring at me in accusation.

It had been real.

Bile rose in my throat once more, but I swallowed against it.

Someone had died by my doing. A stranger who, good or bad, probably had people who cared about her, people who would mourn her. A stranger who’d had a future, and now was nothing but a memory. The death hadn’t even been quick and merciful but gruesome and undoubtedly painful beyond measure. I’d done that, just as sure as if I’d been the one to pull off that vampire’s head myself.

I was officially a murderer. No better than the vampires who’d killed my mom. No better than the general himself. Some hero I was turning out to be.

I seethed as I caught sight of General Dracul standing over the body as if inspecting a new car.

Hewas the real murderer. I had just been the tool he used. I had to remember that.