Page 8 of Cruel Destinies

The heartache on Niko’s handsome face mirrored my own. He was leaving. Next week! We’d only just started dating. I wasn’t ready to lose him.

“What does this mean for us?” I finally asked in a small voice. “I don't want this to be over... I really like you. I think we could make this work, even with the distance.” I hoped he missed the uncertainty in my voice.

But with the tight smile he gave me, I knew he could tell how much I was hurting. He raised his hand to lightly tuck the wet, curly hair falling in front of my face, then cupped his palm around my cheek. This time, it was him that wanted me to look into his eyes.

“You're right. We can make this work. Because I really like you, too.” He leaned in and brushed his soft lips against mine, the kiss so sweet and filled with longing that I momentarily forgot how to breathe.

“So...when do you leave?” I asked when our lips parted, resting my forehead against his. I didn't want to cry in front of him. I wouldn't let myself.

“I don’t leave now. That’s what matters. But I do have to go in an hour to meet with my dad and the General for specifics. I’ll be back tomorrow morning, though.” His tone became sour but also reassuring at the same time.

“Wow. Well, I’ll let you get to it. I know you have a lot of people to tell. I’ll meet you at the platform doors in an hour.”

“Okay,” he said, letting out a shaky breath. “Thanks for understanding.”

I nodded, and we walked quietly back to the common room, where I both reluctantly and gratefully parted from him, rushing into my room, pressing my back against the closed door, and finally letting the tears fall.

Dammit! Why did this have to happen now? And why did I have to fucking cry? I wasn’t a crier. I’d hardly even cried when my mom died. I was the type of girl to shove that shit down into a box where it belonged. But these damn tears wouldn’t stop coming.

I needed to ground myself before I had to say goodbye. I needed to do it the way I knew best—alone and with my music blasting in my headphones.

I was a bit more composed after thirty minutes of peace when there was a knock on my door. I’d managed to wrangle my emotions into their box.

“Come in.” I slid my headphones off.

To my surprise, it was Igneaus who entered.

I fell back onto the bed with a loud and annoyed grunt. “I thought you were Arya.”

“Sorry to disappoint you,” he said with a hint of insult as he came to sit on the edge of my bed without invitation. “I heard the news about Niko and thought I’d come check on you.”

“Come to gloat, you mean?” I ground out.

He looked down at me with his bushy brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

I scoffed. “You know what I mean. Without the distraction, you’ll finally get your precious phoenix soldier back.”

He let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head as he turned away for a moment. “Ashlyn, I would never celebrate your unhappiness. I know… I know I haven’t been the best father, but I really do want what’s best for you. That’s the only reason I stayed away for so long.”

I didn’t respond, just continued to stare up at the ceiling.

“I just want you to know that I’m here for you,” he said when I remained silent. “Niko leaving isn’t the end of the world, but any time you feel sad about it, I hope that you’ll come talk to me. You and I are all we have.”

The truth of that dug into my chest like an earthworm burrowing through the cavities of my heart.

He got up and headed for the door, and I popped upward and perched on the edge of my bed.

“Dad, wait.”

He stopped and turned around, the foreign mixture of grief and hope looking out of place on his regularly strict countenance.

“Thanks. For…you know…” I didn’t express anything further than that, but I didn’t need to. My father was a man of few words, especially when it came to handling emotions.

A slow smile spread across his lips, and he nodded his appreciation. “Would you care to have dinner with me tonight?”

Not really, but I need to give the old man a little something.

“Sure,” I said.