Page 56 of Just Forever

She lets out a gasp and all her books go flying to the floor.

“Oh, shit,” I say. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t see you.”

I start to pick up the books, and she crouches down to do the same. “Don’t worry about it.” She rolls her eyes. “I never look where I’m going, so it was bound to happen sometime. I’m honestly surprised I managed to last until almost the end of November before I plowed into somebody.”

I get up and hand her the books. “Here.”

“Thanks.” She pushes her dark red hair out of her face before she narrows her eyes at me. “Lake, right?”

“Uh…” I’m startled for a moment that she seems to know who I am.

“I created our class group chat,” she continues, “so I know everybody’s names.”

I can feel my face heat because, number one, I have no idea what her name is. And number two, I’ve hardly been an active participant in the many, many,manychats people have going on in there.

Truth is, I haven’t exactly made an effort to be friendly to anybody.

“I’m Paige, by the way,” she says.

With no idea what to say, I go with a “Hi.”

I’m not good at making friends. At all. It’s why most of my friends are people I’ve known forever. Rachel, Sawyer, and I have known each other since we were in middle school, and since Kelly is Sawyer’s cousin, he just seamlessly moved into thefriend group once we were all in Brighton. Christ’s sake, I even married a dude I’ve known my whole life.

Clearly, I just don’t know how to make friends. I mean, I’ve managed until almost the end of November by only interacting with other people in a professional capacity, meaning I open my mouth only when school requires it.

“It’s really nice to meet you,” Paige says in the meantime, because she hasn’t gotten the memo yet that I’m hopeless at small talk. “Hey, if you’re interested, a few of us are headed out tonight. There’s a bar near campus we’ve been going to a lot. Nothing crazy. Just an opportunity to grab a drink. Vent about the week.” She shrugs one shoulder and her smile widens. “We have to stick together, I figure, to get through these next four years.”

She looks at me expectantly, and I nod.

Paige’s smile widens even more. “Great. I’ll send you the address. We’re there basically every Friday.”

She’s already pulled her phone out, her fingers flying over the screen.

My phone vibrates in my back pocket.

She shoulders her backpack. “I have to run, but I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah.”

She squeezes my forearm as she passes me and hurries out the door.

I pull my phone out on my way outside and find Paige’s message with the address of the bar. I stare at it for a while before I put the phone away.

This… It’s not like I’m planning to go.

I have stuff to do.

Laundry and dishes and… stuff.

The weather is nasty. It promises to rain later.

Yeah, I’m well aware I’m making excuses. The class group chat? It’s teeming with invitations to all sorts of activities and parties on a regular basis.Basketball tonight, anybody? Need two people. My date bailed, and I’ve got a spare ticket to go seeHamilton.Anybody interested? Study group on Wednesday. Party on Friday.

I’ve ignored all of that for months now. Partly because the spare time I have, I want to spend with Ryker, and I can’t exactly drag him along to basketball or to parties. Once, maybe, but if I start to bring him with me regularly, it’ll raise questions.

And with that being said, it’s also much easier to hide my relationship with him if I keep everybody at arm’s length. With a hundred and twenty people in my class, it’s easy to blend into the background.

I’m fine with it. It’s easier like this.

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