Page 72 of Just Forever

“Better late than never, isn’t it?” He looks out the window for a moment, a small frown on his face before he concentratesback on me. “Losing John like we did really made me think. He was my baby brother and…” His voice dies down, and he looks down on his hands for a while before he looks up at me again, uncommonly serious for Scott. “Life is short. If I don’t try to get to know you now, I might never get the chance again.”

“John died over two years ago,” I point out. That’s probably a callous thing to remind him of. He wasn’t at the funeral. I remember looking for him, but he never showed up, at least not while I was there. I’m not sure if that was Scott’s own choice or if he simply wasn’t invited.

He studies me with an unreadable look on his face. “Sometimes doing the right thing takes time. And guts.” He grins, then. It looks grim. “Things have always come easy to me. Grades. Football. School in general. I wasn’t used to having to make difficult decisions or consider the consequences of my actions. Your mother… It was a mistake we both paid for dearly. We destroyed our families as a result of a stupid, drunken mistake.”

His shoulders slump, and he hangs his head. If that’s not real remorse, he’s a hell of an actor.

I very deliberately stop that line of thinking. I’m doing that thing again.

Where a lot of people might try and see the best in people, for years, I’ve been gravitating toward looking for flaws. It’s been my armor from the world. In order to protect myself, I need to be able to anticipate the blows, so I need to locate people’s bad sides. Just in case. If there aren’t any? Don’t even worry. I’ll find something minor and blow it way out of proportion.

It’s how I made myself feel safe for years. With paranoia and low expectations.

Only then… Then, Ryker.

He’s not like that.

And after all this time with him, it’s possible, somehow, some way, that I’m not like that anymore either. At least not entirely.

“Do you come to New York often?” I ask.

He tilts his head to the side the tiniest bit.

“Often enough,” he says.

I nod. “You can, you know, text me or something when you do, and we can grab dinner, maybe? Catch up.”

“I can do that,” he says. Then he adds, “Thank you, Lake.”

“I’m not making any promises,” I mumble, because I’m still me and also a bit uncomfortable by now.

“That’s not what I’m after. Just a chance is enough for now.”

He pulls his abandoned cup of tea toward him, lifts it to his mouth and takes a big sip. He screws up his face almost immediately after.

He swallows audibly and pushes the cup away again. “Not a fan,” he says in a choked voice.

Despite myself, my lips twitch into a small grin. I guess this is technically a shared experience, so something we can bond over?

“The coffee was terrible too.” I shrug at the look he sends me. “If it’s any consolation.”

“Good to know.” He gets up. “Come on then. We’re going to find someplace with decent food and nice chairs. Experience tells me conversations flow better when people are comfortable, and I’m certainly not right now.”

I hesitate for a second because the realistic side of me says this might be one of those situations where it’d be sensible to part ways while we’re on a high note.

In the end, I follow him out the door anyway.

RYKER

I havezero idea what to expect from Lake’s meeting with Scott. Up until Lake told me about him, I didn’t even know Scott existed. John never once mentioned him the whole time he was married to my mother, which makes sense considering the circumstances.

Based on what Lake has told me, I gather Scott used to be pretty immature, with too much money, which isn’t a good combination. But it’s been years. He might’ve changed. Or he might’ve gotten worse. I have no idea.

Lake sent me a good luck text before the game, but I haven’t heard anything from him since, and he didn’t pick up the phone when I called him before I got on the plane.

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t worried about the outcome of his meeting with Scott, which means I do my best to get off the plane fast, and into my car even faster. Lake couldn’t drop me off yesterday because he had class, so I drove myself.

It’s past midnight when I unlock our front door and quietly drop my bag in the corner, too tired to do anything else with it right now. I peel off my clothes on my way to the bathroom, so my path there is littered with items of clothing, and once I close the door behind me, I’m naked. I take a lightning-fast showerbefore I grab my toothbrush. I stand on one leg and absently scratch my shin with the toes of my other foot.

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