Page 63 of Demon of Dreams

The only good thing I could say about Combat was that Professor Braverman—Noah—had ignored me completely. I didn’t know if it was by chance or design that he’d never come within ten feet of me all class. I was grateful for it, either way.

I closed my eyes, leaning the side of my head against the cool glass. I was exhausted, mentally and physically. Emotionally too, if that were possible. And at the same time, I felt this weird tugging in my core, like a string pulling me somewhere I desperately needed to go—only, I had no idea where that was.

It made me feel antsy in a way I didn’t like. Or maybe that was just what came from ruminating over my mistakes. I just hoped the tugging wasn’t my body trying to pull me back to Sean. Sweat broke out on my brow as I contemplated that. I really might vomit, if that were what the pull meant.

“I mean, you might as well tell us now,” Ash said behind me, and I spun around so fast I almost fell off the ledge.

He was standing in my bedroom doorway, Felix peering out behind him. I hadn’t even heard them open the door.

“What?” I blinked. Ash had a habit of doing this, I was learning. Starting a conversation as though we were already in the middle of it. “Tell you what?”

“Whatever’s wrong. You don’t seem to be the gruff and stoic type, and something’s clearly bothering you. You look terrible, too—like a consumptive Victorian ghost. And you’re going to tell us eventually. So I figured we could just skip all the private, angsty bits and go right to the part where you break down and spill your deep, dark secret, or whatever it is.”

“I want it on the record that I told Ash this was too pushy,” Felix said, his shoulders hunched. He towered above Ash, but looked like he was trying to shrink. “I told him you would tell us if you wanted to, and that it was rude to barge in like this.”

“And yet, you’re still here.” Ash threw him an exasperated look. “So clearly your objections aren’tthatstrong.”

“I’m here to rein in the worst of your excesses.”

“You’re here because you’re as nosy as I am, you just don’t want to admit it.” Ash turned back to me and smiled brightly. “I, on the other hand, am perfectly comfortable owning my nosiness. So, as I was saying: spill.”

With that, he walked into the room and plopped himself down on my bed. He folded his legs into a pretzel and brought his palms together, looking at me expectantly.

Dammit. I couldn’t deny something was wrong. If Ash and Felix had only known me for two days and could tell, then it must be obvious. But I couldn’t imagine telling them the truth.

So, it turns out I’m an incubus, but I have no experience to speak of, so I decided to have my first sexual encounter with a guy who treated me like absolute garbage. Oh, and I liked it. The sex, and the garbage. Something is deeply wrong with me.

No. God, no. I could barely even admit that to myself. There was no way I was going to say it out loud.

“I don’t have anything to spill,” I said, doing my best to look like I wasn’t hiding a hundred giant secrets. “I guess I’ve just been thinking about—well, everything. A few days ago, I was pretty sure I was going crazy, running away from monsters that looked like something out of a nightmare. And now, I’ve been told that not only are those monsters real, magic is too, and all sorts of paranormal beings, and I’m just supposed to roll with it? There’s a magical university, and I’m supposed to be a student here, and apparently it’s possible to make a globe of light with your mind, and I just…it’s a lot, is all.”

By the time I finished talking, I realized that maybe Iwasstruggling with all of this, in addition to the Sean stuff. I’d written letters—actual paper-and-ink letters—to the diner and the motel back home, that the dean had promised to mail for me. I’d told them I had no idea when I’d come back, or if I ever would. Writing that had felt like cutting the last cord tethering me to my old life.

Ash laughed. “Yeah, I guess when you put it that way, it really is a lot. I grew up with magic, so I tend to forget it’s not normal for everyone else.”

“It’s completely reasonable to feel overwhelmed,” Felix said from the doorway. “I’m sort of like Ash. I never knew a world without the supernatural. But even I had a hard time adjusting to life at Vesperwood. And I think just about anyone would be freaked out if they’d been attacked by tenelkiri.”

“Yeah, about that.” Ash looked at me with renewed interest. “I don’t mean to pry—”

“Too late for that,” said Felix.

“But what the hell did you do to get them interested in you?”

Leak my uncontrolled sex magic all over the place, apparently.

“I’m not sure,” I said aloud. “The dean didn’t seem sure either. He basically just said he hoped he could figure it out with time.”

That was more or less true, which made me feel better. I didn’t like lying to my new friends.

“Weird,” Ash said. “Maybe you’re some sort of chosen one or something. Here to save the world and teach us all the true meaning of life. Do you feel chosen-one-y?”

“I don’t think so.” I laughed nervously. “Unless feeling confused and lost counts as chosen-one-y.”

“Maybe it does,” he said brightly. “I’ve never been a chosen one, so I can’t judge.”

Felix snorted. “Or maybe Cory just got in the way of someone else that the tenelkiri were after. Maybe they wanted to attack the school, and just happened to run into him on the way.”

“Maybe.” Ash didn’t sound convinced. “When did you first see them, exactly? Were you already on your way here? Oh, which reminds me of something else I wanted to ask—why exactlyareyou here? You never told us. You seemed so confused about what Vesperwood was, when I first met you, but how did you end up here, if you didn’t already know?”

---