Page 44 of Without Pride and Prejudice

“He does not,” I said before I could stop myself.

Charlotte and Mary both gave me sideways glances.

“What I meant to say,” I laughed, “is that he is not acquainted with anyone here, so I imagine he will not wish to dance except with those in his company.” I blathered on like an idiot while trying to get Mary’s hair into a chignon.

Charlotte tilted her pretty head. I don’t care what Mrs. Bennet thought—Charlotte wasn’t plain. She had sparkling green eyes and neatly styled sandy-brown hair. When shesmiled, it was genuine and warm, much different from the version I knew in real life. Wait. Was this my real life now? I was so confused. Regardless, this version of Charlotte looked at me like I was a nutjob. Maybe I was.

“I hear Mr. Bingley already asked Jane for the first two dances. I do not see why Mr. Darcy would be any different,” Charlotte noted.

Oh, he was different, all right. I offered Charlotte a placating smile, knowing it would seem odd for me to continue to disagree.

It didn’t take me long to fix Mary’s hair. It wasn’t perfect, but at least it worked better with her delicate facial features, and it looked tidier.Please, please, let it stay and not embarrass her.Knowing my track record, I probably shouldn’t have helped her.

When we left the cloakroom, a small ensemble started to play a lively tune I believe modern-day Lady Catherine had called “Mr. Beveridge’s Maggot.” I only remembered it because of the odd title. But it meant this would be a country dance. Sadly, I didn’t really feel like dancing. My body ached, and I wasn’t sure jumping around was going to make it feel any better.

However, watching Jane stand up with Bingley lifted my spirits. Mrs. Bennet stood to the side in a dither, talking too loudly to Lady Lucas and Mrs. Phillips and saying things she probably shouldn’t, like, “Mr. Bingley is rich, you know. Five thousand a year. Jane and Mr. Bingley look well together, do they not?”

Mary and Charlotte, who hadn’t left my side, obviously heard her and giggled. I didn’t find it funny at all because I knew the problems it was going to cause for Jane and even Elizabeth—the real one, and maybe me too.

Watching Jane and Mr. Bingley reminded me that if Bingley was here, it meant Mr. Darcy had to be as well. My heart skippedseveral beats as I scanned the crowd for him, needing to see him. He was a link to Fitz in some cosmically weird way.

It didn’t take long to spot him across the ballroom, standing tall and aloof, making a cravat look oh so sexy and trying not to make eye contact with anyone. It was very much how Fitz used to behave in school. He didn’t want to accidentally give anyone an inkling he might be interested in speaking to them, even our professors. It took everything in me not to run to Mr. Darcy and beg him to help me out of this situation, but then I remembered he wasn’t my best friend. And who could forget our disastrous meeting earlier in the day? How could I recover from that?

But as if he knew I was peering at him, his eyes met mine. Instead of turning away in disgust like I assumed he would, his gaze penetrated me so deeply, I froze and held my breath. The moment didn’t last long. He shook his head as if bothered and then forced himself to look away.

I didn’t have time to process what had just happened because a man I didn’t know approached me as Mary, Charlotte, and I skirted the edges of the dance floor. He gave me a slight bow. “May I have the honor of this dance?”

“Oh, uh. I do not mean to dance tonight. I am not feeling well. Perhaps you could dance with my friend or sister.” I pointed to Mary and Charlotte, feeling so out of place. I wanted the script I’d memorized for Pride and Prejudice Park. Was I supposed to know this man? Was it rude to decline? I knew Elizabeth danced at the assembly in the book. Not every dance, but she did stand up a few times.

The man blinked as if I’d stunned him. “Er, all right.” He turned to Mary, who looked ever so pleased about the attention, even though it was secondhand. “May I have the honor of this dance?”

Mary paused pensively as if she were having an internal debate, like it would go against all she stood for if she danced.So, I did what big sisters do—I replied on her behalf, “She would be honored.”

Mary threw me a scathing glance, but it quickly softened into a smile.

“How odd,” Charlotte said as soon as the couple left. “Mary hates to dance. She would rather play the pianoforte or reflect on her moral inclination.”

Reflect on moral inclination? Well, that sounded like loads of fun. I wanted to say that it was probably a defense mechanism because Mary wasn’t sure of herself and probably had middle child syndrome, but I didn’t think those terms would mean a thing here. But, crap, did Mary’s change mean I was already ruining the story and my chances of leaving this place? Or was I going to have to live for eternity knowing I’d ruined one of the greatest novels of all time? That sounded like something that would happen to me. Look what I’d done in my real life—I could have been part of the UK peerage. Not that I ever really wanted to be, but that’s not the point.

“And you surprise me, Lizzy.” Charlotte and I weaved in and out among the spectators. “Declining Mr. Rutledge. His father is one of the wealthiest men in the county, and he is set to inherit. And I dare say Mr. Rutledge is most handsome too.”

I supposed he was handsome, but I only cared about one man tonight—the man I could feel staring at me. Don’t ask me how, but I knew it. It was like feeling Fitz’s eyes on me.

Charlotte and I found seats not far from Mr. Darcy and none other than Caroline Bingley, who had planted herself as closely as she could to him. I assumed the other woman was Mrs. Hurst. There was no Mrs. Hurst at Pride and Prejudice Park, since it was such an insignificant part, but they looked like sisters, both with auburn hair and haughty attitudes. Also, their velvet dresses spoke of which character they were in the story. And dang it if Caroline didn’t look like Winnifred. Ugh. Why?

I could only imagine what the real Lady Winnifred was doing right now. In the event that I was, in fact, dead, she would probably be throwing a party and trying to comfort Fitz. No doubt she and Fitz’s mum would be downright gleeful and probably picking out a wedding dress for Winnifred. In the event that I was still alive, I didn’t know what would currently be happening to my body. Maybe it was still lying in the field? If that was the case, Winnifred would probably try to stomp on my head and call it an accident.

While we sat there, a few more men asked me to dance. I declined each time, to Charlotte’s dismay and shock.

“You seem to be a favorite tonight,” she said, surprised. “Even more so than Jane.”

I wrung my gloved hands. “I cannot imagine why.”

Charlotte surveyed me carefully. “There is something different about you, Lizzy.” She seemed as perplexed as I felt.

I was grateful when the next man who asked me to dance extended his invitation to Charlotte, once I again declined. It gave me more time to observe Mr. Darcy. I wanted to apologize to him but knew I couldn’t approach him without a proper introduction, and I kept thinking about what Lady Catherine had said at Pride and Prejudice Park—“A lady must never force a man to pay attention to her.”However, I believed Mr. Darcy was paying attention to me. Each time I stole a glance his way, I found him staring at me. Of course, he would divert his gaze every time I caught him. It was kind of fun, except for the possibility that I wasn’t handsome enough to tempt him.

After the next set of dances was over, the ballroom became a flurry of activity as partners were exchanged and people headed for the refreshments. I noticed that all my sisters and Charlotte had found new dance partners. Mary beamed with pride at being asked once again. I was more than happy her hair was holding up beautifully. Maybe this once, I could help someone, even if itwas just a small thing. More interesting to me was Mr. Bingley coming to talk to Mr. Darcy.

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